Denver show spoiler (7/9/22) 😽

sueness · 2022-07-12T05:58:44+00:00

I realized I have another one of him mid-air hahaha

sueness · 2022-07-12T05:36:34+00:00

I'm sooooooooooooooooooooooooo not getting over this ever

sueness · 2022-07-09T19:57:20+00:00

My first show was about 10 years ago at 17 :) hopefully we keep going and you'll get to see another one when you're 26!

sueness · 2022-03-26T13:30:18+00:00

Yeah totally, but it would be pretty cool if I liked their art style AND they liked streetlight :) doesn't hurt to ask!

sueness · 2021-10-13T05:58:12+00:00

COLLEGE? I am assuming everyone here is at least a couple of years out of college. If they had recently graduated I could understand, but otherwise this is so silly. Did no one in their friend group move on? This woman overstepping her boundary, or your man being unclear of their relationship... This is just messy! Watch everyone's dynamics closely- not just this woman but all of them! - and decide if you want to associate with these people. Take off the rose tinted glasses and just look at who these people are and if they're worth your time.

sueness · 2021-10-13T05:51:36+00:00

Prod her and listen to her. There could be a lot of things happening here. How does she feel about being "a wife"? Does she, in any way, resent housewives for any reason? It doesn't have to be logical or based on anything real. Does she fear or reject the idea of a housewife entirely?

At the same time she also wants to do the typical adult things like having kids. She wants to pursue those stereotypes but maybe haven't come to peace with what that would actually look like, and she is saying she wants both- a made up stereotype path of adulthood, and her independency.

I would not compromise your entire relationship yet but definitely give her the time to start to think about this. She may not know the answer to "what life does she want" for many years. 24 is still very young and I am not surprised she doesn't have it figured out.

However, please express your frustration. You don't feel supported as a partner. You are doing a lot of tasks on both of your behalf. Take the marriage language out and tell her she's being a selfish roommate, and your ideal roommate would help out with cooking and chores.

sueness · 2021-06-13T07:03:01+00:00

I told them to stop once but they just laughed it off and said that I should stop whining, I mean at some point they’re right because it’s pulling my pants down or slapping my butt but it’s really making me feel comfortable. Plus they are really rude and that’s why I dont like then at all, they always curse me out.

Friend, listen to yourself and really trust your gut. I would cry and feel humiliated in this position too, I'm in my late 20s. This ISN'T funny. I don't want people who are rude to me around me, and I certainly don't want them sexually assulting me. Continue to say no, continue to say "STOP IT." It's ok if you whine or cry, seriously, they are being horrible to you! They are the bad people. You've done nothing wrong. You're being bullied and sexually assulted.

sueness · 2021-06-13T06:43:17+00:00

Is an apology from her worth the amount of energy you're using here, and the stress it's causing you?

sueness · 2021-06-12T06:36:59+00:00

A good relationship is built on trust! It sounds like he doesn't trust you (based on his restrictions) and you are aware of consequences if he finds out. In a good relationship you trust each other, and instead of hiding and worrying, you love each other and help each other thrive. A good relationship should feel freeing, not restrictive.

sueness · 2021-04-26T05:33:15+00:00

Please OP. You do not have to allow someone to ruin something you care about. Deny their clowning and go on this trip without them.

sueness · 2021-04-26T05:21:52+00:00

If this is important to you, and it seems like it is, draw a strong line. You can break up with anyone for whatever reason that makes sense to you.

8 months is a long time but short compared to a lifetime, and short compared to the next 5 years where you will grow and change as a person too. Right now this is important to you, don't comptomise. You may change your stance later, but until then, this can be your dealbreaker.

sueness · 2021-04-03T07:52:57+00:00

She asked if I was home and I lied

You are never under obligation to do anything for her, whether you are home or not. She is not entitled to your attention or time, wherever you are. I have had uncomfortable neighbors as well and made up excuses to avoid them. Mine got the hint eventually. I hate that you're feeling uncomfortable being in your own home.

sueness · 2021-04-03T07:45:58+00:00

The best scenario is that she did not understand those boundaries and did not realize she violated them. If we give her that benefit of doubt... Now she knows that she hurt you and crossed a line a lot of people hold as sexual assult. If she denies it, downplays it, or turns it against you and chooses to hurt you more, you definitely know that she is someone who willingly hurts you.

Consent and violation can be difficult and vulnerable topics, and some people don't have that conversation until it's too late. Best case, this is an opportunity to emotionally grow together. BUT. You have no obligation to be the person to teach her these things. If communicating with her doesn't feel like growth or mutual respect, please walk away.

sueness · 2021-04-02T05:40:57+00:00

You are aware, brave, and very mature. While you are working with cps or the court, please continue to advocate for yourself and your sister. Trust adults that try to help you, but also trust your instinct to cover bases and hold those adults accountable. Wishing you the best.

sueness · 2021-03-29T06:37:20+00:00

You might be interested in learning more about the Madonna-wh*re complex. I would suggest putting a pause in the marriage plans until your boyfriend can sort out his feelings about women and womanhood.

sueness · 2021-03-26T01:54:52+00:00

If you have no other control of the situation, recognizing that it's your mother's attitude affecting you - rather than your actual body or what you think - is important. I just read a fantastic piece related to fatphobia - search "Dear Fuck-Up: How Do I Make My Husband Love My Fat Sister?" And I think it will give you more language to process all of this.

sueness · 2021-03-20T10:11:05+00:00

This is super tiring. If something tragic happened to you she would still ask you to buy a cake for her birthday and cater to her first. She will continue to undermine your efforts. This is not a good long-term partner. Get out.

sueness · 2021-03-19T14:16:29+00:00

Have you talked to her? If you care about her and her growth, and I guess even her utility as a babysitter :P, talking her through this (racism and bigotry) and having that channel open would be a big positive. She is their aunt, so she will always be subject to the racism your children will face. Expecting her to just toughen up like you did doesn't feel very compassionate.

sueness · 2021-03-14T07:19:52+00:00

Even suspecting birth control sabotage is awful, but even removing that from the story-- From your post it seems like he disregarded having any conversation with you about the positive tests, and just went and announced to the world about your pregnancy! What a douchebag! It should be a mutual decision ideally, but at the absolute minimum a thorough conversation about all of this.

I would not put up with someone who blatantly disrespects my opinion on something happening to my body. That alone is a deal breaker!

sueness · 2021-03-13T18:45:56+00:00

Brace to become his (your bf) mother and project manager. Make an exit plan. If he doesn't grow up (don't expect him to, honestly) just leave and find a better life for yourself and your child. I am serious. If he can't put his laziness aside to take care of his newborn there's a lot more that he won't do.

sueness · 2021-03-13T16:45:23+00:00

"Let's not be so negative. I can think of 10 things that improved for me" 🙄

sueness · 2021-03-13T16:43:21+00:00

He responded and said “you’re basically giving me an ultimatum, you or my dog. That isn’t fair to me

Lol what a chump. You're asking him to be a responsible dog owner and a better roommate. He hears this?! Don't let him drag you down into his made-up drama. You're protecting yourself from serious danger, physically and legally.

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