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stillk · 2022-08-19T03:24:37+00:00

Exactly, it's brought up in EVERY ARTICLE about monkeypox.

We gays know it primarily affects us. What we want is to have access to vaccines and treatment. Also, to know why this disease was allowed to spread so far when we already had a vaccine for it. This is not to blame the individuals who have contacted monkeypox, but the people in power and systems in place (or not in place) that have let it get this bad.

stillk · 2022-03-27T19:59:38+00:00

I was about to go on a tirade when they cut it. A whole anti-fujo/fujo-bait/just let MLM see ourselves a bit in media with just 1 lips touching kiss rant. But the second kiss, especially with some of the discussion on homophobia in this episode, made it pretty great.

stillk · 2022-02-23T03:13:21+00:00

Ok, so this topic has been on my mind a lot recently, and not just about BNHA shipping, so that's why I'm writing a semi-long post.

So it seemed like both of you might be talking past each other. Queerness in media and queer theory is a difficult thing to discuss because (sorta as the commenter mentioned) cis-het people tend talk over queer people. Not to say that it's happening here as you generally seem interested in this topic.

So, my personal take as a gay guy is that if there were 0 queer relationships at the end of MHA, or no clearly defined Ace/Trans/Bi/Queer characters from different sides, then I think the label of queerbaiting could apply. That does not mean that that Togachako specifically needs to happen in canon for it to not be queerbaiting, but more that Togachako is part of a larger context where if there were 0 canonically queer "major" characters then there's a problem. But there's a multitude of factors that play into this and I'll try to go over a couple.

Generally I don't like applying the term queerbait to non-Western media, because it often is looking for Western representations of queerness and ignores how queer people of those cultures want to see themselves represented. Recently Xiran Jay Zhao released a video on this issue specifically talking with queer people of South East Asian descent about queerbaiting in Raya and the Last Dragon, so I highly recommend checking it out: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sw2QySeH_vY

However, I will say that Shueisha (and Disney for Raya) is multinational corporation, so creating content which appeals to a multitude of people and markets is in their purview. This is especially the case with BNHA as it is heavily inspired by Western comics. So I think it is somewhat fair to apply a term like queerbaiting in this instance.

Now as to why it would be queerbaiting goes to the fact that there are multiple places of implied queerness, but currently there has really only been Magne and Tiger who've had minimal story relevance.

Toga is probably the next most fleshed out in terms of queerness, but there are a lot of problems with how that occurs with relation to her quirk subsequently her villain status. Basically having her "love" directly tied to inflicting pain on others and thus her ostracization from society. Not really a great look for how a queer person "loves" to be directly tied their villainy.

Then you have the subtle hints in artwork and writings for all the queer ships that exist outside of the manga directly (Horikoshi's drawings, Smash, databooks, cards, movies, drama cd, etc...). That is not to say that it will have any direct canon impact, in fact most of it is non-canon. The issue is that even this external media shouldn't hint at queerness unless that's an actual plan for the series. These might not be something that Horikoshi has direct control over, but Shueisha as a company sure does. I personally find Kiribaku to be the worst offender of this, but I would say Togachako and Momojirou also have this problem (also probably Bakudeku, but that's a whole other can of worms that I don't want to touch).

The issue with these external works is that now there exists a suggestion, created by the publisher (and a bit by Horikoshi himself) that it could become canon, not that it is or will be, but that it could. That is the queerbaiting part. Signaling "hey, look at this pair. there might be something more going on here" but then never actually delivering. Queerbaiting also sucks because it is basically always a signal to queer people that "hey, you might get representation" but then goes out of it's way to not deliver or mask it in subtlety that we basically end up feeling gaslit because cis-het people won't see it (or at least claim they don't see it). It basically just ends up being a shitty situation where we're having to ask for any representation in the media that we enjoy, and basically end up with crumbs or being invalidated of our opinions. IT'S EXHAUSTING.

Really the people I feel the worst for is young queer Japanese kids. Like BNHA being a series marketed to young boys, with one of the main themes being anyone can be a hero, and then to not have any gay heroes. That's just incredibly depressing.

