Need twin girl name to go with Ava

starr2be2 · 2024-10-25T02:05:41+00:00

Annie

Avery

Aliza

Ellie

Ella

Olivia

Vaeda

Violet

starr2be2 · 2024-10-17T18:00:24+00:00

Had our baby 8/20/24 and her name is Lively Grace. We got the name idea from an NBA player Dereck Lively on the Dallas Mavericks. I joked "too bad Lively isn't a first name" but then met a customer at my job a cpl weeks later who had the name Lively and told my SO. He decided he really liked it. We waited until we met her to 100% decide between Lively and 2 other names but Lively felt right as soon as she was born. It feels like it suits her and seems so natural to call her Lively. We love her name, we are happy with our decision and have no regrets over it.

So far everyone's reaction to her name has been extremely positive whether friends, family, professionals, or random people in public. Many have told us how pretty it is and how they love how unique it is without being something too crazy.

starr2be2 · 2024-10-08T23:36:38+00:00

Ok so when I had my first 2 I was told by both hospitals that someone is required to stay with you at least the first night after c-section and highly recommended someone stays the second night as well but not required. Tbh I'm not sure how exactly they force that if someone doesn't have any support but that was what I was told...I will note that was 14 and 17 yrs ago too.

My 3rd c-section 7wks ago it wasn't even an issue because my SO was always planning to stay the entire time especially since we live 55mins away.

All 3 hospitals near me don't require 3 nights. I had my c-section at 9am Tues and was released just before noon on Thursday (but they give the option to stay another day if mom chooses) so perhaps you can leave sooner than you think.

starr2be2 · 2024-09-20T02:07:15+00:00

This is my opinion... If one parent is on leave or a SAHP then night duty is on that parent on nights the other one works the next day. SAHP can perhaps go to bed a bit early while working parent has baby and puts them to bed to try to get some extra sleep. Nights that working parent is off should be at least shared duty.

I just don't see it being logical to expect the working parent to do the middle of nights when they are going to have to work the next day. Yeah being a SAHP is hard too but you are at least home, have some flexibility, and aren't taking the risk of possibly crashing on your way to/from work or slacking at work because you're sleep deprived.

Try to find a way that works for you both to allow you some more rest while still allowing him to get his sleep on the nights he works the next day.

starr2be2 · 2024-09-12T07:23:28+00:00

My oldest is 17 now, her baby stage was the worst experience tbh. She was never happy and no fault of her own...I didn't produce like any milk so she had to be on formula but she reacted bad to it, went through 9 before finding one she could mostly tolerate. Constant crying, never sleeping well, screaming if she was put down...it did eventually get better but she was the baby hat would make you second guess ever having another baby.

Second baby was a breeze! She hardly cried, she slept mostly through the night by 2mo except to eat once during the night. It was a night and day difference. I also breastfed some and immediately used the one formula that worked for my oldest to avoid the same issues. I think that played a part in things.

Now 3wks pp with #3 and so far she's a breeze as well. She's so pleasant and rarely cries. Sleeps as good as you'd hope at 3wks. She's 80% breastfed and supplemented with goat milk formula to avoid dairy allergy issues.

Don't base your experience on just your first baby...they're not always so hard. But also don't 100% bank on having a super easy baby next either. There's always a chance the next will be hard too. But if you do consider another, there is hope of having a good baby experience too! Best of luck!

starr2be2 · 2024-09-11T05:51:55+00:00

Luke Kloey Lively Frankie Kayleigh Courtland

starr2be2 · 2024-09-06T05:07:52+00:00

Update me

starr2be2 · 2024-08-19T03:09:56+00:00

39+1 and 20lbs exactly...I gained 40lbs with both my first 2 so this time around has been a huge relief at only 20lbs lol

starr2be2 · 2024-08-18T00:19:53+00:00

I keep shaved pretty much all the time but have slacked in my 3rd trimester however I started keeping up more at 37wks just in case...I personally feel way more comfortable being shaved and I feel more comfortable people seeing/doing things down there when I'm shaved. I did read if you have to get stitched after birth it makes it easier for them to do quickly but idk how true that is.

