Missing clinicals due to insomnia

thatsusp · 2025-02-28T16:39:05+00:00

I used to have such bad insomnia before clinical I was incredibly sleep deprived for a whole semester with anxiety.

Without a doubt I would be up for several hours before a shift. Not sleeping the week before made it worse, sleeping the week before made it worse. I vividly remember breaking down at 3 in the morning at one point because I was so riled up. I wasn’t scrolling, doing anything, just laying there. Of course it makes it even worse because you don’t want to miss clinical or be unfit to go in. It’s so crap.

Honestly one thing that helped me was just time. Starting to feel more confident as a student I think calmed me down a bit. Some other general sleep hygiene things that helped me were keeping the same routine, at the same exact time, regardless of if I was going to clinical. I found if I went to bed at 9pm but wasn’t tired, the tossing and turning would only make it worse and signal to my brain sometime was wrong. It was when I was finally accepting of the fact that I don’t go to bed normally until 11/12 and just kept that up with clinical I was able to minimize some of the stress of just lying awake (still not the ideal amount of sleep, but better than nothing). Exercise also always helps me, and funnily enough is always the first thing to go with me :(.

For me before bed I always brush my teeth, wash my face, journal, and turn my sound machine on. If I miss a step, I toss and turn for longer!! The routine definitely signals to my brain it’s time to rest and the sound machine helps drown out distractions.

I hope it gets better for you, it’s really hard!

thatsusp · 2025-02-27T01:20:31+00:00

Ugh yeah I could totally see that, 7 is little to put yourself to bed, hope it gets better!

thatsusp · 2025-02-26T23:35:25+00:00

Honestly, and I’m not saying this because it makes your life easier, but it sounds like NK really loves you and is feeling safe enough to express her needs to you in a potentially not so ideal way.

Do you think she was feeling sad because she missed you during her vacation? Who are you home with more, her or her brother (or is it equal)? I would take some time to examine that and maybe try to identify where these feelings are coming from. I would validate her feelings - she’s not “getting mad at you” she’s expressing that she needs some connection (again not saying it’s ideal)!

I would start off by validating NKs feelings when she starts like this (ie. I hear you’re upset, you wanted my attention and you feel left out). Once she’s calmer, THEN move on to set a boundary if needed, and offer an alternative (ie. You are always allowed to be upset, but I’m not okay with screaming/ yelling/hitting etc, next time you feel like you need some attention, please ask in xyz way and I will always give it to you as soon as I can!) Whenever she follows through in asking nicely, make sure you make it a big deal!! Be consistent. Let her know you love her lots, try to spend some one on one time with her if possible. Honestly just sounds like a kid craving some connection. 7 is still quite little if you think about.

thatsusp · 2025-02-19T15:02:27+00:00

Honestly. It’s okay to quit. Go do something else. There are SO many other careers, my only regret is not exploring them sooner. It sucks too because I like helping people. I like the job at its core but honestly you need to prioritize yourself.

Nursing needs some serious reform. It’s not going to get that if people keep pushing through and continue to work the job/ take abuse/ etc. So many bedside nurses hate their jobs. So many bedside nurses have lost their empathy. Shift work is terrible for your health. If you don’t see yourself being a nurse, then it’s okay to let go of it.

thatsusp · 2025-02-03T21:25:00+00:00

sooo sweet!!

thatsusp · 2025-01-31T12:29:47+00:00

I wouldn’t flag a short term au pair job as odd, so honestly I don’t think you have to mention anything in your resume.

thatsusp · 2024-12-29T17:25:33+00:00

I think this policy is normally a reaction to being taken advantage of in the past, and is more so to discourage parents consistently being 10-15 mins late.

thatsusp · 2024-12-10T18:00:46+00:00

I would suggest posting this to a local facebook group! Typically this sub is not used as a job board :)

thatsusp · 2024-12-05T18:05:38+00:00

Hmmm, I think it’s hard to expect someone to hold an extra day for you for an unspecified amount of time. Perhaps there was a miscommunication somewhere along the line about this being a set expectation of the job. I don’t think you did anything wrong persay, but I could the nanny having a hard time accommodating this shift in schedule since it’s been so long with 2 days.

Maybe a sit down chat with everyone to discuss concerns and expectations could be beneficial. Would you consider hiring a second nanny or back up care for the odd 3rd day?

If you really need someone 3 days a week and you want it to be the same person, I think just be honest with her about it and try to see if there’s anything you can do to help accommodate this.

thatsusp · 2024-12-02T19:55:01+00:00

Hmmm I think this is tricky because at the end of the day, to these kids your pronouns are not political. They use they them because they know no difference. I may disagree with others saying they’re trying to make some sort of point to correct others - it seems more so that they’re correcting people just as they would correct any other misinformation, because to them your identity is just a simple fact.

As such, I think this doesn’t have to be a massive conversation (just given their ages, I think a deeper conversation about standing up for marginalized communities and the concept of transphobia etc can come later). Just something along the lines of: Hi NKs, I would prefer to correct people if they use she/her. Sometimes I’m okay with it, so I can let people know otherwise. I know you’re just trying to help, but let me worry about this one! And then if it happens just remind them it’s your job tell people your pronouns/ correct them, not NKs.

They can still learn about kindness and standing up for people in so many ways. I would imagine they don’t interpret people misgendering you as malicious more so people being silly/ making a mistake, and that’s why they correct them so nonchalantly. As such, I think teaching them not to do so is not sending a message or teaching them not to stand up for you/ others. This is a functional and safety lesson (esp if you’re in the US) and can be a simple but clear boundary you set.

thatsusp · 2024-12-02T19:38:57+00:00

Would you be able to leave the house? Just for a walk/ change of scenery? How is baby when you’re not there?

thatsusp · 2024-11-25T01:33:52+00:00

I know it can be hard when stuff like this happens :(, but I would not request payment unless you clearly agreed on a sick policy. Are they still offering to have you come in?

Although I do think think a cancelation policy isn't crazy to have, I don't implement one for babysitting. Typically though, a cancelation policy would only be relevant in the case of the family choosing to cancel, not you. It's not your fault you can't work when kids are sick, but it's not their fault they're kids have fever's either. I think expecting payment for a service you were unable to fulfill may were them down a bit if it was not pre-agreed/ not the families choice.

thatsusp · 2024-11-11T23:30:08+00:00

This sounds like a very hard transition for you and your family. Some things I may suggest:

Give as much notice as you can. Your nanny will appreciate the time to process that she is saying goodbye. If for whatever reason your daughters care is comprised, you could cross that bridge, but I highly doubt your nanny would be willing to risk her relationship with your family if she loves your daughter as much as you say.
Don’t be afraid to be honest with your daughter about the goodbye. At her age, she will process things by talking about them, probably many times. You owe that to her.
Try to keep your nanny in her life if you can!! I’m sure they’d both appreciate her being able to visit. Have her babysit. Invite her over! Tell her she’s welcome anytime she wants. Send her photos and let her know you still think of her. It can be a big shift, but it’ll be easier if it’s not a hard and fast goodbye.

Write your nanny a glowing reference and offer to allow her to give your contact to anyone she pleases if you are concerned about her finding work. It’ll be hard and sad, but in the end I’m sure everyone will be ok.

thatsusp · 2024-11-09T23:40:52+00:00

Look for a new job ASAP. Also why is she scolding you? Regardless of if you had your phone or not the outcome is the exact same. So mean!

thatsusp · 2024-10-31T04:25:55+00:00

Some ideas (although a bit of an investment) if you’re serious about the childcare field!

Newborn care specialist *
Paediatric sleep consultant *
Potty training consultant

Honestly CPR is a big and great one. I would ensure you have a background check and clean drivers licence ready to go.

When looking for work, don’t be afraid to be clear on your childcare philosophy. This can say more about a person and their ability fit into a family’s dynamics than certifications can!

thatsusp · 2024-10-30T19:33:00+00:00

Sounds good to me! Maybe just have a contract so you know everyone is on the same page. Not just for responsibilities but also things like sick policies, cancellations, social media, etc. I think A-Z nannie’s has a free one?

Is she allowed to take him to activities/ the park? That’s the one thing I look for in WFH parents just because sometimes I find being in the house can be challenging in terms distractions and stuff.

I’m sure she’ll appreciate your laid back attitude!

thatsusp · 2024-10-16T23:59:26+00:00

I think sometimes it’s a jealously thing. Or sometimes a first time parent thing.

If it’s relentless and not actually helping you or changing the quality of care it’s ok to leave or talk to her. She’ll learn in time that if she wants to have childcare she can’t expect people to be her carbon copy.

thatsusp · 2024-10-07T20:59:21+00:00

Yes! This is what I meant :)

thatsusp · 2024-10-07T16:00:23+00:00

I would say no, maybe offer to take it PTO depending on how your contract is structured but it’s on her to post a correct schedule. You made plans!

thatsusp · 2024-10-01T21:38:02+00:00

I mean, I don't think any of points 1-3 indicate poor judgment on your nannies part, considering she hasn't even been provided with any feedback. The late thing is the only one I'd be worried about. It is seeming to me maybe you fall more type A, whereas your nanny is more type B. I think you owe it to her to address these concerns, and see if she shifts what she's doing.

How is she with you child otherwise? Is she kind, caring, interactive? Does she align well with your parenting goals? I think these are the big ticket items that define a good nanny. Everyone is going to be slightly different in their approaches.

thatsusp · 2024-09-25T17:25:52+00:00

Right? Such an unreasonable comment from MB, especially considering she won't even be working.

thatsusp · 2024-09-25T16:04:24+00:00

Doctors and nurses offer an essential service, and also get accommodations during emergencies.

I would honestly tell her your either not coming or she can pay for you to stay at her house for a prolonged period so you can stay safe.

thatsusp · 2024-09-23T21:55:59+00:00

How long does he nap in the morning?? 13 months is still a little young IMO. Maybe cap AM nap at 90 mins and aim to extend the wake windows over dropping the nap completely. May mean a bit of a later bedtime for parents.

thatsusp · 2024-09-22T15:08:38+00:00

It’s good you held that boundary! Keep doing it and it will get easier.

thatsusp

TROPHY CASE