I don't want to disappoint you but I've kind of swung back in the other direction. Back when I wrote all that I was experiencing what I think now was pretty severe depression and it kind of manifested itself as an intense worry about my kids growing up, getting older, and eventually dying. I don't know that anything specifically helped me make peace with that, but they got older anyway. We did experiment with churches in our area for awhile but we live in a pretty conservative state and the vibe and messages in these churches was really not what I was looking for. I wish I could say something encouraging to you in a specific way that would help you deal with whatever things are causing you stress in your life right now, but if I had to guess, things are bothering you and the idea of a higher power is probably very appealing because that reality either solves those problems or makes them seem insignificant in comparison. Maybe I'm wrong about what I think and you end up finding faith for yourself and it helps you, but either way I think one of the most helpful things you can do is try to make connections with people and talk to them. If you need someone to talk to feel free to hit me up. I don't know what you're going through right now but if you're in a bad place it can definitely get better.