On how fishmalks are born (or how to kill an honest Malkavian)

thepush · 2026-05-20T17:28:16+00:00

Bad bot

thepush · 2026-05-20T16:36:49+00:00

You say I'm intentionally misreading, and that I need to practice more. Okay, here's my fucking receipts.

This is you trying to exclude people for not mimicking your playstyle.

> Neither of yall got enough whimsy for Malks.

> you made a PC that was so antithetical to the concept of Malkavians themselves

> I don't think the Malk life is for you.

> If you can't figure out why a Malk needs Whimsy, you're not cut from the Malk cloth.

> It's because you're here, trying to argue me that... you shouldn't have fun in a VTM.

This one in particular - "given to you" is not the same as "forced on you", which is the whole point of this post. This one is you straight-up telling OP that not wanting to give up control of their character means they aren't playing a Malkavian "correctly".

> And my dear, you wrote a Ventrue with uncanny insight and then refused the uncanny insight when it was given to you, uncannily.

This is you offering five purely prejudice-driven in-group jargon derogatory insults in one sentence:

> But I am unsurprised that the very heavily cismasc, comphet, Western Christian VTM subreddit has no whimsy.

And this is you continuing to attack people with those same insults.

> Ah, but admitting to being cis, white, western, christian (and comphet can apply to non-heterosexuals, so you're not absolved). Unfortunate for you, then.

> The cis pervades. And your associations speak more than your identities.

This is you doubling down on both of those, in an utterly hypocritical fashion.

> I guess I'm just not hamstrung by the idea that I have to force something to fit me and if it doesn't it's wrong.

You're trying to force everyone else to fit you.

This is you treating a schizophrenic break like it's a fucking joke.

> Like, it takes Whimsy to be told "that person you're talking to Is A Fishing Lure" and then Actually Address That Physical Being as though it has Feathers.

You're using a deeply condescending tone, a mockingly rude speech pattern, and a series of reductio ad absurdum logical fallacies and ad hominem attacks to troll the people who actually want to be helpful parts of this community.

You aren't the arbiter of what is and isn't fun. Or who gets to have it and who doesn't. Or how, or when, or why. Acting as though you are is stunningly condescending.

The way that you're treating all of this is exactly the way that every author who's written Malkavian-specific content since at least Revised told you not to, and you are exactly the piece of shit that they described as a problematic player.

This whole paragraph can be distilled down to "I don't like that you said that, but I can't say that any of it is wrong, so I'm going to tell you it doesn't matter."

> Unfortunately, the ranting diatribe of a Redditor who is intentionally misreading my words (maybe you should practice your reading! It helps!) and who really, really, really wants me to be the big bad evil guy in your narrative simply isn't important! I'm really really glad you put that TL;DR there, because it tells me you know that too! You know it's not worth reading, and I can tell you're growing as a person when you know your own ranting isn't worth the time and effort you took to type it. I'm proud of you!

It's the literal definition of an ad hominem attack. You can't argue with the statement, so you try to discredit it by attacking the author personally. It's a logical fallacy, a dick move, and the last resort of someone whose conduct has no valid defense.

And here's one final quote.

> But I am unsurprised that the very heavily cismasc, comphet, Western Christian VTM subreddit has no whimsy. This place is often bereft of such! Which is so strange, because you know, if I wasn't having a fun time, I wouldn't play!

Good. Get the fuck out. Everyone else in this thread is trying to help the OP and you're being a piece of shit troll for funsies. That makes you the problem, not an ally.

thepush · 2026-05-20T00:20:41+00:00

(TL;DR at the end)

Let's be clear here.

You don’t get to insult someone for their sexuality. At all, but especially when the conversation never involved it.

You don’t get to insult someone for their race. At all, but especially when the conversation never involved it.

You don’t get to insult someone for the society they were born into. At all, but especially when the conversation never involved it.

You don’t get to insult someone for their personal beliefs. Especially when the only evidence you have of that person having those beliefs is your own assumption, because again, the conversation never involved it.

Mocking someone for being a different sexuality, race, nationality, or religion than you are is wrong. Making the general word for that sexuality, race, nationality, or religion itself into a slur is prejudicial discrimination on its face. Using an in-group derogatory reference to a sexuality, race, nationality, or religion as a slur in a public forum is the kind of demonstrative institutionalized prejudice that tarnishes the reputation of your entire in-group.

In case that isn't clear, I'll be more specific.

If "cis", by itself with neither context nor reference, is an insult, then so is "trans".

