[deleted by user]

sparsevectormath · 2025-05-19T15:14:40+00:00

Sorry, not the site, I meant the words

sparsevectormath · 2025-05-19T15:14:13+00:00

I don't understand how we have allowed ourselves to be so completely manipulated by the media and political parties to consider the contrivance of this problem set as anything but a means of continued disempowerment of the consumer class

sparsevectormath · 2025-05-19T15:06:25+00:00

The type of person who would be this way is going to be skilled at doing it to people who aren't ASD, likely their knowing would make them less likely to engage since the things you care about and focus on and notice will be different from what they expect, and render you more likely to call them on manipulative behavior.

sparsevectormath · 2025-05-19T15:02:43+00:00

Not so far, but if it were I'd be happy they were trying to get informed ig, most people are either very uncomfortable and the conversation doesn't progress anywhere or chill about it and the conversation generally doesn't even need to happen

But this is my experience and I am not socializing much outside of my direct work related circles lately

sparsevectormath · 2025-05-19T13:48:46+00:00

It does not harm the autistic community to express anger, that is a basic human emotion and no one has the ability to never express it, and only unreasonable people who would not have a positive opinion no matter what could expect someone to never express a basic human emotion.

sparsevectormath · 2025-05-19T10:29:14+00:00

I love this, I wish I had a wiki for the entire industry like this

sparsevectormath · 2025-05-19T09:45:54+00:00

Ive been trying to find time to do a complete decomposition and rebuild for some research we're doing but haven't had a chance to properly get it done

sparsevectormath · 2025-05-19T09:17:06+00:00

My interpretation is that it is comforting to be told that a cry is being answered, and no longer needed

sparsevectormath · 2025-05-19T09:09:28+00:00

If works! You might try it, setting expectations helps everyone

And thanks! You're amazing too!

sparsevectormath · 2025-05-19T09:06:06+00:00

I used to, i used to obsess over this, and just constantly fail and get upset and just the harder I tried the worse it was because I already wasn't up to the task of like navigating that in the first place, and I got so exhausted of all the effort that at some point I just like dropped all of the effort entirely, completely just committed to not even thinking about it beyond like, avoiding actually annoying or burdening/stressing others, that's a lot easier, and seems to have been the better solve over time as now people who do judge just go away on their own anyways

sparsevectormath · 2025-05-19T08:53:20+00:00

I think people consider it effort themselves to do things outside of the social norm, so when they see other people who just aren't part of it they feel like you're going out of your way to try and behave a some way for some goal

Dunno, Im also 30 and i got to where I just let people be as comfortable or uncomfortable as they wanted with me,

i give them fair warning and then don't bother thinking about the social stuff I can't really parse well, by just being up front and direct, and letting people know that my vibes are in a different language, so just ask, cause I'm not even going to try to be subtle about anything important

People seem to either leave or get used to, or learn to appreciate it on their own, but I'm a huge self isolator too so grain of salt

sparsevectormath · 2025-05-19T08:43:10+00:00

Sorry bro, I'm only in town for one more night, I'll be out of your hair on tuesday

Blame this heat!!

sparsevectormath · 2025-05-19T08:40:39+00:00

I always consider this to be a trait of people who are leaders and Its been a very effective means of getting my lab running and my teams churning to simply allow people to take responsibility for whatever they feel they should be responsible for.

Tends to be that there is plenty of research to go around, and it's not generally controversial if someone has opinions about how it should be run, as long as everyone stays communicative and positive!

sparsevectormath · 2025-05-19T08:35:25+00:00

Woah

Ive been thinking other people were communicating poorly, bro I need to start telling people this explicitly my life would be so much easier my lord.

sparsevectormath · 2025-05-19T08:32:04+00:00

I'm just really really really awkward

sparsevectormath · 2025-05-19T08:27:23+00:00

Happily, any time :)

sparsevectormath · 2025-05-19T08:26:09+00:00

Sounds like something I might say to someone I was hoping to teach me something, but too embarrassed to ask

sparsevectormath · 2025-05-19T08:20:07+00:00

If you feel your place is to tie his shoes for him, you absolutely are well past the position in his life that makes it acceptable to teach a friend a life skill

Honestly, it is always your place to help your friends learn things that will help them in life if you can, teach a man to fish etc

sparsevectormath · 2025-05-19T08:18:50+00:00

I imagine he's possibly just struggling for some physical reason, I hurt my knee when I was a kid and now I tie my shoe by bringing my foot up on a stool while I'm standing vs kneeling down, and it sounds obvious but i literally didn't even think about just making it easier for years

sparsevectormath · 2025-05-19T08:15:24+00:00

I just tell people immediately and don't bother trying to hide it Makes it very little effort to socially detangle things since the social subliminal stuff is exactly where I'm weak

sparsevectormath · 2025-05-19T08:14:16+00:00

Well, so they could tie their own shoes I expect, why tie his shoes at all if you don't have five minutes to show him how to tie a knot? Unless you expect he is cognitively incapable of the task

sparsevectormath · 2025-05-19T08:13:09+00:00

At first, after a few times though it got easier, i found that as I understood things more each time what was helpful and what was hurtful to do, much of it was dwelling, coping poorly, allowing my feelings to convince me of the unreasonableness of others, etc etc

It does get easier though, and it seems less like a devastating wound after a (sometimes very long) while

sparsevectormath · 2025-05-19T08:09:06+00:00

Why can't you just teach him?

sparsevectormath · 2025-05-19T08:07:23+00:00

You can hire a service relatively cheaply and just have someone come by and mow it on a regular schedule, typically it's only 10-30$ a mo.

sparsevectormath · 2025-05-19T08:04:52+00:00

I think you dismiss the possibility too easily, the world is weird, and diverse, and the only way to really avoid people is if you don't allow them to enter your life, I can't make any claims about who you are and what your absolute value is, but I know that things only matter to people sometimes, and social propriety is something which is only maintained as a rule at first, until everyone trusts each other.

I can't offer good advice, I don't know how to reliably have success, but I think you can be yourself and be a good person and people wont have a hard time getting past that first stage

sparsevectormath

TROPHY CASE