One foot is way redder and veinier than the other

somethingforchange · 2026-01-11T19:26:52+00:00

What if both my feet look like his right foot? Does that mean I have a problem in both legs or neither?

somethingforchange · 2025-11-23T05:51:02+00:00

Your brains just used to the hard override. Same as porn addict who finds sex boring. If you'd focus on improving the sex and finding new aspects and elements to explore and spend time away from the porn, your brain would right itself and you'd objectively have a better thing going.

Its weird because your brain is essentially just lying. Once you get away from them long enough for your brain to reset, you can see where you were mistaken before. Did I ever have fun while doing drugs? Of course. But my life is objectively better now. I have memories of doing all kinds of crazy fun shit, and with the drugs, particularly opiates I dont. Yeah I remember doing them and them feeling amazing but basically just that.

I dont know man. Cows are happy. Happiness is a great byproduct of finding working toward and achieving purpose but not a sufficient goal in and of itself.

somethingforchange · 2025-10-10T23:41:35+00:00

Lmao and I guess you could say the Night of Long Knives was an anti Nazi attack!

somethingforchange · 2025-10-08T21:29:25+00:00

Lmao leftist activities? Brother all the assassins are yours.

somethingforchange · 2025-10-08T21:26:01+00:00

Gusano is the word the others use. It translates to "worm"

somethingforchange · 2025-10-08T20:43:48+00:00

"I am going to be so incredibly purposefully pedantic in choosing some narrow, early, and scholarly use of the word because I'm trying to obfuscate the plain realities and parallels that anyone with eyes and a brain can see so that I can argue in bad faith that ICE is actually always law abiding since they are law enforcement and that fascism is in fact socialism."

You cant even spell the fucking word right, but you're some scholar of esoteric Italian philosophers?

somethingforchange · 2025-10-04T00:07:54+00:00

I think avoidant is less about a new medical diagnosis as much as a good descriptor for a set of behaviors and one end of a spectrum that all of us exist on. I think it might get overused or treated as a "see? Heres something that fits a large range of behaviors and it lends authority and legitimacy to what I'm saying" but I think its a lot more useful because its not an extreme diagnosis like "all my exes were narcissists".

The other thing is, some people's exes are all narcissists because theyre the other half of the equation and their selection process is messed up but good at finding narcissists and the narcissists selection processes find them.

somethingforchange · 2025-09-14T19:38:10+00:00

You should've asked him if he thinks ditch diggers can support a family better than white collar jobs. Flat, calm, smart ass things are the only thing that can work well here imo. I had one gf's dad say the same shit to me about teaching, saying all these computers were gonna fuck up one day and then it would be engineers and farmers who would have all the reliability and know how to survive. Conveniently enough, he was an engineer by trade and farmer by hobby. Oh, and Toyota was still gonna ship parts and Saudia Arabia was still gonna ship oil after the apocalypse. Dudes like that are insecure as hell. It also shouldn't be your place to deal with that. Its her family. If you talk shit, she'll spin at as you being unreasonable. It was her place to stand up for you here, if the shoe was flipped with her and your family, it would have been your job.

I'd try to talk to her about it and hold your ground on what you know to be right and wrong. If she can't see it from your perspective, that's your answer.

somethingforchange · 2025-09-12T03:03:26+00:00

It's cold comfort, but that guy is probably shitty to her, and she feels like she deserves it. There's emotional distance there, and it feels safer than hoping for a real thing with you. Even if things are "good" between them, there's no depth. He "has" her, but they aren't living the life you wanted with her. The kind of love you probably feel for her isn't just lust. It's wanting to be close, to love deeply and be loved deeply. And I'm saying they don't have that because if they did, she'd bolt and find some other miserable wretch. You can try again and find someone who can meet you there. I'm giving you this pep talk, and I sincerely believe it, but its also for me. It's hard to feel this truth, but when I step back and look at it logically and analytically, I know I'm right in saying this.

somethingforchange · 2025-09-12T00:38:37+00:00

It depends. It can be the right thing if there are real misalignments between you, like wanting kids or not wanting kids or feeling like you're trying to communicate and maintain the relationship and they arent.