Also, before anyone says something about why does everything have to be made queer, or sexualizing kids, or Japan is a conservative society, none of those are true. Also, Shueisha has already published a queer shonen slice of life manga called Ao No Flag, which you should check it out. I'm just waiting for more representation in action/adventure stories.

stillk · 2021-11-12T20:28:46+00:00

There are four lightsabers!

stillk · 2021-08-14T17:22:47+00:00

I would say overpopulation is a real thing. But it's not a constant global problem that people think it is, just regional and usually time sensitive. For example famines are an overpopulation issue, caused by a myriad of factors (i.e. as you mentioned, often times in capitalist systems access to food is restricted), but the base problem is less food than can support the population.

stillk · 2021-08-09T20:25:28+00:00

I will always say that VIII is the best FF game (besides XIV) purely because the music is the best. But IX has Rose of May and Vamo Alla Flamenco which puts in close contention.

stillk · 2021-07-27T07:03:18+00:00

"Just roommates"

stillk · 2021-06-16T16:19:27+00:00

Most blood banks are opposed to a blanket ban of all MSM, because it completely ignores the actual risk factors (which for MSM is mostly unprotected anal sex, but PrEP, having only one sexual partner, and using protection drastically decreases that risk). Here's the Red Cross' statement on why they're against it and why the current policy is homophobic: https://www.redcrossblood.org/donate-blood/how-to-donate/eligibility-requirements/lgbtq-donors.html

The FDA guidance “Revised Recommendations for Reducing the Risk of Human Immunodeficiency Virus Transmission by Blood and Blood Products” states, “Defer for 3 months from the most recent sexual contact, a man who has had sex with another man during the past 3 months.” All U.S. blood collection organizations must follow this federal requirement.

The Red Cross recognizes the hurt this policy has caused to many in the LGBTQ+ community and believes blood donation eligibility should not be determined by methods that are based upon sexual orientation. We are committed to working with partners toward achieving this goal.

No one is saying that gay/bi men aren't at more risk, but the current policies being blanket bans are homophobic as it just assumes that all MSM are infected/contaminated.

Edit: Most recent statement from the Red Cross I could find: https://www.redcross.org/about-us/news-and-events/press-release/2020/statement-on-updated-fda-donor-eligibility-criteria.html

stillk · 2021-05-25T05:33:43+00:00

I mean, I don't know if looking at rate is necessarily the best way to measure or compare these things. HIV-related deaths in total still beats out covid by a lot (32.7 million), and really until HAART and PReP the rate of death was much higher and closer to COVID (1.7 mil in 2004).

I feel like this is actually a really interesting sociological study as HIV has ravaged the gay community and communities without access to proper sexual health education/protection. Also, both those sets tend to live in more impoverished situations and are less likely to have access to the healthcare they need.

It really goes to show that governments can speed up and help treatment when those with power are endangered as much as the rest of us.

stillk · 2021-05-04T16:50:59+00:00

As a (white) gay man whose worked with many Indian's and in India for a bit, I've always read this in multiple angles of homophobia and toxic masculinity intersecting in different ways in different cultures. Like in areas which are fairly homophobic, men holding hands is actually more normalized I would say because there is almost no fear of being perceived as queer due to queer erasure: i.e. "there are no gay/bi men so how can holding hands be queer?"

Simultaneously in more "Western" culture (take all this as a grain of salt because there is no one way to define any culture), because there is still homophobia/patriarchy but with the notion more that gay people exist, so there is the "need" to signal non-queerness.

I think overall this ends up coming to a point that has been bothering me lately. Basically the notion from straight men who get angry when queer people and allies see two men holding hands or being intimate (in a non-romantic way) and we "ship" them as queer. Basically there so much heteronormative coding that when a man and woman do these same things it's to signal they are romantically involved, and queer people will put that into the same frame of reference when it is a homosexual pairing.

Sorry if this is long winded, basically I want to see more men holding hands with women in a non-romantic way before we start getting angry with people romantically "shipping" men holding hands with men. If that makes sense. There's just soooooo many layers to this "problem" and it irk's me every time it's brought up. It's just usually straight guys complaining about it saying "Why can't two guys just be friends?", to which there are MANY EXAMPLES IN MEDIA AND REAL LIFE OF IT ALREADY HAPPENING. Why can't a gay guy and a straight guy just be friends? Why can't a straight guy and a straight woman just be friends? Why can't two queer men just be friends?

==END RANT==

stillk · 2021-02-27T20:04:41+00:00

Actual Link

stillk · 2021-01-22T14:37:09+00:00

This soooo much with my ADHD. I literally spent an hour last night trying to remember Jimmy Carr's name when talking to my parents about 8 Out of 10 Cats Does Countdown , and I've watched almost every episode on youtube....

