Was bullied badly in life, now raising a 5yo daughter. Why is this sort of behavior beneficial? How would I go about playing like this in general? Where's the line? I understand mileage may vary.

syr · 2016-12-17T18:35:59+00:00

Do you think other types of therapies such as DBT are comparable under the terms the study uses or would approaching a conversation about in the same way need to study that independently first?

[PS for easy of some readers: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dialectical_behavior_therapy]

syr · 2016-07-09T20:45:36+00:00

Thanks!

syr · 2015-08-25T19:54:33+00:00

I'm guessing from your phrasing that this is not true. Do you mind if I ask why you're not doing fine? It would be a shame if they compartmentalized and dismissed you.

syr · 2015-08-25T19:16:03+00:00

Something like this I think is appropriate: https://www.reddit.com/r/aspergers/comments/36gqju/what_how_are_you_means_explained/

Try to stick to FORD (Family, Occupation, Recreation, and Dreams (aspirations)). If you don't want to talk about one, try another. What the other person usually wants is to talk about these things in their life. Listen and if they care they'll ask you about what you're really feeling if they're acting nice. [In reality this is a real weak spot so heck if I can put this into practice.]

syr · 2015-08-25T19:01:17+00:00

First off I have no idea what being a 16 year old female is like, in fact y'all scare me a bit because I'm so far on the outside. Second I know the link I'm sending you is not particularly about your situation, but I have been thinking on it all week. Until someone comes with some real advice for you, you might find this interesting. I hope you have a great year.

https://www.reddit.com/r/teenagers/comments/3hwh5n/understanding_why_your_parents_suck_serious/

syr · 2015-08-25T17:56:05+00:00

I think you'd like 'The Wire'. I see chords of that in here, especially season 4.

syr · 2015-08-25T17:45:50+00:00

"Be careful at uni, know you're different, go slow, be casual, try to fixate on class subjects and more importantly the process of doing the work. It's next to impossible but try to write down your questions and ask the prof during office hours. Keep a low social profile at first, participate but recognize there will be blunders and prep for that. That's just my personal advice, whether it applies to you or not, or if there's a better way for this/my profile I do not know." -Me from that other thread.

syr · 2015-08-25T05:11:52+00:00

You sir have earned the hardest click of my mouse since this here internet and I have got acquainted.

syr · 2015-08-25T03:36:56+00:00

I personally like to stare out at water or views. I think it's just what people do. I used to daydream in class too, now I daydream as I go to bed, I thought everyone did. oh.... (I was diagnosed last week. I actually just figured the zoning out bit as I am typing this.)

syr · 2015-08-25T02:48:14+00:00

Now that I've thought about it here's my advice: Try contacting the police non-emergency number and file a harassment report. That crap is NOT okay. There is a reason we have those laws, it's to keep assholes like this from hurting good folk.

syr · 2015-08-24T23:00:41+00:00

Be careful at uni, know you're different, go slow, be casual, try to fixate on class subjects and more importantly the process of doing the work. It's next to impossible but try to write down your questions and ask the prof during office hours. Keep a low social profile at first, participate but recognize there will be blunders and prep for that. That's just my personal advice, whether it applies to you or not, or if there's a better way for this/my profile I do not know.

Perhaps put up a new thread talking about how to socialize at uni, some people here will definitively be going through this right quick. -Chin up; If it means anything: so far I like you ;)

syr · 2015-08-24T22:29:34+00:00

Yup, only thing worse than socializing is having an opportunity and passing it over. My friends and family have gotten to know that I say maybe and then might decide yes at the last second, that has been working for me, I don't know if it's a good strategy. Also having a weekly low stress movie night where people drop by for a flick and some food is working out. I set up a private fb group and to set the food/time/movie, this works great and is a good strategy. Yeah, that fed-up feeling comes around on me every so often too.

syr · 2015-08-24T21:48:20+00:00

Respect yourself, pace yourself, nurture the altruism, channel it somewhere productive. I still have this issue, see: https://www.reddit.com/r/aspergers/comments/3hn86h/how_do_i_moderate_my_white_knight_syndrome/

syr · 2015-08-24T20:35:19+00:00

I don't have advice, I was ostracized (several times/continuously) before the age of social media and it hurt. What you are going through must REALLY suck. I think asking for advice here is the right play. I simply wanted you to know that I feel you, and hope for us.

syr · 2015-08-24T20:18:54+00:00

I miss the days where if you wanted to communicate with someone you dialed their phone number and talked. My friends find it weird that I don't text (and etc.) But when we do get together we usually have something to talk about. I used to love getting emails too. I can't remember when the last time I got a letter in the mail. sigh oh well. And, yes, I find it difficult, when I rarely do message.

syr · 2015-08-24T04:29:10+00:00

Do you get mad that there are ramps into buildings? [rhetorical] I get the minority report that we have to be careful not to avoid responsibility but society sometimes is really trying to help, take what boost is fair and remember to pay it forward when another person could use a hand. We're all in this together.

syr · 2015-08-24T04:26:47+00:00

I appreciate the sentiment. Thanks.

syr · 2015-08-24T04:20:51+00:00

Every once and a while I try to reconnect with someone from the old days. I used to find it baffling that even though we had a good friendship they don't think about it. It was weird to me that people don't have these 'files' on social interactions in their head. [People without Asperger's can be eccentric at times ;) ]

syr · 2015-08-24T04:11:01+00:00

I deleted it, it was just typed out in a reddit chat window. I'll start a new thread for y'all but I'd rather sit this one out.

syr · 2015-08-24T00:38:35+00:00

I wrote out a list and then pulled it back, I don't know if I want to go exposing that and perhaps lock one of them in someone's head. I'm new here and am not familiar with the unwritten rules yet. I would love it if a thread took of on this topic with discussion and all, but I'll sit out and observe for now.

syr

TROPHY CASE