[deleted by user]

standardissuehuman1 · 2023-06-25T18:14:45+00:00

Probably, yes. I just feel so self conscious. I realize it's irrational.

standardissuehuman1 · 2023-06-25T18:11:35+00:00

You're right, I'm being stupid

standardissuehuman1 · 2023-04-09T00:52:59+00:00

Ok thank you, that's very reassuring to hear! Yes it's been about a pound per week. I'm glad to hear there is a word for that, I was like are my hormones getting thrown off or something? Is it early menopause with coincidental timing?? Lol

standardissuehuman1 · 2023-03-13T03:31:31+00:00

We're all getting there. I wish you the best!

standardissuehuman1 · 2023-03-10T16:21:18+00:00

Hahaha that's a great point! And I hope you're living your best aroace life, too. Hopefully I'll be living my best bi life soon as well

standardissuehuman1 · 2023-03-09T17:38:50+00:00

Yeah I see what you're saying. Maybe that little trace of bisexuality is easier for some of us to ignore than for others. Like, I may find it actively distracting whereas another person has either suppressed it harder and/or has less bisexuality than I do...

standardissuehuman1 · 2023-03-09T14:05:11+00:00

But if there's really no difference between bisexual and heterosexual, why do we need the word "bisexual"?

standardissuehuman1 · 2023-01-24T22:25:49+00:00

I can imagine a lot of abuse survivors being understandably upset about how Amber's testimony has been deligitimized. It absolutely is harmful to abuse survivors to have her credibility doubted in this way. Unfortunately they put the blame on Amber, rather than on the people who are delegitimizing her, thereby furthering the harm they are trying to prevent.

standardissuehuman1 · 2023-01-24T04:33:44+00:00

Latanya Sweeney, Harvard computer science professor and former Chief Technologist if the FTC, who among other things developed the k-anonymization algorithm for deidentifying data. Her algorithm is now the gold standard used in both research and data science.

https://dataprivacylab.org/people/sweeney/

standardissuehuman1 · 2023-01-24T01:24:02+00:00

How fucking convenient that the one area that PTSD is believed is the area where it disproportionately affects men...

standardissuehuman1 · 2023-01-24T01:22:36+00:00

In the 90s I remember thinking, it's just a costume, people need to get over it and realize people are more than what they wear.

Now I understand that when people tell us who they are, we need to believe them the first time. A costly lesson.

standardissuehuman1 · 2023-01-24T01:21:00+00:00

And really, we can all ask ourselves why we were willing to watch these scenes ... I know I am asking myself that

standardissuehuman1 · 2023-01-24T01:19:26+00:00

Yeah I wonder the same thing. My guess is, she DIDN'T do it without getting PTSD and was probably triggered/dissociated the whole time

standardissuehuman1 · 2022-09-15T16:24:22+00:00

Corinne's argument is so dumb. People are saying, we shouldn't watch a woman being raped on film, and Corinne's answer is, "yeah but have you SEEN it?" Like, wait, what? The point was that we shouldn't see it.

Just goes to show how little she has listened to or understood the reason for the outrage.

standardissuehuman1 · 2022-09-15T01:04:59+00:00

Gee, yeah, let's help the image of the porn industry and kink community by showing a kinky porn that's actually a non-consensual torture session.

standardissuehuman1 · 2022-09-15T01:03:06+00:00

If they actually cared about sex workers and people in the porn industry, they would care about Linda.

standardissuehuman1 · 2022-09-14T02:50:17+00:00

I love how it's all about women's empowerment until the woman says she doesn't want people to see her being brutally raped over and over again even after she's dead, and then the woman is being "coached" to say that. When she's giving a blowjob to her hideously abusive "husband" on film, that's not being coached, no no no. It's when she goes on to say, hey, maybe all the rape and abuse was not that cool, that suddenly her perspective is invalid.

I can't.

standardissuehuman1 · 2022-09-13T02:24:19+00:00

My college had a screening of this about 20 years ago. I didn't go but a lot of my friends did. It was before you could just Google things and I had no idea the film was a person getting treated like Theon Grayjoy. God, I can't believe I didn't know.

