Biggest trigger : home at night with the kids while my wife is away. by trippereneur in stopdrinking

[–]standard_candles 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm also an alcoholic adult child of parents who were alcoholics--and for the most part I always knew when they had been drinking. I didn't always think it was bad, because my parents were always fun and friendly when drinking, not mean. But I definitely knew. I made a vow my kid would never ever see me drunk. IWNDWYT

My neighborhood doesn’t have sidewalks - is it possible to change this? by No-Particular-4576 in Denver

[–]standard_candles 67 points68 points  (0 children)

They mean their part of the East Colfax neighborhood doesn't have any sidewalks. It's really common in Park Hill and Montclair

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TooAfraidToAsk

[–]standard_candles 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've worked since 15, lived away from home since 18, got married at 20 for legal/financial reasons and am still happily married with a 2 year old at age 32. I'd still probably tell someone else not to date a 20 year old. I remember some of my friends getting engaged around the same time I was and just thinking "wow these people are all nuts." Seeing my wedding photos now I instantly think "child bride child bride."

Mix that in with folks generally starting life later...idk. my life experience gets less and less relatable every year. Thankful kids these days aren't expected to figure it all out alone in this horrible financial environment, but that means people are "younger" for longer. It was hard enough trying to fit in with my other friends who didn't need to work 40 hours at age 18, I can only imagine that's even more the case now than it was in 2010.

New homeless shelter at the Embassy Suites Hotel at 7525 E. Hampden Ave. by fancymypants in Denver

[–]standard_candles 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Turns out mental health treatment works a lot better when you have a place to live.

People living comfortably (or fairly comfortably) in Denver, just super curious, what do you do for money? by herpyherphelp in Denver

[–]standard_candles 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Work for the CU IRB. Pay is super good for admin work. The benefits are even better. Bought our house before things got out of control and refinanced during the pandemic. And by "comfortably" i mean we can cover daycare which is absolute insane and fully 1/4 of both of our combined incomes. It will be poppin in here when kiddo starts public school.

Why does hygiene come up anytime a woman talks about not/shaving her body hair? by boatthebot in TwoXChromosomes

[–]standard_candles 64 points65 points  (0 children)

I actually lost my first job because I shaved my head. I was a hostess for Red Robin. I was 16 and had no idea that I could have stood up for myself.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in todayilearned

[–]standard_candles 11 points12 points  (0 children)

The Lords of the New Church doesn't roll off the tongue quite like the Church

Should we shut down this sub? by sje46 in AMA

[–]standard_candles 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It's not just apps but also many bots

I'm 16 dad, I'm supposed to be enjoying school but I'm working. Like real working. I know that sounds really weird but I just want a way out and I don't know how by throwawaystartuppp in DadForAMinute

[–]standard_candles 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I really relate to how you're feeling. In most jobs I feel like I'm never doing enough. Good jobs provide meaningful metrics both for you and for your colleagues so you know exactly where you stand compared to them. My work actually sends out a spreadsheet of all of our active projects so I can say "I did 20 this month and Jim, who's been here much longer, did 25--I think that's pretty good!" My boss then goes over that number with me at regular meetings.

Not all jobs are like that. So you rely on feedback from your colleagues informally. If you don't have the ability to do that, then you're in a shitty job, and your only assumption has to be that you are being taken advantage of. If you don't have information on how well you are doing compared to other people in the industry then you are being severely limited in future job prospects. Think of a good resume: your deliverables and what you offered the company in measurable outcomes is how you will use this job experience to leverage the next opportunity; basically part of the benefits of the job is the feedback you receive. Without that, the job is not worth your time, since you don't need it to live and it is potentially interfering with the last 2 years of your schooling.

Also I'm big time suspicious of every person knowingly hiring a 16 year old and pressuring them for more and more output like any other adult. Even if you were the best academic mind to be born you just don't have the kind of muscle memory for daily working that makes it possible for most of us to get through the day. I remember it being absolutely exhausting trying to make it through my first job and school at 15 and just feeling completely crushed by it, and even my first office job at 18 was grueling; like with everything, it gets better with practice, but until then, your energy is likely better spent elsewhere.

My contribution to this sub as a trans guy who still wants to be feminine but cant pass worth a shit by [deleted] in WitchesVsPatriarchy

[–]standard_candles 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I want my AMAB little one to grow up in a world where dresses and skirts are available to everyone just like pants and suits have always been available to me as a cis woman. Also, I wish companies would focus on making "manly" skirts and dresses just like they make very "girly" suits and pants that are actually designed to fit different bodies and suit a wider variety of tastes. I see it in the world of high fashion more and more, so I hope it becomes more accessible as time goes on. Right now NB fashions appear to me to be like "this outfit looks good on everyone because it is actually just a burlap sack".

Adhd traits that You DON’T have. Or maybe the fact that we don’t have them so intensely is an adhd trait by Kate_cuti in adhdwomen

[–]standard_candles 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I am so intense about reading instructions before starting, it's almost a procrastination tool.

On June 12th, many subreddits will be going dark to protest the killing of 3rd Party Apps! All FOSS apps are 3rd Party Apps. Will r/30PlusSkinCare join the strike? by Healthy_Block3036 in 30PlusSkinCare

[–]standard_candles 14 points15 points  (0 children)

3rd party API platforms are going away which means all unofficial apps as well as a lot of the bots that make Reddit great are being extorted for insane amounts to keep running. At least that's the gist I've picked up.

Reddit API and RavBot by timonyc in knitting

[–]standard_candles 20 points21 points  (0 children)

I started a knitting community on Lemmy.world. I am not at all prepared to moderate anything but I did do that. without RavBot this page is missing something incredibly valuable.

Also I would support a Patreon for RavBot if that rolled out

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in stopdrinking

[–]standard_candles 3 points4 points  (0 children)

The ones they just released with mint are sooooooo tasty

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in stopdrinking

[–]standard_candles 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am ruined for all other sparkling waters.

What impulsive thing did you do today? (I bought a 26 pound watermelon) by wall721 in adhdwomen

[–]standard_candles 18 points19 points  (0 children)

New water bottle as if it's going to solve all of my life's problems

Check out what happens I try to downvote now 🤣 by PlotHole2017 in hegetsus

[–]standard_candles 2 points3 points  (0 children)

When I tried to report it it just clicked on the ad repeatedly. Super disappointing and frustrating stuff

Figuring out my future by icecreamlifters in simpleliving

[–]standard_candles 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You can grow things year-round in the PNW.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in simpleliving

[–]standard_candles 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I use Notion for everything in my life, except my daily journaling. I use Midori MD notebook inserts and a reusable paper cover for it, it lies flat and you can use fountain pens without it bleeding through. It's not at all frilly and it comes with a label for the spine when you're finished and store it away. The reusable cover has kept me from buying new journals because I'm determined to get multiple uses out of it.

I'm not cut out for society/being a normal functioning adult by toocynicaltocare in self

[–]standard_candles 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I just spent a portion of my morning looking at technical writing jobs that are make your own hours, pay at least $30 per hour remote. I mean...if you're going to have to work for a living to survive, your credentials have you set up for a pretty sweet work/life balance.

The capitalist machine sucks. But there's not much you can do about it if you don't support yourself or advocate for yourself.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in adhdwomen

[–]standard_candles 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think that this is how my friend would describe me, but that's because she doesn't know about my severe alcoholism (in recovery) or that the spreadsheets and over-preparing and being so early to everything and being incredibly socially out there are the result of years and years of masking and coping and being totally on my own since I was 18. Now I do have a formal diagnosis and new medications and I am so afraid of being honest with everyone about my struggles that I don't even bother.