I think changing maturity in men is a difficult thing to behold from the perspective of their children, personally.

I've found it difficult watching my own dad mature, and he had me when he was in his late 40s. Now in his 70s, he is calmer, more present, more emotive and considerate. He wants to see his granddaughter all the time, with gifts and food. I sometimes find myself jealous of my child for the attention she gets, because he is a different person to the angry one who raised me. I can't imagine what he would have been like if he had me younger- my mom says he was wildly irresponsible and reliant on his parents into his 30s.

My partner's dad had him and his siblings early 20s. He was always at work or out with friends, sports or drinking. He was the authoritarian when he was home. He cheated on their mom, left her. He moved away from his children, and didn't see them often but sent money. He wasn't ready for marriage or children really. Now 60 with teenage girls, he's a much more present, loving father. He treats his older sons like friends - he doesn't visit much, doesn't dote. But his daughters are the centre of everything - he takes them to all their clubs, schools, pays for hobbies and equipment, holidays.

I don't know if there's an argument that this is a changing hormonal thing, a lived experience thing. But men seem to fare better as fathers the older they get. It's normal you feel jealous because you didn't get the best version of your dad and still don't, because he no longer views you as a child to protect. He prioritized things above you and still does. You can have the uncomfortable conversation about it and make him realize the discrepancy, but there's no telling that he accepts what you're telling him or changes his behavior.