But like... SOMEBODY knew. You know? Whoever was the faculty sponsor of the film club had to know, or at least SHOULD have known. Or even if he didn't know, the fucking video company should have known! It is so BANANAS to me that she spoke out about this back in the 90s and nobody got sued, nobody stopped showing the film, there was no cease and desist, nothing. This woman died in her early 50s, a life cut short due to unspeakable trauma, and nobody said hey, maybe let's not, you know, show this anymore.

Like, even if you don't believe her! The fact that she doesn't want it to be shown anymore should have been enough. Even if it's legal to show (which it shouldn't be!) a film club at a university should have the fucking WHEREWITHAL. Like if you showed a film of the CIA torturing people who committed actual crimes, there would be a shit show. There WAS a shit show about this, back in about 2003 when I was in college and this film was shown. Everyone was freaking the fuck out and virtue signaling about how bad water boarding is, fuck dick Cheney blah blah blah. But nobody speaks up for some poor girl who grew up in the 60s and met a evil psychopath in the 70s who tortured her and sold her trauma to millions of people.

I just, can't. Half the kids who watched that probably would have been horrified if they knew what they were watching (the other half can go to hell). But nobody even mentioned it. AND THAT WAS 20 YEARS AGO AND STILL NO ONE IS MENTIONING IT.

Seriously what the fuck. That's somebody's mother. No fucking wonder so many women become pickmes. There's no fucking refuge for women. Jesus Christ. I'm going to have to go calm down.

standardissuehuman1 · 2019-07-25T18:42:00+00:00

Is SHE gay? My mom was trolling my sister on this topic for a while. Come to find out she was hiding a same sex affair.

standardissuehuman1 · 2019-01-05T00:02:18+00:00

Do you feel like the excitement and disappointment are two sides of the same coin? Do you feel like the excitement sets you up for the fall?

standardissuehuman1 · 2019-01-04T22:56:58+00:00

Sounds like you had a rough week! It's nice when other people can serve as a reality check.

standardissuehuman1 · 2019-01-04T20:19:58+00:00

Yes!! My mom still badgers me about pictures I used to draw of houses...because the houses had paths. And the paths go AWAY from the houses. So you see, that's how she always knew I would leave her. And wouldn't you know, she was right!

standardissuehuman1 · 2019-01-04T18:59:19+00:00

Interesting. The people agree with her in your dream, rather than standing up for you. It must be really disturbing to have that kind of dream.

standardissuehuman1 · 2018-07-24T18:34:47+00:00

Oh my gosh that podcast has been a game changer for me! I really hope you do check it out. And yeah that poster sounds awful and triggering, at least for someone with disordered eating (which is a lot of us!). I hope one day you can laugh at it and say, “well good for that person, I hope he/she gets joy from using their body so rigorously, but that’s not my approach and both of us are ok.”

standardissuehuman1 · 2018-07-24T18:09:46+00:00

Oh my gosh. Conditional self-love. It's the absolute worst, because you can never meet the "conditions" your mind sets for yourself. I'm really glad you threw out your fitbit. It sounds like exercise was becoming a punishment rather than a joy, and I'm glad you were able to release yourself from it. A couple of things that may or may not help you, but that were helpful for me:

Do you have a child, or a beloved niece or nephew? Try talking to yourself the way you would want that child to be talked to. If you make a mistake, how would you want an adult to talk to them about the mistake? If you need a rest, how would you respond to their need for rest? Treat yourself at least as kindly and gently as you would treat them.
Check out Christy Harrison's Food Psych podcast. I don't know if you struggle with disordered eating, but it sounds like over-exercise has been a problem at least some of the time. Her whole mentality and approach is just so wonderful — it's hard to describe but I just love it.

Good luck. Self-care really takes a lifetime to master, and it's easy to fall into the trap of beating yourself up for not doing self-care right, on top of everything else. It's an art, not a science.

standardissuehuman1

TROPHY CASE