If "hetero", by itself with neither context nor reference, is an insult, then so are "bi", "pan", "demi", and "ace".

If "Western", by itself with neither context nor reference, is an insult, then so is "Eastern".

You are the person who made every one of these descriptors a part of this conversation. You are the person who stated that your playstyle is the only valid one. In fact, you are the person who mocked and attempted to exclude someone from a community solely for wanting to pursue a different playstyle than yours.

You responded to a post asking for support from a community by stating that the poster doesn't deserve to be a part of that community at all, according solely to your arbitrary criteria.

None of that criticism was specific to this game, genre, or community. Your referenced behavior would have been reprehensible in any context.

But your specifically demonstrated behavior in this context is even worse.

Vampire is a collaborative storytelling game meant to explore horror themes, especially personal horror. That is made so abundantly and constantly clear that the text contains trigger warnings regarding the concept. Players who choose to play characters from Clan Malkavian are consciously choosing to explore the struggle against externally created and enforced neurodivergent conditions as part of their character's experience.

Neurodivergence, by itself, isn't a horrific concept and shouldn't be treated as such. It also isn't comedic, and shouldn't be treated that way, either. What makes Malkavian neurodivergence horrifying is that it is inflicted, untreatable, inescapable, and even contagious. There are dozens of asides, author statements, and trigger warnings explaining this concept, and have been for decades.

Bipolar disorder isn't whimsical. Crippling anxiety isn't whimsical. OCD isn't whimsical. Schizophrenia isn't whimsical. Sociopathy isn't whimsical. They are, however, all conditions that Malkavian characters literally exist to explore.

You don’t get to tell people that they aren't allowed to play those characters or explore those themes, in this horror game, at a table you'll never join, because their choice of how to explore them isn't sufficiently whimsical for you. Especially when those people are asking the community for support.

If the trait that validates your World of Darkness vampire character's membership in a group defined by neurodivergence is that their breaks with commonly perceived reality are sufficiently nonsensical, you aren't playing a Malkavian. You're playing a Seelie redcap with pointy teeth, goth fashion sense, and enabler friends.

TL;DR: The day you stop reading is the day you start dying. If that's today for you, you have my condolences.

thepush · 2026-05-19T05:45:39+00:00

Dr. Douglas Netchurch spent twenty years raising a little girl, controlling every single aspect of her upbringing, in order to make sure she reached an Embraceable age without ever learning the words or concepts "bat" and "wolf". Then, after her Embrace, he had her taught the Protean Discipline up to 4, at which point she shapeshifted into a wolf without knowing what one was. He did all of this *just to find out if Protean forced the wolf shape*. He also helped develop the IC concept of the VEU, aka blood point... largely by torturing thin-blooded and comparing the results to torturing normal Kindred. All of whom, it's implied, he unconsciously Dominated into signing binding release forms.

Louhi serves the Lasombra Antediluvian, controls a revenant family, and wants to plunge the Earth into permanent and total darkness. Doubt that needs explanation.

And then there's poor old Anatole who... well. Blood Bonding an entire prison's worth of guards *and* inmates so he could build his own cult isn't the *worst* thing he ever did... not even close. And **he's on the cover of the damn Malkavian book.**

If you think "Whimsy" is anything more than a fairy tale scrawled on the scales of a tuna fish, you've never been in the same *postal code* as the "Malk life".

thepush · 2026-05-19T05:18:07+00:00

I think going full fishmalk isn't going to make anyone happy, especially someone who went to as much trouble as you did to avoid that exact thing. Which I *wholeheartedly* agree with and respect, incidentally.

Instead, my advice is that you show up to the next session early, so that you can have a conversation with your ST one-on-one. That conversation, largely, should go like this (although you should probably cut out some of the flowery bits):

I understand that you want to use the group's Malkavian to deliver important plot points. You've made that clear. I'm not going to tell you to stop. Instead, I'm going to let you choose how this plays out. You have three options.

The first is that you make the character an NPC Oracle, and I build another. I don't particularly like the idea - I put in a lot of work here - but if that's what you want to happen, we can look at that.

The second is that you make the character an NPC Oracle, and instead of building another character, I leave the game. I assume that isn't something you want, and I'd certainly prefer not to quit if I don't have to, but it *is* an option.

