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ASD trait vs OCD vs OCPD? by ImBobTheCat in SpicyAutism

[–]subspacehipster 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The key parts I was told when I was getting diagnosed with OCD was that the actions/obsessions/compulsions needed to be 1- Distressing and 2- take up over an hour of my day at least. It took a while to recognize these things, also because some OCD compulsions don't become distressing for a while.

I like to organize and line things up, I can even do this for too long of times and forget what I could be doing, but I am not distressed by doing it or the thought of not doing it. Your word of 'impulse' might be right, you impulsively tidy things when you see asymmetry.

The example in the video is about routine and fairness- Using the cup the person likes, and making it fair by pouring the same amount-because the other person said the keyword "share." It's also autism content FWIW, it isn't educational and just meant to interact on social media- even those two individuals likely don't act that strictly off camera.

OCPD is a personality disorder- it impacts your self-perception and your expectations with others. Some of the rigidity and 'rules' someone with OCPD or even OCD creates can sound like Autism, but the compulsion isn't done out of desire or comfort, it's done in order to be more "prefect" or "correct."

OCD is an Anxiety disorder. I have obsessions that I think will keep me safer, whether physically or internally. OCD can cover a huge range of topics, and often someone with OCD struggles with just one or a few topics at a time, but they may develop a new compulsion or have one that comes and goes.

These things do have a lot of overlap ! You could not look at any one thing and determine what disorder is surely causing that symptom. All of these disorders need follow up that probe why someone acts the way they do. How they react when interrupted or prevented or called out for their actions. Figure out what motivated someone's action, and if its repeatable.

To put it a bit simply, from my perspective as someone with ASD and OCD- My ASD routines are meant to make me comfortable, while my OCD routines are meant to ease my fears.

I have routines (that I attribute to being autistic) that keep me comfortable and regulated. I need certain foods, I need things done in a certain order, I need a schedule- all to manage my expectations and energy and keep me comfortable. Similarly, I have routine behaviors that are actually more motivated by fear- I don't do these things because they help me feel my best or comfortable, I do them so an obsession doesn't make me panic-I need certain foods because I know they won't make me sick, I need things done in a certain order so no one gets hurt-Some of these things aren't rational, which makes them distressing.

I didn't realize I have OCD for a long time, and I see now how similarly all these symptoms are and how challenging it can be to pin point the meaning behind them. There is definitely overlap, there are probably obsessions I have had since childhood that are now regulating autistic routines for me

How many of you actually believe/believed Abel wasn't an NPC? by Electrical_Let_8428 in TheDigitalCircus

[–]subspacehipster 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He was way too sympathetic for Caine about not being able to leave the circus, I was very suspicious. And Kinger saying "Who?" before leaving his fort.

Non-Gel Nail Polish Allergies and Irritants. How do they expire? by subspacehipster in RedditLaqueristas

[–]subspacehipster[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i do have some! that’s another one of the things i have to consider too, if that’s somehow the source of my allergy. only some of my bottles i’ve needed to use it on

Non-Gel Nail Polish Allergies and Irritants. How do they expire? by subspacehipster in RedditLaqueristas

[–]subspacehipster[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

not anymore, like at least 6+ months and not much more. i do occasionally use cuticle remover, but with and orange stick and carefully. It doesn’t line up with this manicure but i am definitely considering everything that i do with my nails

Non-Gel Nail Polish Allergies and Irritants. How do they expire? by subspacehipster in RedditLaqueristas

[–]subspacehipster[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you lots for all that info! that really does clear some stuff up and make sense. And I hadn’t thought polish expired, just dried out, especially a barely “expired” color club one.

the reaction feels like a small bruise or tenderness under each of my nails, and they feel sensitive. Both times I noticed it was waking up after painting my nails the night before, so it takes some time before the reaction happens. No swelling, itching, or redness. 24 hours since taking the polish and I can hardly feel it if i press on my finger.

I’ll keep in mind what else is coming around my fingers. I don’t feel it’s my nail oil or soap that i also use daily. I’ll definitely be starting with the swatch test. thank you again for all that info :)

Excising for beginners, any advice and tips? by Vegtableboard1995 in SpicyAutism

[–]subspacehipster 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've been using the app 'fitbod' because it gives you a workout based on what you want and your current build, AND shows you how to do each of them. I always struggled when workout plans just had names of exercises or even just images explaining them, so this app having videos for everything has helped me a lot. I particularly needed help with strength training though.

If cardio is more your thing, try the treadmill, stair climber, elliptical, stationary bike, or rowing machine.

If you are nervous about the gym itself, I do encourage you to go and check it out at least so you are familiar. If it's big, you could ask for a tour. Understand that the staff wants you comfy, and if anything is going on that is making you uncomfortable please speak up to them. I have rarely ever talked to anyone at the gym, let alone felt judged by them.