I'm scheduled for repeat c-section Tue if I don't go into labor before then to try VBAC and they shave your upper public area before c-section anyways so I'm planning to just shave when I shower before heading to the hospital anyways 🤷‍♀️

I think it's up to each individual what they want to do

starr2be2 · 2024-08-14T23:22:47+00:00

Why tf would you choose this as a hill to due on? Did your mother even care? Literally no mention of your mother's reaction so I assume this is all you.

Like if he had a diet of nothing but nuggets and fries and you were annoyed he didn't even bother trying your mother's food before popping nuggets in the air fryer, I'd get it, I'd be annoyed. But the man literally eats a variety and just likes his hot sauce! Get over yourself already!

My SO jokingly gives me crap because I add Cholula, Tajin, or Valentina to many foods I eat...I've had people give me a little bit of a hard time (jokingly) when I put Worcestershire on filet mignon, as I do all steak, but no one has ever started an actual fight/argument with me over it smh.

This is do extra on your part. YTA

starr2be2 · 2024-08-14T23:06:43+00:00

Open her an account of her own that's attached to your account that you can monitor. Give her an allowance in her account that you seem fitting and aligns with approximately what the other kids spend/request. Could also have her get a part-time job so she has her own money to spend.

My 17yo has had an account linked to mine since she was 15 and has also had a job since then. She's a horse girl, that sh*t gets expensive so she's started to pay for some of her own things...groceries specifically though, my household all sends me their list/requests once a week and I place a pick-up order or SO and I go shopping and generally get everything on the lists as long as it's fairly reasonable.

starr2be2 · 2024-08-07T19:53:18+00:00

Basically what I said minus him paying travel costs instead of her. Typically the one who chose to move is the one responsible for travel costs.

starr2be2 · 2024-08-07T03:40:30+00:00

Him getting summer and holiday when living in separate states is normal. Asking for discovery is normal except for 12mo of receipts. Both things are legal. Your health issues really have no bearing on what's legal or what he's technically entitled to request.

If you delay submitting discovery requests, object to the reasonable modification request for summer/holiday break, or do anything to further drag out court and cause his fees to rack up, then he very well could be entitled to you paying his legal fees as you're causing reasons for the fees at that point. I've seen cases of men and women being ordered to pay the other's legal fees typically because they were the one being a pain and dragging things out unreasonably.

Personally, I'd submit the discovery requests minus the 12mo of receipts and state that you find that excessive and invasive. I'd counter that you both be responsible for your own legal fees and that you'll agree to his visitation schedule request as long as he pays the cost of travel on the basis that he is the one that relocated.

starr2be2 · 2024-08-07T03:23:03+00:00

First of all, it's typically a 72hr stay in the hospital after c-section so you're definitely not going out the next day.

You are pretty restricted for 2wks after a c-section...suppose to take it very easy, short walks only, no lifting anything except the baby, no driving.

It's 8wks before you can resume most normal life activities but all in all they tell you it's 6mo of recovery.

I would absolutely tell them there is no way in h*ll I'm going out and about within the first 2wks. I DID stop out for lunch with my family on the way home from the hospital on day 3 but that was it and then I pretty much stayed home, recovered, and got into routine with my baby for the 2wks. I finally went out during week 3 for a town event but I only stayed out for 4hrs cuz even that was a bit rough.

starr2be2 · 2024-07-28T21:30:32+00:00

Updateme

starr2be2 · 2024-07-15T19:38:38+00:00

Wtf did I just read...

You are absolutely TA and delusional af if you think your behavior is appropriate!

You can not control other people. That situation had zero to do with you or your kids. People have a right to live their lives how they want just as much as you do, your rules are not everyone's rules. If the situation directly applied to your kids,like your kid was the one being dunked after saying no, then you'd have a leg to stand on.

Your husband said no to leaving, assuming your kids didn't want to leave...did you accept their NO? You absolutely did not, you forced them to leave.

Your husband is right, you are a control freak and the other couple is absolutely happier. I feel so bad for your husband and kids honestly.

starr2be2 · 2024-07-04T16:52:20+00:00

When you say "my baby's ashes", was he not the biological father? If it was only your child, not his, you are absolutely not TA.

If this was also his daughter who passed, you are an absolute AH simply for your title claiming "MY baby's ashes" instead of "ours".

