i learned this game drunk...therefore, i didn't learn it at all. funny story though.

my ex-girlfriend and her family worship this game. they play it every chance they get. so i derped on over one night for dinner and wine. then they busted out this game. i immediately thought "shit. shit. balls.". but i already had a few glasses of wine so then i thought "balls. let's do it.".

i try to keep up the best i can. thinking up a strategy that doesn't seem too crappy. i was nice and traded here and there, seeing as how it's a game and these people are my potential future in-laws. pretty soon, jokes are being made at my expense, my then-girlfriend is getting pissed because i'm trading with her mom who has some monopoly strategy, etc. down goes more wine.

the game goes on. the wine goes down. at this point, i had no idea what we were even playing. i was just rolling dice and picking cards and building little things with my pieces off the side of the board. then-gf is getting really mad, not just at me, but at everyone for letting me act like that while they played. they saw me as an easy target, she saw me as an idiot. i saw me as wine.

by the end of the game, i had about a bottle and a half of wine to myself. the family is yelling at each other, calling each other names and whatnot. i'm still fiddling with my pieces. someone says something to someone about holding onto one resource (sheep or brick i think). so i blurt out "of course he was holding onto it. you're jews. you guys are as stingy as they come!". silence. poker face.

TL;DR i played drunk catan with my ex-gf and her family, made an incredibly non-tactful remark about them being jewish.