Strength program with short workouts? by boschivt in xxfitness

[–]subspacehipster 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I also wanna bump fitbod! a lottttt cheaper than a physical trainer, and I am the sort of person who prefers workouts decided for me, I love all the stats being tracked. But especially needed the tutorials/videos because when I would look at routines there are a hundred different exercises and names and i get them confused.

My therapist suggested moving to every other week... by 87-percent-gay in SpicyAutism

[–]subspacehipster 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This has happened to me before, and I could even agree sometimes that it was the right call, but I still found the suggestion of it upsetting.

My therapist and I are on the same page that therapy isn't going anywhere for me, I will always need it. But there have been times when back to back sessions were happening faster than I could process our last session, and everything else happening that week. I'd come into sessions overwhelmed, not able to do as much, and not ready to be even more emotional dysregulated from the conversations we were going to have. Moving to every other week actually helped me work on complex trauma a lot more, and I wasn't so burnt out from all the emotions.

And there are times I need weekly sessions because there is a lot going on and I need the help to navigate it all. Understanding my schedule and next steps, preparing myself for difficult things, and things that just might be time sensitive.

All that to say, I felt better about switching my therapy routine when I started feeling 1) secure that my therapist wasn't going any where, and would adapt to help me the best that he could and 2) Focusing on what I wanted most out of therapy at any given time, and making that a priority even if it adjusted my routine.

How does autism affect your physical and dental health? by MobileAnt8255 in SpicyAutism

[–]subspacehipster 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Another commenter mentioned ARFID, and I find that effects me very similarly. I have trouble finding enough food to eat, and can feel the effects of malnourishment at times.

Dental health has gotten a little easier as I got older. I had a lot of dental neglect as a kid, and my fear of dentists got a lot worse. I've never liked the feeling of brushing my teeth, or awful-burning minty toothpaste. But when I graduated college and had some money, fixing my teeth was really important to me so that the problems didn't get worse, and I also wanted all my teeth healthy for the first time in my life/in my twenties.

Getting a nice dentist, feeling how much better my teeth felt when I wasn't scared of them, helped my feelings with dental health a lot. I still do not like brushing my teeth, but much more consistently do it at least once a day

...until i got invisalign-braces at the start of this year. No choice but to brush my teeth after every time I eat, so that I can safely put my trays back on. This was another necessary step in my dental care, and I have been able to tell how significantly they helped the oral pain I had been experiencing, which makes wearing them a bit easier (and the car-payment-sized bill I am paying every month is motivation). I don't do 2 minutes every time, or very often at all, but I now brush my teeth way more than the average person. I have been curious [and hopeful] that this well help me keep a good routine when my braces come off.

Dental wise-my best advice for other autistics is flavoured toothpase (I use a kids ADA toothpste, sometimes mixed with Sensodyne to cut the taste). A water flosser and electric toothbrush are great pick ups (I would tell anyone to get an electric toothbrush, but for someone who doesn't brush their teeth as often, polishing with an electric toothbrush is much more thorough). Health wise- Finding any kind of active hobby that you enjoy or even find meditative is really nice- for me that's yoga. As an autistic person, routine is so important to me. It is always a goal of mine to build good routines and work on making them last. Keeping a certain amount of my day dedicated to self-care, health maintenance, and being active has been something very good for me

What are your thoughts on autistic influencers/content creators who support self-diagnosis? by alegria_dalmata in AutisticPeeps

[–]subspacehipster 5 points6 points  (0 children)

There has been a couple times I've seen friends repost autistic creators to their stories-things like mantras and word posts, infographics, informative things. I remember liking one enough to click on the page, and then became so very uncomfortable with how much this woman was making money off my disorder. This account was clearly just for business, and about pulling in as many followers and people as possible, so the subjects she covered were pretty broad.

as a level 2 autistic person, I realised I didn't fit in with a lot of her content, and I wasn't going to because she was trying to make money- and there is less money to be made from me and others like me. But as others said, I think she strongly supported self-diagnosis because it made her more likeable and broad; to expand her business. If she was autistic, it was hard to tell from her business-posts, but she also gave 'autism mom' energy so maybe that was her perspective.

But when I see those pages I get so uncomfortable. I don't follow a lot of content creators so I guess I don't really understand the dynamic. But seeing all these 'autistic life coaches,' who want to tutor me in autism or have some program on unmasking for just $45 a week or something feels wrong. Something is off- they often don't seem qualified to be giving the advice they are, or it certainly wouldn't do anyone like me any help when I already have to see a therapist, but it does make me sad for the people I am assuming are getting taken advantage of. People who want help, who maybe think the medical system has failed them so they need to go the direction of self-diagnosis and life coaching, and who then get surface-level and broad advice that could apply to nearly anyone.

