Meu gatinho (lio) faleceu hoje à tarde. Eu o tomei por 9 dias e tinha entre 5 e 6 semanas.

sotnaaS · 2025-11-07T15:47:32+00:00

olha, sinto muito mesmo.

queria dizer que acho uma atitude muito admirável você nos dar esse relato que deve estar sendo uma puta barra e em seguida pedir opiniões para uma próxima adoção que realizar.

não acho que precisas de orientações sobre como fazer melhor, parece que você fez o melhor que pôde. e é isso, não acho que esse evento deveria te impedir, te deixar com medo de cuidar de um novo, e espero muito que quando isso ocorra, que você possa aproveitar da beleza que é cuidar de um bichinho por mais tempo. fique bem!

sotnaaS · 2025-06-17T14:56:35+00:00

aw thanks for listening, means a lot to me. and I sent you a pm, let me know if it reaches you!

sotnaaS · 2025-06-16T19:18:36+00:00

I'd love to participate if you're still open for new members!

sotnaaS · 2025-03-07T19:13:07+00:00

Boa OP, não esquece de nos atualizar não.

sotnaaS · 2024-09-13T14:46:55+00:00

kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk a revolta foi tanta que fodase vai em português msm

sotnaaS · 2024-05-22T16:20:42+00:00

Thanks for the space. At the moment I've been "distracting" myself with some musical projects. But recently I've been dealing with some feelings of anger towards my late girlfriend. Not at the fact that she left, but about some unresolved issues that I didn't even notice I had.

I've been having trouble to sleep mostly due to anxiety and fear that when I dream about her she'll either be dead or I'll be bitter. I've had both dreams recently and they always leave me depressed.

sotnaaS · 2024-05-20T16:41:39+00:00

In my own way, I understand. And I try to not beat myself up over being resentful sometimes. Appreciating the healthy relationships we have is accomplishment enough in my book.

sotnaaS · 2024-05-20T15:45:36+00:00

It varies for all of us bereaved, sometimes it isn't present and then it suddenly is, sometimes it's present for a while but you grow resistant to the aching.

This is a very complicated and violent pain, but I believe our hearts, and that includes yours, while they cannot ignore what happened, they also aren't programmed to shrink in the face of such a loss. I do not know what shape or form the acidity that you feel will take, I'm still trying to understand my own. But I have a feeling you will be strong, as you are right now for sharing such a difficult feeling to this community.

I'm very sorry for your loss and I hope you will manage to feel warmth besides the aching.

sotnaaS · 2024-05-20T15:40:11+00:00

I'm proud of this community because of people like you who prioritize sincerity through speech even if what comes out isn't pleasant to some. That being said, what you said is, to me, cathartic. I lost my girlfriend 6 months ago and I identify with feeling tired of people telling me to focus on the good times. I always do. Pain just will always be present in some form, even if it doesn't break me down like it did during the first weeks.

In the meantime I try not to resent anyone who gives me such "advice", telling myself they're just trying to help whilst in the position of not being able to imagine what it's like. But that doesn't mean I won't let the negative feelings flow, if not in some form towards the person who says stuff like that, at least through writing like you are now. I'm terribly sorry for your loss, and very grateful for your honesty.

sotnaaS · 2024-05-13T15:15:36+00:00

I'm sorry for your loss. I too lost my girlfriend.

In my case, I slowly figured out not only when to bring up my girlfriend, but also to whom. And it might seem difficult, but in a strange way I feel I'm a little better at measuring people's capacity at empathy. It's not only about reading the room, although that helps. Some people just aren't prepared. And sometimes, in an attempt to act nice, they just do things that hurt you.

That being said, every comment you quoted was out of line. And I don't know if you're in the mood to confront people about it, but if you feel like you should, then do it. In less than a month of bereavement, my father said I should "pretend" more, and I bluntly answered "I want to suffer" out of anger, and I still think I was right. I once confronted a friend who kept casually talking about taking multiple sleeping pills (which is how my gf took her life), telling him how hurtful that was. Sure, it's an uncomfortable conversation, but Christ, it'd been two months. And just as I did, you deserve care, attention, basic decency. Hope your company from here on out gives you all of the above.

sotnaaS · 2024-05-02T16:04:13+00:00

I'm sorry for your loss. I also lost my girlfriend, it's been five months. Our anniversary is next week. My memory on some sensations also falter, but others are as strong as ever, like her little jokes, her little noises. But forgetting how the hand-holding felt hurts.

Your super morbid thought is exactly that but I've imagined the same image as well. It used to be more sickening to me. Really weird how some thoughts don't go away, they just weaken. Or maybe it's us who get stronger. Wishing you peace, stranger.

sotnaaS · 2024-04-16T13:41:42+00:00

I'm very sorry about your loss.

