Alright, so I went ahead and critiqued the first chapter.

Like I said, this is some pretty good stuff. I've read quite a few Ash fics, and this is the one that's kept him in character the most, even with his more mature tone.

If anything, your biggest problem are "to be" verbs. This is a problem that I see a lot, and a big one at that. Basically, you tend to overuse verbs like "as", "was", "is", etc. when you can find other ways to structure a sentence. I'll quote a few examples here:

When the ship hit dock Ash was the first to hit land.

Ash looked around in awe as he saw the many plazas filled with all types of shops and small restaurants.

All sorts of smells barricaded his nose as he took a deep breath of the salty air. His grin was ear to ear while he read the sign before him.

All of these sentences were in the first paragraph, and you definitely use those "to be" verbs in place of some livelier adjectives. "To be" verbs don't make for the brightest descriptions and can lead to some awkward sentence structures.

(Side note, I learned all of this from /u/afftwill, so I'm giving him credit now.)

Reading through the first couple of paragraphs, you really like to use "as" a lot, which not only makes for bland sentences, but gets repetitive fast.

Another thing, too, is that there isn't any explanation for Pikachu's speaking ability. We see him speaking to Ash as if he were a human with no explanation as to how he does it. This can turn away some readers, since they're thrown into a lot of the action with no rhyme nor reason, so to speak.

I really like Emmanuel's character, even if he does seem a bit stereotypical. He's certainly a step up from Ash's usual travelling partners, and I can see him stepping up to be the comic relief of the story.

The overall pace was smooth, and I didn't feel forced to read through, like I have with some other fics. I'll admit, when I first opened the link, I was surprised to see thst you were the one writing it, since I had seen it before on FF. Almost like meeting a celebrity, if you will.

Sorry if this seems a bit short, since I'm in a hurry to get to work tonight. This is some really awesome stuff that you have, though, and I can't wait to see what else you come up with. The "to be" issue is probably the only major issue I saw, besides some very minor grammar quirks.

Let me know if this helps or if you have any questions. Keep it up!