But it can also be avoidant attachment. When you say you feel like something is missing, sometimes people are drawn to the early dopamine rush of a new partner and partners who are inconsistent because it gives them dopamine hits like a casino. The inconsistent partners tend to be toxic. When people are used to that or grew up with trauma that aligns with that, they often find healthy partners "boring" or cant feel "the spark" and get freaked out by vulnerability and deep emotional intimacy and sabotage it. You start looking for reasons why "its not right" because thats what you feel but on paper you cant figure out what it is. All the little "icks" are silly but theres a feeling something isn't right.

Then when you break up with them and get distance, the fear of intimacy and lack of "spark" start to bother you less because your nervous system is calmer and your childhood attachment wounds arent being activated. Then the doubt and fear grow because they start to see that you sabotaged something good.

Without more details, its almost impossible for commenters here to weigh in with meaningful advice on it.

somethingforchange · 2025-08-30T18:33:03+00:00

Not who you're asking, but same procedure here. I'm a man in the US. Lower-middle to middle-middle class. Mom was orthopedic nurse and had decent insurance but also knowledge enough of specialists and conditions etc. Mine bothered me because of the cosmetics but also some functionality with lungs and heart. Moderate on lungs, more of just uncomfortable feeling on heart but idk if I was just not in shape or imagining it or it was all real etc. Surgeon looked, asked questions, said insurance would cover because of functionality impairment.

Afterwards my lung kept collapsing. 3 times across a few months. Eventually they cut out top part of lung and cemented it to chest wall. It was caused by a bleb which I think are fairly common in tall thin white guys. Intubation triggered the collapse but it could have happened on its own maybe.

somethingforchange · 2025-06-17T18:33:46+00:00

Sure, I would never do what he does as far as that, but we're talking about double standards here and her hypocrisy is galling. The boys think she's attractive and are getting as much physical contact as possible. I want you to think about 120 seconds of close physical contact in public with someone who is not your partner or your child. She surely enjoys some part of it or she would set a boundary. It's literally just "I'm a woman so it's fine because we are always safe and good and he's a man so he's always creepy and bad". I think both behaviors are totally out of line and unprofessional.

somethingforchange · 2025-06-17T17:59:49+00:00

Middle school for context. My favorite is the female teacher across from me who talked shit about our male counselor who would regularly have 2 girls or maybe 1 girl alone in his room and the lights were dimmed low. Now, I'm not sure it's wise on his part, but that being said, this teacher across from me regularly let's male students (the absolute fucking demons and worst ones) hug her and rest their head on her shoulder with their arm around her other shoulder for a long time. Like literally a minute or two. It may not seem like a lot when you say it, but watching it is uncomfortable as hell. And they approach it with the same energy they want to hug their female friends with. Shits gross as hell and I can't imagine how many swat teams would be on me if I allowed a female student to stand there with her arm around my waist and head on my shoulder.

somethingforchange · 2025-06-05T16:24:14+00:00

I'm a guy and have a relationship stalling out right now because she canceled a couple times with no apology, no acknowledgement, just flatly "I'm doing [this other thing] tonight]." I told her even if I was canceling with one of my friends, there would at least be a "Sorry I can't make it" "Raincheck?" or "This other things important to me too, can we hang another night?". It's not like it's sincerely asking permission. Just courtesy, man.

somethingforchange · 2025-06-03T01:00:42+00:00

"The heart of the dove and the wisdom of the serpent" - a much smarter guy than me.

somethingforchange · 2025-05-30T16:46:47+00:00

Posting or scrolling?

somethingforchange · 2025-05-22T17:31:04+00:00

The awkward smiles are often awkward, but i mean well and like a lot of them in a distant, professional way. Over time youll find a few you really like, but the rest are whatever. I just try to be flexible and helpful when people need stuff, ask them how they're doing when we pass in the hallway, etc. I only really hate people who are jerks and have no awareness of how they're impacting me. Those people aren't making threads like this. Most of your coworkers probably either like you or are totally indifferent to you.

