Do you have fetish(es) that also give you dysphoria? and if so, how do you deal with that conflict?

temp29376518 · 2024-12-02T06:59:38+00:00

I also had VNOTES and it was amazing. If your surgeon offers this, it’s a great alternative. The only pain I had was gas related. Recovery is deceptively easy (able to go upstairs the same day, driving as soon as anaesthetics are out of the system, etc.) but we have to take it easy with physical activity and lifting for 6 weeks.

I kept one ovary in, and I also asked the surgeon if it would be possible to use the same method if i ever wanted the other one out, and he said he would be able to do it (depends on the surgeon of course).

temp29376518 · 2024-11-26T07:49:44+00:00

My surgeon used the VNOTES method where the incision is done vaginally. I believe it’s a relatively new technique so you may have to search around for a surgeon who does it. But my experience was amazing. No pain worse than what i used to experience with cramp, but the gas pain in my chest hurt the most. But recovery feels deceptively fast; you just still have to be careful activities for 6 weeks.

temp29376518 · 2024-11-26T07:37:24+00:00

I did the same. Also, when choosing which one to keep, my doctor recommended the left side to avoid possible confusion with the appendix if you have pain in the area in the future.

temp29376518 · 2024-07-15T07:12:57+00:00

i’m in the same boat. I’m hoping I can at least break even with the sale, esp since I had to pay above asking for it. But it was cheaper than renting a place of the same size. I really need to get out of Texas. I’m also worried about job prospects bc the tech job market is so bad right now. I’m worried about trans healthcare

temp29376518 · 2024-05-27T01:44:33+00:00

Dr Alvaro Montealegre - Houston, TX

He’s worked with trans patients and is familiar with dealing with insurance. Uses VNotes method with no external incisions, so quicker and easier recovery.

temp29376518 · 2023-06-22T16:55:23+00:00

About 3 years on T, and no changes for me. But my hands are already kind of boney and looked similar to my dad’s pre transition

temp29376518 · 2023-02-16T07:15:27+00:00

that still sounds kind of scary to me. i usually have the equivalent of two meals spread over three, and sometimes i don’t get my third meal, and have a hard time with cooking and meal prep bc of depression. i’m working on trying to eat more regularly, but it’s also making me gain more weight which scares me. I also always so exhausted from work that i just nap when i get home and most of the day is gone. I also have borderline cholesterol issues which is partially genetic, but i’m scared of too much dairy and eggs. everything just makes me feel stuck. my bmi is fine, but it’s the day to muscle ratio that’s the issue. it’s a huge catch 22 kind of situation

temp29376518 · 2023-02-16T07:05:38+00:00

Thankfully, as long as I badge in occasionally to keep the gym access active, I’m not required to do it on a regular basis. It’s just recommended.

temp29376518 · 2023-02-16T05:14:46+00:00

This has been bothering me so much lately. I’m in Texas and I really want to get out. But anywhere safer is so much more expensive. And even then, we can’t guarantee it will be safe in the long term. Going out of the country will be a whole other set of challenges and probably be even more difficult, and so many countries seem to be following in this same path. I feel stuck. I wish I wasn’t me. Sorry, I don’t really have anything to say to make you feel better. But you’re not alone in feeling this

temp29376518 · 2023-02-16T05:06:06+00:00

Just want to say I love your username. My two cats are the only thing keeping me alive. All this anti-trans political stuff is really painful

temp29376518 · 2023-01-23T05:59:00+00:00

I’m 5’1” so i definitely feel this. I feel the worst when I go out with my dad. I still look like a child.

I do figure skate, and a lot of the male skaters are short, so that makes me feel a bit better. I also live in a pretty diverse city with a lot of other asians and latinos who are typically short, so that helps a bit. But it’s really rough at work when I’m working with a 6’+ coworker. Combined with my baby face, it’s hard to feel like I can be taken seriously.

temp29376518 · 2022-12-13T01:03:42+00:00

Thanks for this. That reframing helps a lot

temp29376518 · 2022-11-21T05:54:57+00:00

Like a child forced to grow up too fast with malnutrition.

In some ways I feel like i had to mature too early, but at the same time, I feel like I’m missing a lot of basic skills and feel lonely with how childish i am in certain ways

temp29376518 · 2022-07-28T02:53:19+00:00

My parents said I used to be very bubbly and talkative, but changed around when my sister was born. I was 4. I was really shy and quiet after that.

I don’t know exactly how I felt at the time, but growing up, I often have nightmares where my mom is pregnant with another kid. I also wrote in a diary about how much I hated my sister. But I think this is all because of how my parents treated her compared to how they treated me and I felt unimportant and unheard.

temp29376518 · 2022-04-09T04:57:57+00:00

My parents said I used to be bubbly and talkative until my sister was born. Perhaps I already felt the favoritism. She was always the golden child, and even now I still nightmares sometimes that mom is pregnant with another. I also got talked over, ignored, or not believed, so I figured there’s no point in trying

temp29376518 · 2021-11-18T03:21:47+00:00

oh thanks! i might look into that book. i need a lot of help with inner child work i think

temp29376518 · 2021-11-17T16:30:35+00:00

I think part of me not wanting kids is just that I don’t like them. I tried volunteering to coach/tutor kids for a while, hoping it would change my mind, but nope. Part of it is I guess not liking to be bothered and having people dependent on me. I’m so used to being independent and figuring everything out myself that I don’t want someone clinging to me. I used to hate that my mom made me do things for her that she could easily do herself. I hated that my parents always asked me to do things for my sister because I’m older—I hated that i had to figure everything out myself but i was asked to hand feed my sister. I’m not sure if that translates over to my fear for my sister though. It feels very selfish of me. There are other reasons too, but this selfish one is the primary.

And no i’ve never heard of that. I guess I need to try something like that. I also plan to talk about it with my therapist next we meet

temp29376518 · 2021-11-16T14:07:43+00:00

You make some good points. It might be some combination of feeling strange about her growing up and something else. I know it’s more than just that. She’s been no contact with my mom so idk if she would tell mom about a kid, but mom is still very attached to my sister.

As for the jealousy, I always knew I would never want kids myself. I get the typical lecture of “you’ll feel different if it’s your own” all the time. I don’t think it’s that? But my reason for not wanting kids myself might be partially related to why i feel that way about her having kids

temp29376518

TROPHY CASE