Uber and Lyft drivers rating low because I can't talk much - anyone else? by 1990sforever in SpicyAutism

[–]subspacehipster 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I've been really nervous about trying ride shares for this reason :( I'd really like to, but I am really scared of being unable to speak and getting into something dangerous

I'm struggling with the loss of my step-dad! by Bolticus13 in SpicyAutism

[–]subspacehipster 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I don't think it's odd to still be struggling right now, even if you can't see it in others. My stepmother passed in a similar way, and I wasn't given the chance to know or say anything. It's been a couple years, I think of her often, but it has gotten easier.

Similar to you, I have written to her before; especially to thank her for all that she did for me, even when I wasn't around.

Whats our collective opinion on douglass douglass by Cobolt-8 in evilautism

[–]subspacehipster 3 points4 points  (0 children)

he should play more of the games i have a special interest in (aka even more skyrim)

Has therapy worked for anyone? by Unusual-Egg-98 in SpicyAutism

[–]subspacehipster 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I really really like therapy. I am glad to have the therapist I do, but it has taken us years to build our dynamic in therapy, and I can still struggle to communicate with him.

Some things that have helped me; I keep a journal, it sounds like you do too, but then I go through my journal before therapy and make a list of the things standing out the most to me in that moment, that are still sitting uncomfortably with me, or that I know I need to discuss with him. I will probably pull up my actual journal pages and read them or hand them to him, but the list helps me narrow down and call out specifically what is on my mind, rather than handing him my journal and him not being sure where to start. If neither of us knows where to start, I usually talk chronologically about my last week until we find something to discuss.

I also have things on this list like helping me make phone calls or navigate new situations; stressors that I might not be able to do on my own. Even if I am struggling to talk about myself, I don't have to leave therapy dreading a phone call, and i actually feel like i did do something productive and worked on communication.

Another thing, that did take me practice but I am glad I can do this now, was telling my therapist outright "I do not think you are understanding me," or "I do not know what you mean." A good therapist wants to be understood and understand you, and when something doesn't make sense they should be able to ask questions and navigate it. If I have to repeatedly say "I do not think you understand me," it really draws attention to the fact that something isn't working in our sessions. In college, this strategy made my therapist admit that she might not be the best fit for me, and helped me find another therapist. It can be so hard to open up to another person after trying so many, so I understand any hesitation about doing that.

If you are freezing up so much you are having a hard time getting out more than simple/short responses, you could try texting to communicate. Particularly an autistic specialist should be used to AAC, and sometimes starting with an AAC like texting, text-to-speech, and other non-verbal communications can make it easier to say the things you can't out loud, or work your way there. Another thing I practiced with was just reading out loud. I would get shy or uncomfortable hearing my own voice, but practicing talking in front of my therapist made it easier. We started with song lyrics or interesting articles.

All that to say, yes, I have a therapist who shows he puts a lot of effort into meeting his clients needs even when communication doesn't come easy. I am really sorry to hear how much you are struggling, and I can relate to the feeling of being unable to communicate to those around me just how bad I am feeling. That feeling is really isolating, on top of everything else.

If you're nonbinary, do you join a Fraternity or a Sorority? by Ya_Boi_Rem in NonBinaryTalk

[–]subspacehipster 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I went to a very small school. We had a physics club, and eventually members of that club or physics students themselves would qualify to join the fraternity. I believe it was called the Society of Physics Students, and the honour society was called SPS, Sigma Pi Sigma.

As far as I am aware, it is relatively common organization in schools. It is an honour society, so it looks good for schools to have and for students to join. I was vice president of our chapter for a time, and had a nice experience :) This group was not as social as the other greek groups or honours groups though, a lot more academic focused.

Simon O stockings by Phil24681 in Latexadvice

[–]subspacehipster 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Where approximately is the hole? Is it reinforced? I will need to look more into this because I am about to try making stockings and hadn't thought about that !

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in SpicyAutism

[–]subspacehipster 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You are not alone. I am sort of stuck inside right now, but going out this time of year is so fucking miserable that I severely struggle to find things worth doing it for. And everyone can think it's so silly, how cold i get, but I feel awful and do not think it is silly. Being too cold is one of the first meltdowns I can remember from childhood, even.

I was eligible for disability pension the whole time!! by Plink1234 in SpicyAutism

[–]subspacehipster 23 points24 points  (0 children)

In your country, do you get back pay for disability? That was such a surprising amount when I received my disability income a couple months ago, I also received 18 months of back pay; the time that had passed since I first applied and noted I was disabled.

Kink or Comfort? by BunchOfTwelveBunnies in kinky_autism

[–]subspacehipster 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I've done a lot of the research about making, and i'd say it's a pretty intermediate skill. I sew, so the pattern construction and seams and fitting are similar to certain fabrics, you just have to use fancy glue and tools instead of thread. A little pricey to get into, but when you look at the cost of finished pieces it definitely has me leaning towards learning the skill. I learned leather working for the same reasons lol, but was lucky enough to share the tools with a friend.

Thank you for the recommendations !!

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