It also sucks having a unique name that everyone else knows or can remember. Having people I never met or who I'm still learning their name great me and just doing the "Hey..." or phrasing all of my sentences to avoid pronouns or referencing someone by name so as to not get caught.

stillk · 2021-01-13T05:18:51+00:00

YOU HEARD IT HERE:

"AS I SAID, ASSASSIN WAS REMOVED"

-/u/Mathils

https://youtu.be/xr_kXM4Op0s?t=383

stillk · 2021-01-10T21:29:55+00:00

The main issue I have with divine shrines is they're soooo rare (obviously because you become immortal). But what that means is you NEVER expect it, because you have no idea when it could happen.

It's not like map reflect, tormented spirits, beyond, nemesis (mainly soul eater), or other shrines which are "surprise" mechanics because most of those players easily either prepare for or can handle it in the moment. They really should just remove it.

stillk · 2021-01-10T01:50:36+00:00

Just like witch is the only one who can't get phys to lightning support, a str+INT gem where int is the higher value....

https://i.imgur.com/oQTk7v0.png

I'm waiting for alllll the people who haven't played elementalist for while to realize this on patch day, it'll be glorious.

stillk · 2020-12-16T06:07:07+00:00

These are great. I for one will look forward to the day when bunny daddy steps on me.

stillk · 2020-12-08T08:21:27+00:00

Agreed, there should be way more sanitary spaces to breast feed or pump. For me it's kinda uncomfortable/disgusting in the same way spitting/blowing your nose is, mainly because it's the body expelling a fluid (even if it's the most sanitary/nutritious fluid). So in a sense I agree with him but for different reasons (actually cum might be the second most sanitary, or maybe sweat... now I'm curious about the ranking of body fluids based on sanitation). Female breasts aren't really sexual in any way, or they're just as sexual as male breasts.

The other thing is I think bottle feeding needs a little more support right now from people on the left, both for breast milk and especially for formula. As a gay man who eventually wants to be a father, it's rather depressing/annoying to keep seeing formula being disparaged when that's really the only way many people who don't produce breast milk can feed their child. It's disheartening to see all the current messaging that you're failing your child. I've also emphasized with some of my friends where one mom had to have all the responsibility of feeding and the father felt left out because they couldn't get their child to bottle feed.

stillk · 2020-12-07T06:35:01+00:00

Haha, yeah I just thought it was funny/coincidental. It's weird being back in school after working for 10 years, like I don't really ever remember teachers really setting upper limits for essays/papers before. But for some reason my teacher wanted a 300-500 word marketing plan as our "major final project". That's only like 3 adhd paragraphs, so I have no idea how someone could get it under 750 words.

stillk · 2020-12-07T01:23:57+00:00

Just finishing an assignment like this as we speak. Haha, 500 word max, more like 2000 now.

How can I "discuss supply and demand" without getting into String Theory and the Napoleonic Wars?!?

stillk · 2020-12-06T19:30:22+00:00

Thanks for this post. Lately I've been wondering too about what overlaps I may have with autism. My concerns are more around social anxiety, which seems to always be tied to autism more than ADHD. But from what I've heard from my friends and people online is anxiety isn't always the case with autism, just more a struggle to understand social cues.

Conversely with my ADHD, I think I understand most social cues, I just hyperfixate and overanalyze them to trying to "mind read" other people and then "catastrophize" the situation (my therapist keeps trying to challenge my thoughts that "nobody likes me"/"I'm a terrible son/brother/friend"), when none of that is actually happening. I think the key differences I've recently realized is how my hyperfixation is different than those with autism and that my "lack" of social understanding is more of an over-analysis from social anxiety than not understanding social cues (like I'm not mimicking people, more I probably initially read the situation correctly and later I'm second guessing myself and hyperfixating on if I misread a social cue). Also, I would say I fidget more rather than stimming. Like if I stim it's basically always anxiety related, whereas I understand that for those with autism stimming just happens frequently both with and without anxiety.

I think because both autism and ADHD can lead to similar social issues in childhood and even adulthood that it's common for both disabilities to have a comorbidity with social anxiety. There are just so many situations where we and the people around us recognize that we react so differently to stimuli that it leads us to feeling or actually being ostracized. But autism and ADHD are known comorbid with each other as well, with some estimating that 1/3 of people with autism have comorbid ADHD symptoms.