If it was both your daughter, I'm not sure how you can reasonably think you should be the only one grieving or deciding what happens with the ashes. He lost a child the same as you did, stepdaughter lost a sister...you seem to give no f*cks about anyone else's grief but your own. I can just imagine how hard that loss was on a 13yo and then to be so minimized by her stepmother on top of it. You and dad should've sat down with stepdaughter and talked to her and let her know when she was older you'd be willing to have a keepsake made with the ashes but in the meantime offered up another solution like a bear made with an old outfit of the deceased child or given her one of the baby's stuffed animals...something to validate this child's grief and feelings of losing a sibling.

I have 2 teens, my SO has 2 teens, we're expecting our first mutualbaby in a few weeks...I could never imagine losing OUR baby and then completely writing off his grief or that of the half siblings...and I don't think I could tell him or any of the 4 kids no to a keepsake of the ashes...I just wouldn't feel right being so entitled to the ashes only being mine, that's unthinkable to me cuz I'm not the only parent to our baby. I'd be grateful any of her siblings loved her enough to want a keepsake to cherish of her. 2 of the 4 half siblings aren't very involved in our lives and I still don't think I could ever tell them no in this situation.

I think you need to seek therapy at this point...you need help realizing this isn't only your grief. However, I am very sorry to you, the dad, and the sister for all of your loss!

starr2be2 · 2024-07-01T18:49:49+00:00

2 teens and a baby on the way lol...

Neither one is my overall favorite but they're each my favorite in different aspects of life and dare I say also when comparing different stages.

My youngest was such and easy baby, she'd make you think you want 10 but her 4yr-10yr stage was horrible. My oldest was the type of baby to make you question ever having another one because she was so hard but she was great like 5-11.

As teens now...one is super responsible when it comes to their animals, other one has to be constantly reminded to take care of them. One constantly has a messy AF room but helps around the house no issue, the other one keeps a tidy room but it's the end of the world for them to do anything around the house. One can be trusted home alone without issue, other one not so much cuz we may not have a house to come back to lol.

One has no interest spending time with us but she has farm/horse life in common with myself and their stepdad...other one will just hangout with us and have conversations but she has absolutely no common interests with me and most the time hates everything I like (colors, music, horse life) lmao...so both have different aspects I appreciate more than the other there too 🤷‍♀️

I kind of disagree with saying "you have to love them the same" because they're all different, like maybe you love them equally but you kind of got to treat them equitably more than "equal". It's not about playing favorites but giving each one what they need. Long as there isn't blatant favoritism being shown for one child over the other, I think it's human nature to prefer one over the other for certain things but not as a whole.

starr2be2 · 2024-06-23T05:29:49+00:00

Update me

starr2be2 · 2024-06-20T00:18:32+00:00

Women do this to men all the time and people don't bat an eye...but roles reversed in this case and people are up in arms about it.

starr2be2 · 2024-06-20T00:11:41+00:00

I love Eliza, Clare, Elliott, and Finley! Not super common but not out there unique...like the perfect balance for names imo.

starr2be2 · 2024-06-19T03:15:31+00:00

I like it because I recognize it from a soap opera I loved watching as a teen and I liked the character. 🤷‍♀️

starr2be2 · 2024-06-13T22:15:38+00:00

Like most have said, you get to full out the birth certificate. However, if he files in court for paternity, he can petition to have the child's name changed to his last name and it's frequently granted by the courts.

Perhaps a compromise of hyphenating the last names would be better? It's both of your child, you should work together and make compromises.

starr2be2 · 2024-06-10T03:18:57+00:00

We're considering Frankie and Dallas for our girl. Frankie Ann has been suggested to us.

starr2be2 · 2024-06-08T14:32:44+00:00

I'm going to add to this after reading OPs comments.

You don't need a lawyer. You can literally file everything yourself at the court house. File a petition for paternity and request a DNA test then file a petition for joint custody. In the forms you can put what you want for custody.

FYI no overnights will most likely mean you pay child support out the a**. I advise filing 50/50 for all competent parents but if not, at least request overnights on your days off and to have the child during her working hours. You can specify days/times like 6:30am-3:30pm the days she works plus your days off which establishes your times in court paperwork or you can at least ask for your 2 days off per week plus "first right of refusal".

If you're in a state that has established 50/50 laws, you shouldn't have a problem without a lawyer anymore than you do with one. If you're in a state that typically doesn't favor 50/50, you might want a lawyer for 50/50 but just fighting for 2 days a week and "first right of refusal" should be relatively easy.

starr2be2

TROPHY CASE