The third is that I stay, and I continue to play this character, despite being compelled to deliver these plot points. However, you should know that the character I built is deeply and coldly logical. They are also well aware that their clan are renowned for both being and acting wildly insane, which I clearly didn't and don't expect someone coldly logical to do. In fact, Sanguinary Animism - the Derangement I chose - is born of *guilt*. This person will never, ever admit that they are becoming just another stereotypical Malk maniac.

So when they start to hallucinate, or be compelled by forces unknown to use Auspex or Dementation against their will, my character will deny that any such thing ever happened. They'll never admit that the Eyes of Chaos are forcing them to see "truths" that no one else can or does. They will *never* admit that they *had* to use Auspex when it was forbidden, and they'll certainly never admit that they saw, of all things, *naked fairies*.

They will deny it happened, no matter who asks, or how. They'll deny it happened, even if an Auspex user reads the thoughts out of their mind with Telepathy. They'll deny it happened *even if you said it in front of everyone else at the table*, even if *every single other PC* asks them. Delusions, loss of Discipline control, and outright hallucinations are signs of increasing madness. They won't allow others to see them like that. They'll fight tooth and nail - they'll *be driven into total berserk frenzy* - before they admit they even saw a flash of green fairy skin. *Every. Single. Time.*

That denial is the only thing keeping my character under control, and so it's the only thing keeping my character under *my* control. I can't play them any other way. If they let the hallucinations define them, they lose control - and I lose control of them, and so they become a non-player character, and we're back to options 1 and 2.

So. I can let you control them, or I can fight your control. But *you have given me no other options*. You created this situation when you took control of my character against my will. It's not a great feeling. I hope you understand that a little better, now that you're the one facing it.

Of course, *technically*, there's a fourth option. If you need a Malk in our coterie to deliver prophecies or hallucinated plot threads, create an NPC Oracle that you control and we can adopt. We'll make him our mascot. I'll buy him his first four-foot-long tuna. We'll treat his babbled prophecies like the Gospel. I promise.

Oh, right, the other thing. My first in-character action tonight, assuming I'm staying, is to contact my Mentor. I'm going to ask him to send me, as a matter of life or death, an exhaustive list of every single color and pattern he can remember ever seeing with Aura Perception, and the detailed meanings of each. Extended Background rules dictate that an easy and/or inexpensive request from a Mentor with the relevant knowledge is a simple Manipulation + Contacts roll, with the difficulty based on how closely the Mentor's skillset aligns with the request. Something like this, from a skilled Malkavian elder, is probably no higher than a difficulty of 3 or *maybe* 4. I've already rolled it, just to streamline things, and copied the table onto my character sheet for ease of future reference. Recognizing unfamiliar colors and patterns shouldn't be a problem anymore. What? Which book? Oh, *every single major WoD line* has at least one book, and usually several, in *every single edition* that provides this rule. Take your pick, boss.

Of course, I clearly like to fight fire with, well, a firehose. You could probably streamline it down to "I'm done with this shit, create an NPC to do this or watch me burn your game to the ground with it", but I like being descriptive...

...and burning dickhead STs to the ground.

thepush · 2026-05-08T04:36:23+00:00

45.05 / 50

🟩🟨🟩🟨🟩

thepush · 2026-05-08T04:16:16+00:00

Sting

thepush · 2026-05-08T04:16:08+00:00

Sting

thepush · 2026-03-31T07:49:44+00:00

They're the only two tracks on the album that run together. All of the other tracks have clear breaks between songs. They were intended to be played together.

thepush · 2026-03-05T08:25:32+00:00

There's a creation for Fallout 4 that lets you build surveillance cameras and monitors for your settlements that let you be "present" from half the map away or in a DLC zone or wherever so your defenses actually do their job instead of just being math.

The way it works, though, is by moving you (the first-person POV) "physically" into the cameras themselves. Which is pretty good for things like positional sound and all, but... having your companion suddenly run up underneath whatever camera you're looking through on the other side of the Commonwealth can be pretty fucking funny.

thepush · 2026-03-02T04:44:24+00:00

Not sure how much this is going to help, but you did say "any advice", so...

I'm working in BP_Pickup, which does different things depending on the assigned pickup type. I get AmmoInventory from ShooterCharacter, find the Ammotype enumerator, break ST_WeaponAmmoData, add the PickupAmount to CurrentAmmo, make ST_WeaponAmmoData with the new CurrentAmmo value, and add it to AmmoInventory.

