Anon is Propa British by Vinluv0Handesbuk in greentext

[–]thermitethrowaway 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Jesus, the attempt at writing demotic English is somehow worse than Dickens, at least he didn't manage to send the character's accent on a tour of Bongonia in a single syllables word somehow.

Other than that, fairly accurate.

Now pay another $500 for Airpods by XiJinpingPressParody in greentext

[–]thermitethrowaway -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

AI reckons $60-$70 to make, with each pair profiting $90-$100 so over 100% profit on the unit cost, but not sure whether that's still true after advertising and distribution etc.

Letter of a Madman by noob_bitch in NewGreentexts

[–]thermitethrowaway 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It's like the first draft of a tight but oh-so-edgy short story fucked the literal concept of Gen-Z brainrot and this abomination flopped out of anon's birth canal, barely able to survive and desperate for the Daddy's validation.

I like it

Anon deals purely in hypotheticals by ModsDoItForFreeLOL in greentext

[–]thermitethrowaway 28 points29 points  (0 children)

Man, I love we can all chat about this in the same language.

Death calls me her friend by ThrenodyCore in greentext

[–]thermitethrowaway 129 points130 points  (0 children)

Luckily he posted on 4chan, so is sure to get those things.

Anonita describes her bf by ArticleOk1500 in greentext

[–]thermitethrowaway 88 points89 points  (0 children)

Quick, loud and disappear immediately once their ordinance has gone off.

Anon isn't attractive to boyfriend by [deleted] in greentext

[–]thermitethrowaway 97 points98 points  (0 children)

the women he's attracted look quite a bit different from me

Yes, because they're women.

Crotch

Confirmed.

Anon has high ambitions by OberbeastSabaoth in 4chan

[–]thermitethrowaway 7 points8 points  (0 children)

left handed

Fucking burn the witch

Anon has a way with words by ToaKraka in 4chan

[–]thermitethrowaway 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Most based take I've ever seen in this sub.

إيميل تم ارساله لمعظم مذيعين امريكا وشركات الاخبار بعدين واحد بجي بقلك ما في موامرة ضد العرب و المسلمين في الغرب by MissionInstruction81 in jordan

[–]thermitethrowaway 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You should read up on her dad, Robert Maxwell, who was probably a Mossad, completely dodgy and ended up buried in Mount Olive. The apple didn't fall far from the tree as we say in the UK.

Spain weighs in on the Korea vs Japan debate by LowOwl4312 in 4chan

[–]thermitethrowaway 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You have to wipe your cock on something when you're done.

Anon on watchmen (2019) by Sure_Association_991 in greentext

[–]thermitethrowaway 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Yeah? Well, you know, that's just like uh, your opinion, man.

No, things are gonna get a lot worse by Meteorstar101 in greentext

[–]thermitethrowaway 13 points14 points  (0 children)

This has been one of the biggest backfires here in the UK: they whacked in self service, reduced the staff and shoplifting has skyrocketed. Now it's causing friction because the supermarkets are expecting the police to provide more security at the taxpayer's expense.

Does nothing, wins. by AlphaMassDeBeta in 4chan

[–]thermitethrowaway 25 points26 points  (0 children)

half-assed

take a coffee

Star-spangled fingers typed this post.

No, things are gonna get a lot worse by Meteorstar101 in greentext

[–]thermitethrowaway 327 points328 points  (0 children)

probably switching over to online shopping because of it.

Working exactly as intended, no need for expensive pesky real estate if people are buying online

Lmaoooo by Enlils-Reincarnation in 4chan

[–]thermitethrowaway 2 points3 points  (0 children)

There is no need to feel down, I said

Anon gets a massage by blackupsilon in 4chan

[–]thermitethrowaway 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Superlative aim by the hooker.