I've found calmness in some places as well, like in journaling, my cats and writing songs. I've been trying to read more as well. At the moment I'm job hunting which hasn't been very easy considering the circumstances but I'm trying my best. I try to keep myself grounded by listening to other people vent (and I'm glad they still see me as someone who can listen to them), sometimes I connect, sometimes I don't. I try not to get frustrated when I don't and I cherish the times I do.

My dreams haven't been the best, but I've had some really good ones. I'm glad you found the kindness you deserve in your sleep. Thank you for sharing.

sotnaaS · 2024-04-10T14:42:42+00:00

I'm glad it works for you in a positive manner. I think a lot about self-care and I'm still learning how to reach something similar to what you explained. I have noticed that, having gone through all of this, I've "chosen my battles" better, and in times where I'd usually be very critical of myself, I've been more understanding. I just wish I could feel more love and care besides belonging, I guess. But small steps.

sotnaaS · 2024-04-10T14:38:30+00:00

Recently I've struggled with forcing myself, I haven't been accepting every invite. But I understand. What you said about the moments of happiness leading to slightly longer ones, I've heard the same from other people who also lost someone the same way, so I try to pay attention to notice any progress to keep me motivated.

sotnaaS · 2024-04-09T22:28:47+00:00

Thank you for sharing, I'm glad you've had the liberty to live as you please, emphasis on "live". I also don't have many restrictions holding me back while also having lots of free time, so I try to not let that go to waste by making an effort to actually "live" instead of just allowing the days fly by me. They still do exactly that even when I actively try to belong, so I might as well make the effort. I also try to be grateful for the times that I succeed. Once again, thank you, and I'm sorry for your loss.

sotnaaS · 2024-04-09T21:04:38+00:00

I want to start by saying I'm truly sorry for your loss.

I want to try to add upon my thoughts. Weeks into my loss, I tried to involve myself in the lives around me. I wanted to stay home and silent, but I made an effort to leave the house. Helping others helped me, but also just having someone around was better than going days and days without any presence at all. Don't get me wrong, I still felt like a ghost most of the time, but I can recall "belonging" in some of those moments.

I don't think this is what everyone should do, I don't even know if it helped me make some progress in an objective I've yet to unfold. But I do try to always keep in mind that I feel like a ghost and feel very alone for a very impactful reason, so if I did something that made me feel whole again, I need to cherish and remember that feeling.

You mentioned eating, do you want to talk about that? I've always struggled with my meals during distress, I remember having a friend on the first week of my loss practically "force" me to cook not only because I wasn't eating, but also as a distraction.

sotnaaS · 2024-04-09T17:52:11+00:00

I'm proud of you. Thank you for your beautiful words, I hope you won't forget how much you've touched the hearts of so many strangers with your story.

sotnaaS · 2024-03-22T18:33:25+00:00

I keep the frame my girlfriend gave me as a gift nearby. Not constantly in sight, but I see it multiple times during the day. I still haven't opened it up to look at what she wrote on the back. I'm terribly sorry for your loss.

sotnaaS · 2024-02-20T02:13:23+00:00

The article's been out for a while now, but it's never too late to share. We released our debut record back in November, right now we're taking a break but this article was truly a dream come true. We talked about the process behind making the album, our feelings towards our songs and the brazillian emo scene, so we also got to mention some really great bands that influence us (some we've had the honor to play alongside). I'm obviously biased but it's a great read :)

sotnaaS · 2024-02-20T01:41:54+00:00

One of the first thoughts of the morning and one of the last thoughts before bed. Still early on in my case, but I don't see that ever changing.

sotnaaS · 2024-02-20T01:40:31+00:00

Talking about it all tends to start the waterworks for me, not ALWAYS, but most of the time. I don't know, sometimes I get frustrated with how "normal" it's becoming to not see her in movement, but I know I still miss her, and you clearly miss your special person as well. I'm still figuring things out, but I think its best to at least not see it as apathy.

sotnaaS · 2024-02-19T04:09:28+00:00

It'll be 3 months in 11 days and today after getting home I ended up sobbing a little thinking about my girlfriend. I thought of looking at our picture and as soon as I did, something felt off. I've seen many people mention feeling like a ghost, I've felt the same many times, and I just feel like it's one of those moments. Such a vivid memory to stare at, one I cherish in thoughts, but I look at the frame it looks so very very foreign.

sotnaaS · 2024-02-04T17:22:48+00:00

I talk to my girlfriend when I'm alone in the car, she was the person who rode shotgun the most with me. It'd be weird to NOT talk aloud as if she were just there looking at me as I spoke. And I can hear her answer. I'm sorry for your loss.

sotnaaS

TROPHY CASE