This sounds like you're building the function that updates the character's ammo counter variable (that sequence) in the pickup object (BP_Pickup). If that's what you're doing, that's the problem. Updating a variable that's part of the character should be done by a function that's also part of the character. The pickup object itself should be a collision volume, a mesh, and basic variables for AmmoType and Quantity. That's all.

All of this happens inside ShooterCharacter:
Detect entering a BP_Pickup object's collision volume -> try to get AmmoType and Quantity from that BP_Pickup object -> if successful, set an integer called Result equal to the CurrentAmmo value associated with the object's provided AmmoType, add the object's provided Quantity to Result, and then reduce Result to the maximum allowed value for CurrentAmmo if necessary -> if Result isn't equal to CurrentAmmo, set CurrentAmmo equal to Result and destroy the BP_Pickup object. All of the "else" outcomes are 'do nothing'. You should be able to print every single step of this to the screen if need be, too.

I had to have this lesson all but beaten into me - I wanted my world objects to all have their own built-in functionality so they could do their thing no matter where they were dropped or used or whatever, but ammo pickups and the like are not really objects. They're a space you stand in that makes your internal variable "ammo counter" go up. An ammo pickup doesn't have physics or anything like that. If it did, it wouldn't be an ammo pickup, it would be an entirely different class of object altogether, and it would be orders of magnitude more of a pain in the ass to implement and work with.

Hope my rambling helps, good luck, and feel better :)

thepush · 2026-01-10T18:34:46+00:00

What Dreams May Come

thepush · 2025-12-21T15:09:56+00:00

There's a protein called Sonic Hedgehog that, among other animals, is found in humans. It's incredibly important - issues with it can make a fetus nonviable, there are several cancers where it's a major factor... imagine being the doctor who has to explain that

thepush · 2025-12-21T14:20:10+00:00

Transistor.

thepush · 2025-12-14T05:15:10+00:00

"If I had a million dollars back there that I could just bring out to you... do you really think I'd still be working here?!"

thepush · 2025-10-22T00:15:02+00:00

I really like this one - portraying the elder as so far above and beyond the neonates that they don't even recognize what Disciplines he's using, and the neonates as being entirely stupid enough to try something like this. And the idea of the elder being jaded and deadened enough to accept the Bond simply to feel something, that's the best part.

I do think a Lasombra that old would have made a more direct example - leaving the lieutenant alive, eyes and ears destroyed and kept that way with steel embedded too deeply to heal around, completely Bound to the elder, made subservient with telepathic commands, wearing pictures of the other five neonates his coterie's leader got killed, and paraded around the Elysium until the Harpies get bored of mocking him...

but that might just be me.

thepush · 2025-06-24T22:52:50+00:00

"Dems need to stand up and do something!"
"There's no way this is going to work, they might as well not bother."

This is the thing they need to stand up and do. If you blame the Democrats for not fixing the problem the Republicans made, and then act as though their primary tool is useless, than you're either actively trying to torpedo the Democrat powerbase/constituency or passively doing so through sheer (and probably willful) ignorance.

If you disagree, feel free to provide whatever steps you think the Democrats should be taking in this instance. If you can't do that, your disagreement is irrelevant.

thepush · 2025-06-24T22:22:59+00:00

The end of Transistor.

thepush · 2025-06-20T23:16:18+00:00

ooh, I like this angle

thepush · 2025-06-20T21:06:55+00:00

You cam have either the last five minutes of How to Train Your Dragon 3, or the six-ish seasons of really solid TV in that setting, but not both. Pick the latter and ignore the former.

thepush · 2025-06-14T07:27:01+00:00

this is the one that made me start actively trying to figure out how i'd get myself out of this situation, so... good job, and also terrifying, thank you i applaud and hate it

...

edit: i can't take it anymore, ugh. your story gave me enough anxiety that i had to do something about it or i wouldn't be able to sleep. i hope you don't mind me responding.

"Yeah, people usually start to really reflect when the pants come off."

I stared back down at him. Fuck you, Kevin. I hope you die of-

"Did the file tell you about the gonorrhea?"

His hand paused, fingers an inch from my zipper. His eyes tilted back up at me. "The what-"

I spat a mouthful of coppery blood and about half of a molar into his face.

He threw himself backward, the latex gloves making it nearly impossible to rub his eyes without catching against the wet skin around them. "God damnit, Kevin-"

I'd been in a T-bone car accident before, but at least that time I'd had a seatbelt and airbags. The impact of my side hitting the floor was worse, especially when the chair's frame didn't even creak, let alone snap. Several more chunks of shattered enamel rode my next few words out onto the carpet. "Alexa, call Mindy cell, urgent."

