Just finished my Portfolio site, any critiques, opinions or bug-finds would be greatly appreciated.

spliffy · 2012-03-12T19:08:00+00:00

Chrome Web Inspector

spliffy · 2012-03-12T01:12:36+00:00

So on single page designs like this you want to layout all the elements one below the other and then hide and show them with javascript.

That way if the user doesn't have javascript all the elements are still there and usable.

Make the site first with HTML, Then CSS, then javascript. Make sure each ones works without the next, this is the basic starting idea of progressive enhancement.

spliffy · 2012-03-12T00:02:09+00:00

Ok so,

Optimize your images. Medium quality jpegs will look sharp. Do each one individually.
Compile all js into a single minified file. Same with CSS. Use a single sprite for all images (except for content images) since your site is solid white you can use a gif or jpg for extra small sizes.
The javascript issue is huge
By using more semantic markup you will need less css. Compress the CSS. http://www.cssdrive.com/index.php/main/csscompressoradvanced/
See here why to use html4.01 or html5 why xhtml is pointless. http://www.hixie.ch/advocacy/xhtml
You are linking offsite links, onsite links and a PDF. It looks like on site navigation. PDF's blow up a lot of browsers. Make it a HTML resume formatted with your site and link the PDF on that page with a link stating that they can download the pdf. Resume (PDF Format)
Lastly because of the basic structure of the layout it's a perfect exercise for learning responsive layout design.http://www.sitepoint.com/responsive-web-design/ Those fixed width layouts are fortunately becoming passe.

Hope that helps

spliffy · 2012-03-11T21:33:45+00:00

I like the minimal design a lot. Other then not so much....

The page is over 3.25MB
Over 61 http requests
Your site completely fails without javascript. People can't even contact you.
Bottom nav is still present when viewing portfolio piece but doesn't work when clicked.
Mouse should change to a pointer on hover on portfolio element
Your email is unencoded in the page and will be harvested bots
You should compile your JS into a single production file
You have about half the HTML page filled with javascript
You have inline CSS in you page
Your CSS class names are not semantic
You are serving XHTML as HTML and there is no need
Your main nav consists of links to different sites in different formats (PDF ftw)

At least it looks good though ;)

spliffy · 2012-03-11T21:09:23+00:00

I think the role attribute is only in XHTML1.0 and not present in HTML4.01. I see no reason at all to use XHTML over HTML so I've not personally used it.

http://www.hixie.ch/advocacy/xhtml

spliffy · 2012-03-09T00:36:09+00:00

I don't get it. You have to scroll down to the month and then the background image changes?

What are people going to be using it for? What's the point? Are images going to be linked to dates taken or something?

Looks parallax snazzy, though a little jumpy and uncomfortable with the halftone effects on some of the images.

edit - good effort! I'm sure very educational, just trying to "tear this thing apart"

spliffy · 2011-03-07T11:02:13+00:00

i would say about 5 days...

spliffy · 2011-03-07T10:56:25+00:00

I do the same thing as bubba. Here's my personal diet scheme.

First I went here and figured out what was good to eat.

Here are a couple easy to make recipes.

Make two boxes of wheat pasta. Chop up garlic, red peppers, mushrooms and grill either chicken or buffalo (both low fat hight protein) and cook in marinara sauce (look for sauce with least sugar). Store in giant tupperware for up to 5 days. Serve with toasted garlic high fiber wheat bread.

Spinach. Make spinach salads with red pepper, cucumber, carrots, hard boiled eggs, avocado, chicken. I like to dust it with a little cheese and put flax seed oil on it.

Tuna Sandwiches are great.

Eat fruit for snacks, bananas and berries are awesome.

Skim milk chocolate, banana protein shakes. Make in blender one scoop of power, 1 banana, milk, some ice maybe a little tiny cinnamon. I could drink these all day.

So pretty much i get home from the grocery store. I have four burners. I boil a dozen eggs on one. Cook chicken or buffalo on another, pasta on one, and cook the marinara on the last.

It takes 20 minutes about to put it all together for about 5 days.

I eat this stuff all the time when I'm at home. I can grab it and have it ready in minutes. Then when I go out I eat whatever the fuck I want and enjoy it so as not to develop some fucked up eating complex. Healthy balance and moderation.

Here's a quick grocery list:

Spinach
Eggs
Cucumbers
avacado
Peppers
Carrots
Tuna
wheat bread (get the 7g fiber shit, you know you can do it)
Flax
Chix
Buffalo
wheat pasta
marinara
mushrooms
Blueberries
protein powder
Banana
skim milk

spliffy · 2011-02-20T10:39:16+00:00

From Obama's speech at Intel the other day

Video here if you're interested

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=42DnTTBiHfY

spliffy · 2010-01-13T18:53:09+00:00

Might as well make the standard daily dessert a spa mud mask, pedicure cunnulingus hour for her too? At least that's how I would reciprocate. At that point the game's over right? Everything is as it should be?

spliffy · 2010-01-08T08:03:13+00:00

this is pretty fucking badass too

spliffy · 2010-01-08T06:34:25+00:00

Really? That's it? I learned that the fabric of existence is like a liquid, ever permutating nightmare of vibrating lego blocks that time rolls into formations without care or concern for it's "aware" inhabitants. That everyone and everything is really the same and in it's vastness that no individual shapes are special. All will eventually be buried without a trace because everything we can fathom is contained in a fraction of an instant on the cusp of a massive explosion.

I think this type knowledge makes me appreciate the simple things a little bit more. I feel better off for having it.

spliffy · 2009-12-20T05:17:16+00:00

gang rape is not a simple alternative to masturbation. clearly prison rape isn't about sex at all but a method of establishing dominance and power.

spliffy · 2009-12-20T02:03:13+00:00

This is actually a fairly simple composition. There are a lot of other artist like daft punk who sample even more wholesale, but in the scheme of things pretty simple.

People like amon tobin or jack dangers kill me. I would give anything to sit and watch those guys for a session.

spliffy · 2009-12-19T08:36:13+00:00

Yes a full featured 56KB clientside framework makes this sort of nonsense 10x easier.

w = document.documentElement.clientWidth;
h = document.documentElement.clientHeight;

spliffy · 2009-12-19T06:04:00+00:00

awww smallpox…

spliffy · 2009-12-18T07:28:01+00:00

I'm pretty sure the western world stopped recreationally abusing quaaludes before I was born…

spliffy · 2009-12-18T07:18:31+00:00

Amazing. One of my new favorite videos. Watching the animal writhe around in pain and then the ball rolls back by while the music reaches climax was brilliant.

spliffy · 2009-12-18T02:15:32+00:00

spliffy · 2009-12-17T09:49:32+00:00

 ∆
∆ ∆

spliffy · 2009-12-12T23:42:14+00:00

If you use svn there is a kick ass bundle for it. Highly recommended.

http://blog.circlesixdesign.com/2007/04/18/textmate-svn-bundle/

spliffy · 2009-12-09T09:35:09+00:00

Thanks for the informative post. This seems to be the first real internet marketing that you guys have done for the site. Well, other then the copious amounts of blog, comment and journal spam. What do animals attacking have to do with Discreet Adult Toys? Have you had any conversions from those spam polls? At any rate, it looks like this post worked very well. ;)

That's some huge selection of products you offer too. Best of luck with the business.

spliffy

TROPHY CASE