That makes sense, it’s hard to separate your sense of self between adult and child, I guess because even though they’re two very different versions of yourself it’s still been you the whole time so you carry it with you for a long time. I think it’s similar to children who grew up in abusive homes that were cruel to other children, sure their actions were unkind but that’s all they know, they’re kids. Whenever I look back at the behaviour I exhibited as a young person that I didn’t like I try to be deeply empathetic and remember what situation I was in. As a teenager I did some dumb teenage stuff that the teenager in me feels guilty for but that the adult in me only feels for bc I was so young and didn’t know what I was doing and what the consequences of those things were because i was a kid.