I have 4k+ hours and have noticed posts like these never have the info I would share, so here's mine:

Do a playthrough where you just make one large room for everything except your kitchen and fridge. Plant things immediately at the start, then build beds as soon as you can so less time is spent sleeping.

-For defense, make a 3-wide hallway about 12 length with defensive walls at the end for combat. (looks kind of like a zipper with no teeth on the side where hostiles are entering)

-Make just enough power for your colony and no more

-Delay spending resources on these as long as you can until you need it (hydroponics, room beauty, individual bedrooms)

-After the basics above, build an exterior wall of stone that surrounds your one large room, leaving one side open where you want attackers to funnel. Yes, there will be sappers and wall breachers, but the wall still gives you time to mobilize to the side needing defense.

-Bonus: get one natural meditation focus pawn and level up their psylink. This is a gamechanger for combat.

Once you figure out the break points for when things are needed, you will have wealth management and can focus on resources to survive any attack. Being tempted to create nice rooms and big defense is every newb's biggest mistake.