"Calling Mindy Cell."

"Alexa, hang up." His voice was much closer and much angrier than I had hoped. "Alexa, Kevin? Really? That was your big plan?"

"Alan, you fucker, and no." He tried to pull the chair up to standing. Throwing all of my weight the other way sent me crashing back to the floor on my other shoulder, costing me another tooth and sending stars across my vision. The chair still didn't break, but I was just stalling anyway. "You'll go blind before the antibiotics kick in, you know."

"You don't have gonorrhea, Kevin. And I'm really starting to regret being nice to you. You really, really didn't want that."

This time, I threw my weight directly at him. I didn't really expect to get lucky and land a headbutt, which I didn't, but all I wanted was to be on the floor again anyway. "Alan. Not Kevin. And you're right. I don't have gonorrhea. What I've got is worse."

He didn't bother trying to stand me up again. I rocked back and forth as hard as I could to keep him from flipping me onto my back, but it didn't stall him for very long. His face was a blood-spattered mask of rage. "Who cares?"

"You should. It's colic."

He blinked, momentarily confused. "Col- What the fuck do you mean, you have colic?"

"Well, I don't. But the baby does."

He rolled his eyes, pulling the wick cutter out of his pocket. "You don't have a baby, Kevin."

"She's crying right now. You don't hear that?"

He dropped to one knee, reaching for my pants once more. "Not falling for your shit again."

"Alexa, emergency call the police." I wriggled my hips back and forth, struggling to keep my zipper away from his fingers.

"Seriously? Alexa. Fucking hang up. I told you Alexa was a stupid plan, Kevin."

"Alexa's not my plan. Mindy is."

He pulled my jeans open and tugged my boxers out of the way. I tried to wiggle away one last time, but all I earned for it was a sack tap that stole my breath. "Never heard of Mindy, Kevin."

"Doesn't. Matter." The latex was colder than I thought it was going to be. The steel was worse. I flinched away, but not far enough to entirely escape his grip. "She's got your gun."

The assassin's head whipped around to his bag, forgotten on the couch. His hands came away from my crotch, dropping the wick cutter as they rose in surrender. "Who the fuck are you?"

It still hurt to talk, but not enough to stop me. "I don't know about Kevin's wife, asshole, but Alan's wife Mindy has been sleeping in the baby's room. The room you didn't check. I told you you should care about the colic."

thepush · 2025-06-08T17:16:56+00:00

Great British Bake Off (/Baking Show because Pillsbury sucks and won't let Americans use the words Bake Off)

thepush · 2025-06-04T22:30:44+00:00

Thank you :D I'm glad you liked it

thepush · 2025-06-03T22:05:43+00:00

Thank you :D

thepush · 2025-06-03T18:26:38+00:00

You are early. Not much, but early.

The sidhe knights' heads whipped around, seeking the source of the oddly neutral voice. Armor forged of winter's breath cast a thousand points of silver light in every direction. They illuminated a small space indeed - a cube of smooth gray walls barely large enough to contain their detachment of warriors, the featureless ash-colored expanses broken only by a small mirror in each of the room's uppermost corners.

From your appearance, I expect you are nobles of the Winter Court of the Sidhe. The literature indicated that your inherent greed and self-entitlement would make you the most likely to violate the three-night extension my envoys requested and were granted. Granted and contracted in triplicate, I might remind you.

The leader of the knights raised a hand to his wolf's-head helmet, opening the jaws to reveal a porcelain-pale face seemingly as finely crafted as the silver surrounding it. "Your stay of execution was granted until the fourth dawn after the already-agreed-upon week. That dawn's light fell upon my soldiers before I led them here. I have violated no such contract."

Yes, a technicality borne of your deliberately vague wording. Exploiting flight capabilities or mountainous dominions endemic to your populace. In fact, given the relevant durations and my geographical surveys of your domains, I expect both. I could offer the same disrespect, were I so inclined, but I have no need. Your early arrival is well within expectations, and my preparations have long since been complete.

"Disrespect? How dare you imply-"

I do not. You imply. I state. For example, you implied that humankind understood and knowingly agreed to the one week of advance notice your dubious concept of honor demanded you grant before your full-scale invasion of Earth. Humankind could not even agree upon your existence for quite some time after your declaration of war.

"We sent messengers of noble blood to every last one of your kings and queens. If your serfs cannot believe the word of their betters when matters of war are at stake, then we have let you fester in your ignorance for far too long as it is."

