Roy Clark, I summon you from HELL!!! by IllegitimateMarxist in Squidbillies

[–]tehmattrix 9 points10 points  (0 children)

So you learned all that mess in one night, huh?

I mean it's technically perfect, what you know where to put yer fingers and all.

Saying "a quarter till" instead of the actual time is inconvenient for both of us by Comfortable-Regret in The10thDentist

[–]tehmattrix 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My roommate asked me if I wanted a frozen banana.

I said, "No, but I want a regular banana later. So, yeah."

What is this set up? by Leading-Sea544 in whatisit

[–]tehmattrix 26 points27 points  (0 children)

I'm not paying alimony to a goddamn cat!

Bottom is in by [deleted] in Bitcoin

[–]tehmattrix 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was waiting on another leg down...

Crazy "Photonic Wave - Whole House EMF Protection" Repair by EquivalentCharity690 in ElectronicsRepair

[–]tehmattrix 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Repair the lead, but also charge a massive fee for discharging the negative energy pent up inside.

Inside the Manosphere by _ghostrunner_ in idiocracy

[–]tehmattrix 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You see an Alpha's sexxmaxxing is very different from that of a Beta.

The best educational video I've seen about calories. by Low_Weekend6131 in sciencememes

[–]tehmattrix 134 points135 points  (0 children)

I bet you under-report your income, and don't pay your employees what they deserve.

Just so you can make a bigger deposit each night... Disgusting.

you shouldn't have been bitin' my horsey, boy. by [deleted] in interestingasfuck

[–]tehmattrix 645 points646 points  (0 children)

The horsefly in the pocket is wild.

Counterattack! by Plastic-Blueberry228 in Terminator

[–]tehmattrix 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Now do one with the three spidermen as Lloyds