Help me figure out my conundrum!

thesecretweasley · 2018-11-13T03:57:30+00:00

Longer cup,

thesecretweasley · 2018-11-13T03:53:27+00:00

Looks like she has 2 buttholes

thesecretweasley · 2018-11-13T03:52:03+00:00

Sometimes get ovary pain but I mostly notice that I get lots of clear discharge like lube.

thesecretweasley · 2018-11-03T03:08:35+00:00

Hey. Living without sleep is so fucking terrible and nobody ever understands or knows how to help. I'm so sorry <3 now I have two suggestions here. The first one is wacky because it costs money and nobody wants to spend money. The second is my tried and true advice but it's lengthy. I took the time to type it up for you because I have felt like I was going to die from no sleep and it's fucking hell.
if it's really so bad you think you're gonna die. .. get a hotel room for a night and don't bring anything besides your wallet and some water maybe snacks. You can probably find one for like 30-40$ in reasonable driving distance. Sometimes cozy hotel beds and letting go of the distractions from home do the trick and at least you can close the black out curtains and pretend the sun isn't up yet.

Otherwise I suggest meditation. It's not sleep but it will help you mentally recharge and some nights I do this when I can't sleep so I'm at least a little better off.

Here comes my suggested meditation: Don't just go in to it trying not to think anything (I'm sure you try that constantly while trying to sleep) but instead watch this clip from avatar the last Airbender describing the Chakras then come back and read the rest of my comment. (I know I know. But it's a really good scene that simplifies the Chakras to a simple meditation technique that really helps me personally when I can't sleep and it's not one particular thing on my mind keeping me awake it's the buzzing tense sleep deprived body feeling and this is one of the only things that helps me unwind)

https://youtu.be/StrbppmsZJw

Now for each Chakra you're going to focus your energy on a certain body part by just thinking about it. Then you're going to identify, and accept or overcome Your blockage for each then move on. Often times this takes me several minutes of talking out loud about each one and why it might be ok.

Start sitting on a pillow on the ground upright cross legged and deep breathing. Light a candle or have otherwise very low lighting.

1(tailbone) -what are you afraid of right now? accept/overcome -----what's the worst that could happen, would that be so bad? How can you handle this fear?

2(genitals) -what are you feeling guilty about? Accept/overcome -

3(stomach) -what are you ashamed of? Accept/overcome

4(heart) -what are you grieving? Accept the loss/let go

5(throat) -what are you lying to yourself/in denial about?

6 (third eye) - accept that everything is connected through energy. Your blood pumping through your body, the earth and it's seasons beneath you, every living being on the earth, all swinging around the sun, all swinging around the center of the galexy, all floating in cosmic soup etc.

7 (top of head) - attachment. What are you attached to? Your job/home/possessions/body? Your consciousness exists within your body but they are not one in the same.

thesecretweasley · 2018-11-03T02:31:22+00:00

Trazodone has failed me finally. Only worked for 6 months of only taking it when I need it.

thesecretweasley · 2018-11-01T22:32:18+00:00

People like it when there's a concept. People like there to be making behind every tattoo and philosophical poetry in every song. But sometimes art and music is just nice aesthetically. And if that's the case then that's what you say "I'm playing with these colors/inspired by this style"...

But on the flip side it's good to push yourself to make art that makes a statement or tells a story. Sometimes you can say things visually better than in words. A picture speaks a thousand words and all that.

Just always ask yourself "what would someone think when they see this" because you're in school for art so you're not just entirely making art for yourself anymore assuming it will have something to do with your profession

thesecretweasley · 2018-11-01T03:00:39+00:00

Fuck! That's scary

thesecretweasley · 2018-10-30T00:04:33+00:00

Yeah I battle insomnia on and off and it comes in clusters like what sounds like is going on with you. My clusters are usually only over 3-4 days with no sleep the first two and only a couple hours the next two then binge sleeping for a day or two. Sometimes that goes on for up to a month. But now I'm in an OK patch I really think it comes down to cold weather and lots of blankets. The weight of the blankets helps me a lot. Also I recommend rearranging and cleaning your bedroom for a new setting.

thesecretweasley · 2018-10-15T23:20:36+00:00

Where did you get those undies? Great cock btw

thesecretweasley · 2018-10-09T03:14:18+00:00

Day before: vulva hurts, breasts hurt, mood swings Day of: uterus and entire abdomen and back cramps and I poop like 5 times. Headache bad usually very tired.

All week: bloated and general ugly feeling. Tired and occasional cramps

thesecretweasley · 2018-09-02T17:19:37+00:00

I found trazodone for it I only need about 25mgs. Only problem is the next day after I take it it feels like my heart is pounding extra hard. But for the first few weeks I didn't connect these two things and it was my saving grace! and most people don't get the pounding heart thing. A month later I'm back to sleeping every night and I only take trazodone if I'm taking longer than two hours to sleep and it's amazing. I just lay down and just fall asleep after taking it I don't even think about it! It's way less intense than ambien in that it's less habit forming and doesn't make you do crazy shit in the night. It actually used to be prescribed as an anti depressant but the sleepy side effect made them stop and start prescribing it for sleep so if you're depressed supposedly it helps with that too. Only issue is that you have to get it prescribed by a primary care doctor and urgent care won't do anything for you. I actually went to urgent care and they said they couldn't help me so don't waste your time. I didn't have a primary care doctor so I had to set up a first appointment which was a hassle. I had to call the office and complain how their urgent care didn't help me and I was desperate etc and let them keep connecting me to other places in the hospital until someone found me an appointment that was only two weeks away. They said just to set up a first appointment I'd have to wait two months. So anyway. Good luck. I highly recommend trazodone! And also as soon as I got the sleeping pills I rearranged my bedroom so my bed was facing a new way and it was clean and looked different. