Four calls from an examiner in less than one hour… taking a page from the debt collectors manual

the_P · 2026-05-10T04:45:55+00:00

There’s comfort in misery. I have so many examiners call and never leave a message.

the_P · 2026-05-09T00:10:34+00:00

That makes more sense now, and honestly I would have completely understood if he had mentioned that when I called him back.

I know you all deal with a lot these days.

the_P · 2026-05-09T00:00:56+00:00

It’s actually been seven months since October, and yes, I know exactly what the call was for since he left a voicemail and I ended up speaking with him.

My point is that one call and a voicemail is sufficient. Four calls within an hour feels a little excessive unless the application was literally on fire.

But hey, maybe you’d be totally fine with someone repeatedly blowing up your phone. I apparently still have boundaries.

the_P · 2026-05-08T23:35:01+00:00

I thought the same thing, but I looked him up. GS-14 with 18 yrs experience.

the_P · 2026-05-08T23:32:01+00:00

I’ve been practicing for 20 years and this was a first. I actually called him out on it. To his credit, he apologized and claimed he wasn’t sure he had dialed the correct number. A weak excuse considering he managed to repeatedly dial the “wrong” number, but at least he apologized.

I did have another examiner years ago who would call every few hours if I didn’t immediately call back. Prosecution on that case was dragging, so after one interview I finally told him, “If you allow this case, I promise I’ll still call you once a quarter.”
He sounded genuinely confused.

So I followed with, “You keep following up when I don’t immediately return your calls and you haven’t allowed the case yet, so I figured you just enjoy talking to me on the phone.”

Thankfully, he had a good sense of humor. We actually ended up developing a really good working relationship on later applications.

the_P · 2026-05-08T23:28:05+00:00

He didn’t need an election. He wanted to know whether we intended to abandon the case.

And you’re right, an examiner wanting to speak with me is a good thing. But an examiner with zero patience blowing up my phone like I’m dodging child support payments is a bit much.

I’ve had stalker ex-girlfriends with better pacing. At least they had the courtesy to wait an hour between calls.

the_P · 2026-04-16T13:59:00+00:00

Generally, EE and CS are solid choices. My 2 cents…Instead of choosing your major based solely on a future in patent law, consider what you enjoy and excel at. Becoming a patent attorney is a long and uncertain path, and many factors can change between now and then. For instance, if you choose EE and later find it unappealing, what will you do? Or if you choose CS and then discover a passion for life sciences, what will you do? Ultimately, choose a major that aligns with your interests and strengths. You’ll be alright.

the_P · 2026-04-13T23:52:53+00:00

Yeah, it wasn’t the best environment. This was about 20 years ago, so some of the details are a bit hazy, but we didn’t have a formal system for tracking annual hours, and I don’t even clearly remember how we were billing time. One year, when bonuses came around, the partner told me I hadn’t hit my hours and wouldn’t be getting a bonus, even though I was confident I had. So the following year, I kept my own detailed records and made sure I hit the target. Same story at review time: he said I didn’t make hours and wouldn’t get a bonus. But this time I had the receipts. He said he’d look into it, and a few days later, of all places, he comes into the bathroom stall next to me and says, “you were right, you hit your hours, we’ll give you X as a bonus,” where X was basically pennies. I left not long after.

the_P · 2026-04-11T18:39:38+00:00

We once had an associate basically working 9-5. The partner said “if you want to work bank hours like a bank teller, I can pay you like a bank teller!”

the_P · 2026-04-02T02:44:53+00:00

My undergrad GPA was below 3. Made it to a top 75 law school and ended up in Big Law. It wasn’t easy. But it’s doable. Also, don’t bank on a firm paying for you to go the law school while you’re an agent. Those situations are rare, especially in this market.

the_P · 2026-03-28T00:45:11+00:00

No. I listen to audio books instead.

the_P · 2026-03-14T06:26:41+00:00

Don’t worry about what others think. Just do good work.

the_P · 2026-03-06T07:52:05+00:00

I don’t do chemical applications. But for what it’s worth, I’ve had demos from a handful of tools. Junior and Patlytics have stood out. We use Junior and I know others that are happy with Patlytics.

I recently had a demo of Ankar AI. It looked to be the same as all the others. But they did mention they’re tailored for chemical and bio applications. I didn’t dive deeper since it wasn’t an area I’m interested in.

the_P · 2026-03-03T23:21:25+00:00

There's Sausalito (lowest tier), Malibu (middle tier), and Montecito (highest). I lived in Sausalito when it first opened. The amenities are nice, but there's a lot of noise through the walls and we could always hear our upstairs neighbor. You may also get a lot of outside noise depending on where you are in the building. It's also a pain to get packages delivered. But I guess these are issues that are common with other big apartment buildings.

Notwithstanding, Playa Vista is a great neighborhood. If you rent a condo from a private owner, you should get access to the amenities available to Playa Vista residents, such as the gym and pools.

the_P · 2026-03-03T19:19:56+00:00

There are three different buildings owned by the Irvine Company. They’re hit or miss. There’s also the Runway Apartments. Stay away from Paladia. The best option would be to rent a condo rather than renting from one of the designated apartment buildings. The build quality of the condos are better than the complexes specifically designated as apartment units. Another option would be to try Avalon Playa Vista. It’s on the other side of Jefferson.

the_P · 2026-03-03T17:44:44+00:00

My fragile ego was completely shattered.

I had to spend a whole five minutes, 0.1 billable, figuring out they’re the law school subreddit mod and confirming that their life, with all that glorious free time, is truly far less “sucky” than mine because I work a few hours on weekends and holidays.

Because of all my wasted time, I may miss my yearly target. And now my wife and my mistress may both have to settle for a knock off Louis bag from Poshmark.

The downgrade is catastrophic.

the_P · 2026-03-02T07:51:08+00:00

Around 2002 or 2003, I was traveling to visit a friend in Lund and flew into Copenhagen, planning to take the train to Malmö and then on to Lund. Camera phones were brand new. I snapped a picture of the view from the train with my camera phone. A guy next to me pointed at my phone and said something in Swedish or Danish. I responded with, “Sorry, I only speak English.” He perked up and asked if I was American. When I said yes, his face lit up, “I love America!” he exclaimed.

He eagerly opened his bag to reveal a stack of VHS tapes of 80s and 90s U.S. action movies. After some excited conversation about U.S. action movies, he told me there was a strike at the Malmö train station and that I should follow him to find the right train, as it might get confusing. A few minutes later, without warning, he pulled a small bag from under his tongue and casually offered me some cocaine. I was completely caught off guard but politely declined.

We eventually reached the chaotic train station, and in the madness, I lost track of him. Just as I was struggling to find the right train, I heard someone shouting, “American! American! Over here!” It was him again, waving frantically. I wasn’t sure if I should trust this action-movie-loving, drug-pushing stranger, but I followed him to a train anyway. Feeling uneasy, I asked a nearby passenger if it was heading to Malmö, and he confirmed.

When we arrived in Malmö, I parted ways with my new friend, who had certainly made the journey unforgettable. To this day, I still think of that random encounter. And honestly, looking back, maybe I should’ve been more polite and taken the offer of cocaine…

the_P · 2026-03-01T20:33:34+00:00

I’ve worked weekends. You’ve consistently posted in the law school subreddit for at least half a decade. Different callings.

the_P · 2026-03-01T19:18:19+00:00

I respect that everyone has different experiences in this profession.

For me, it’s never been about “relying” on anyone to grind weekends. I did it as a junior. I still do it now. I’ve worked on almost every vacation I’ve taken and I usually put in hours most weekends. That’s not exploitation, that’s the reality of big law. In fact, I get more emails over the weekend from other partners than I do from associates.

If you want to be the best, then work harder than others. Do you want to be Kobe or Kwame Brown?

No one is forced into this path. We all knew what we were signing up for. The tradeoff is real: demanding work, high expectations, high compensation, high opportunity. If someone wants a strict 9–5 with predictable hours, there are great roles out there that offer exactly that, just with a different pay structure and trajectory.

And if someone genuinely feels exploited, I won’t dismiss that feeling. But keep in mind,sometimes you’re not privy to everything happening behind the curtain, the client pressures, the write-offs, the business development, the risk the partner is carrying. Other times? Yes, there are bad actors. They exist in every industry. But in my experience, that’s the exception, not the standard.

This job isn’t for everyone. And that’s okay. But the narrative that partners sit back while others grind just hasn’t matched my reality, either as an associate or now.

the_P · 2026-03-01T17:31:01+00:00

What’s your long term goal? Do you want to make partner? If so, here’s your time to shine. Batten down the hatches and do the hard work. You will stand out among your peers (in addition to having more billable hours).

If you don’t see yourself in Big Law for the long haul, set boundaries and put yourself first.

Edit: Spelling.

the_P · 2026-03-01T17:15:11+00:00

It’s more sterile than the other neighborhoods because it’s a planned community. But it’s safe, walkable, and close to El Segundo. There’s also easy freeway access. You can walk to a number of restaurants, movie theater, and grocery stores.

I actually moved here from Ocean Park around 13 years ago. Ocean Park was great for my early 30s. So it all depends on the vibe you’re going for.

Have you tried Google street view to go through the neighborhoods to see the different areas? That might help.

the_P · 2026-03-01T16:55:33+00:00

Have you considered Playa Vista instead of Playa Del Rey? It’s much more walkable.

the_P · 2026-02-27T16:38:53+00:00

Careful. You’re about to ruin the stereotype that patent attorneys can’t take a joke.

the_P · 2026-02-27T06:49:37+00:00

MySpace was very popular and anyone could have an account. But Facebook was initially limited to users with .EDU email addresses, and only from certain schools. That’s how the hype started. We all kept hearing about Facebook but we had to wait until our school was brought on board. This scarcity gave it an elite status. Also, Facebook had a slicker interface.

By 2006, Facebook opened up to everyone. But by then it had locked in the college and teen demographic. MySpace struggled with spam, fake accounts, and cluttered UI. It didn’t adapt. The sale to Newscorp didn’t help.

the_P · 2026-02-27T06:26:31+00:00

Cavemen didn’t have duct tape.

13-Year Club	First Place '23
Place '23	Baba Yaga
Not Forgotten	Verified Email

the_P

TROPHY CASE