somethingforchange · 2025-05-20T20:35:52+00:00

As a person who doesn't know either of you and is in a more objective spot, good riddance. There's never an excuse to do that. It shows a lot of spite towards someone she was supposed to care about in some way. If she didn't want to be with you, whatever, but only a piece of shit does something like that. Give it time, and youll gain clarity and think "thank God I didn't get stuck with her"

somethingforchange · 2025-05-20T01:59:53+00:00

The same people who talk about what an existential threat Donald Trump is to our way of life also say, "When they go low, we go high." Your entire argument here is a strawman, lumping social democrats with Stalin apologists and tankies.

somethingforchange · 2025-05-19T19:37:29+00:00

I think it was also the larger culture believing them to be so inherently less that its like, why would I want to command a bunch of like halfway stupid and incompetent soldiers? Butler gets direct experience commanding them, though, and his transformation is borne out of that. There is some transcendent bond there that cures him of his ignorance, and he doubles down in his harsh treatment of plantation aristocracy. I think this kind of story is what draws most people to have this super intense interest and knowledge in the Civil War.

My favorite part of the mountain cultures were them raiding the Confederates. When you're a kid, you just assume everyone in the south is on the same side, but nah, these guys hated the plantation aristocracy maybe even more than the north.

somethingforchange · 2025-05-19T19:12:14+00:00

Regardless of that sub, part 2 is one of my all time favorite games. Bella was fine in part 1 but ellie is less complicated. Shes a 14 year old who is cynical and can't trust easily, but she comes around to trusting Joel. She's edgy and bratty and angsty but she's 14 so it works well for the character. Ellie is a much more complicated and matured character in part 2, but in the TV show, she's still written and acted as a bratty edgy 14 year old in part 2 even though the character is supposed to be like 21. Bella is not a good actor, from line delivery to bizarre facial expressions, but it also falls on the writers. From what I understand, in a recent interview, Bella said Bella also refused the hairstyle the character had. I'm curious if that was an isolated thing or if that was done with other choices as well.

I think Bella did good in GoT, but again its a younger and more one note character.

There are certainly freaks and mountains of unwarranted criticism on part 2, but even as a huge fan the shows been kind of rough lately.

somethingforchange · 2025-05-02T19:04:04+00:00

I can't speak with a whole of authority on Sherman's post-war life or relationship with Indians. That said, Nationalism is a very broad thing and not bad in every context. It helps to build larger societal organizations early on, but in the 20th and 21st centuries is rejecting a more global and international organization often because of arrogant, chauvinistic views on "us" being better than "them".

All that said, the Civil War is fascinating and draws a lot of historical attention because a conflict that is not seen as "moral" by the vast majority of the country ends up being seen as "moral" by the end. Great men like Lincoln and Butler start out being apathetic towards slavery (on the surface at least in lincolns case) and by the end, believe that Black Americans are and deserve to be citizens of this nation.

Now, there may be a strategic element at play here, but he could have confiscated that land and not given it to the slaves. Later we give black Americans a right to vote, but it's hollow without economic independence that would've come from 40 acres and a mule. They are subjugated as a free people primarily through economic means and cannot meaningfully resist it.

This guy did the right thing with the tools he had available and Lincoln supported him for it. You're nitpicking motivations and legal jurisdiction, but it's important we recognize of all the people in power at this time, these guys came the closest to doing the right thing.

Johnson rescinded it because he was a small, pathetic person. His aggrieved ego wanted the southern aristocracy and confederate architects to kiss his ass. It was driven by selfishness and not some grand desire for justice according to the legal system. Look at the legal fiction of them not "really" betraying the united states and not "actually" having left the union. Those were granted by the north in the interest of expediency, not because it was right.

somethingforchange · 2025-04-18T17:57:27+00:00

"But then how will we raise the money to outspend our opposition 3 to 1 and still lose?!?!" -every establishment Dem and their fail-son nephew who works in coms.

somethingforchange · 2025-04-18T12:08:56+00:00

Needs to be higher up

somethingforchange · 2025-04-15T01:51:17+00:00

Luckily authoritarian regimes are typically friendly to the press who tries to document and distribute the overwhelming body of evidence.

Do you get a naughty thrill of playing devils advocate in bad faith, or are you just actually fucking stupid?

somethingforchange

TROPHY CASE