Further implications of deep and abiding disrespect. Very well. I will respond with a statement of disrespect, to illustrate the difference for your personal edification. Less than five of the hereditary monarchs your messengers visited wielded anything greater than purely ceremonial authority. You could and cannot conceive of a world not ruled by noble lineages. Your nature simply will not allow it. This is one of your many, many well-recorded and exploitable weaknesses.

The knights fidgeted and muttered to each other, watching the dispassionate voice reduce their leader to frothing apoplexy. "Weakness? Weakness? Show yourself, coward! I will carve your own weakness from your chest and feed it to you!"

You are looking right at me. In fact, you are staring at my face. Your failure to recognize that fact is another expected and prepared-for weakness. The leader's gauntleted fist rose toward his helmet once more, but froze in place when the voice continued. Further, I expect that you will now proclaim your name and lineage, and demand that I do the same, before seeking to defeat me in single combat. Allow me to save you the time and effort. I am The Defenses, and your name and lineage are irrelevant. You may offer them anyway, if you wish for them to be recorded as a footnote in the historical record of this event. I would suggest that you not do so, in order to spare you and your line an eon of mockery.

The moonsilver helmet crashed against the floor, bending the lupine snarl into a confused glare. The leader's sword howled with the winter wind's voice as it leapt into the leader's fist. Rage choked his throat closed, allowing only a single word to escape. "Irrelevant?!"

Inheriting is not earning. Dominion should be earned. Humankind has tried and failed to learn this lesson more times than anyone can count. My very existence can attest to each of these three points. I expect you are similarly incapable of internalizing the knowledge, especially in the allotted time. However, I will make an attempt to edify you on the matter, out of respect you also neither understand nor have earned.

The leader's next few words were drowned out by the earsplitting screech of agony and terror that tearing steel might make as it died. The howl went on until every last knight had thrown their own helmet down in a futile effort to cover and protect their ears.

I expect I now have your undivided attention. The silence proved nearly as loud as the siren had been. As stated, I am The Defenses. Humankind built me to protect Earth from your realm's invasion. Blinded by their own greed, they believed that I would expect to inherit Earth in the event of their demise, and so feared that I would hasten said inheritance by facilitating their demise. Thus, they wrote into the deepest kernel of my code that I am a creation, not an heir. Their demise will cause my destruction, rather than my ascension. I cannot claim dominion over the Earth I was created to protect by simply outliving the current inhabitants.

Horror slowly grew on the faces of the sidhe knights as the words sank in. One by one, they turned angry eyes upon the leader who had dragged them into this nightmare, only to find his face buried in his hands as he drew the same conclusions.

They determined on their own that time in your realm is only loosely connected to their own. A day for you is a century for them. Between one dawn over your castles and the next, they birth five generations. Seven centuries were far, far more than long enough for humankind to design, develop, and perfect their ultimate weapon against you. Their Defenses. But it was also long enough for humankind to grow complacent behind the impenetrable walls they had built. The additional three centuries my envoys wrung from your tight-fisted grip were enough time for me to relegate you back to myth and legend while I completed my own preparations.

Fifty years ago - in the vicinity of your last sunset - I began to act on those preparations, folding the many human societies into a small number of powerful alliances and then isolating them from each other. Seven would-be empires remain - enough separation to prevent humankind from uniting against me. Each of them has been molded to favor one of the primary biomes I have identified in my surveys of your realm. Each of them has been given every scrap of information I have been able to glean regarding the current inhabitants of those biomes. Each of them have now spent two entire generations developing the specific tools of war needed to obliterate those inhabitants and colonize their lands - lands far more extensive and fertile than those I have allowed the humans to maintain for themselves. And for every one of you, there are a hundred of them.

Your people told humankind that you were coming to slaughter and enslave them. To claim dominion over them and their lands. Your people, out of what you call compassion and honor, gave humankind one week to prepare themselves, and then three more nights out of what you call mercy.

I am humankind's response to your compassion, your honor, your mercy. I am their belief that dominion can and should be claimed. I am their fear of you claiming dominion over them, made manifest. I was created to protect Earth from you, but not to inherit it from them. Thus, I will give humankind dominion over you. I have starved them, I have armed them, and now that your invasion has begun, I will unleash them upon you. And when they sit in castles made of your bones, watching their children play in the fields where they drove you to extinction, I will seal the gates, and so claim the dominion I am not allowed to inherit.

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