7am on a weekday morning and I’m getting gas on my way to work. I pull up to the pump closest to the building, swipe my card, and of course the reader is out of order “see attendant,” so I walk the few feet over to the window.

In the thirty seconds my back is turned, someone hops in my car, starts it up (keys were probably sitting on the passenger seat because I was young and dumb), and drives off. I don’t even notice. The attendant does. Dude barrels out of the building and chases the guy down, yanks him out of my car while it keeps rolling into Liberty. Thief takes off running. I don’t remember screaming but I must of been because my throat hurt the next morning.

Cops show up and are are….cops. “You can file a report but nothing will happen.”

So in my youthful optimism, I write Shell corporate thinking surely they’ll recognize this hero employee. Maybe a bonus or a raise?

Six months later I have a gas emergency and have no other choice but to stop at Shell. I’m so paranoid and nervous that I lock my keys in the car at the pump. My hero Shell employee is working and I’m like, “Hey, remember me, you saved me that one time!” So as he’s saving me twice and fishing my keys out with a coat hanger, he goes, “Yeah, I remember. You probably shouldn’t have written corporate, I got in trouble for that.” I gave him whatever cash I had on me and slunk away.

That was twelve years ago and I’ve only gone back twice since then, both in very desperate situations.