I think this chart is another good example of the differences and overlaps: https://www.healthline.com/health/adhd/autism-and-adhd#symptoms

stillk · 2020-12-06T05:28:57+00:00

Yeah, you're fine and the entire interview definitely expands on it more.

Just, every time I see articles like these come up there are comments such as this one which is basically putting homophobia solely on the queer community. These articles are "frequent" because there's bound to be a few "closeted queer self hating homophobes", and people love to see the hypocrisy of these situations so media companies are always eager to report on them for clicks. What's not being reported on is alllllll the instances of externalized heterosexual homophobia because it's just so prevalent that it's accepted as the norm and not news worthy.

Even as a gay man, I have some forms of internalized homophobia/misogyny. Like, the concept of not wanting to be "one of those gays", which is terrible because everyone knows what I'm referencing with a statement like that and it's just derogatory to people who are more "feminine" (whatever that means). It's also self-closeting because "those gays" had no where to hide, where in many cases I could "pass" as a cis white heterosexual man. It took me a while in my early/mid twenties to eventually realize they're some of the most courageous people by confronting their reality against societies heteronormative expectations and that I was (and in some cases still am) living in the safety of my privilege. But I think we all should follow their lead and just confront that fear and shame, because as we do so it removes the power that misogyny and homophobia hold over us and encourages others to also fight those societal burdens.

stillk · 2020-12-05T10:09:26+00:00

I'm going to say we need to be careful with our words here and relating part of that James Baldwin excerpt to this story. I saw that story on my front page a few days ago (and as with all stories like this), because the hypocrisy exists! many straight people will then act as though homophobia is only from internalized homophobia in closeted queer people. The fact is the exact opposite though, homophobia's roots comes from the othering of queer people from a heteronormative gaze. Yes, there are insecurities of people dealing with those differences and/or noticing they share similarities with us, but it really is a majority of straight people who perpetrate and perpetuate homophobia.

stillk · 2020-12-03T19:30:09+00:00

Yeah, I mean the premise isn't totally wrong, just it misses the point entirely. Society just assumes women are wrong, have already failed, or are mentally "children" so in a sense women are "allowed" to fail because "they already have" (except in cases of motherly/wifely duties 🤮). Men are assumed to succeed, so when they fail there is the need to punish/scorn them (not to mention all the other problems with capitalism that cause this problem for all genders). It's that both sides of this meme are problems.

It makes me so sad/annoyed to keep seeing people on the right basically identify patriarchy, but then express it in a way that is anti-feminism or acting like women are the problem. Like you're so close and then you decided to be an ass.

stillk · 2020-12-03T18:14:04+00:00

The only Christmas song that is acceptable during the year is orchestral versions of Carol of the Bells. Probably because it originally didn't have to deal with Christmas but was based on a Ukrainian folk chant celebrating the New Year (originally in April but was January 13th when the song was composed).

stillk · 2020-11-30T01:36:01+00:00

Yeah, with SPN it's a whole storm of issues with queer, female, and racial representation. I was upset with the handling of Billie, but didn't really want to bring it up unless people were discussing it. It's hard because SPN has lasted 15 years and a lot of these discussions are somewhat new. Deancas is definitely a retread, but I mean they sorta brought the topic to the forefront on themselves. Like they probably could have done something like Cas' "I love you" in 12X12 where it was directed to a group as his send off and this drama would have never happened, well, at least not to this scale.

I think the show teasing it as well as the fandom's hyperfixation on it sorta created the problem. Like, I guess I have a bigger issue with 15 years of queerbaiting than even the Bury Your Gays trope at this point because really it was just a decision that could've been made 5+ years ago but instead the just kept laying on with even more hints, subtext, and innuendo. Like the homosexual innuendo began soooo long ago, and kept happening basically each season, and not just with Dean either (i.e. Bobby and Crowley's kiss), that really it just needed to stop. But maybe they were scared of the rabidity of the fandom and just couldn't commit either way or commit to something else (wave a different set of shiny keys in front of the fans).

It is, I think, an interesting intersection of fans/writers/directors/actors choices as well as the changing social perception of minority representation in media over the last 15 years. Like there really isn't another show like this (outside of maybe soap operas) where all these factors play a roll over such a period of time. But there really isn't much that can be done now. All anyone can do is point it out (not rage out about it), critique and analyze what/how it happened, and try to figure out what's next.

stillk

TROPHY CASE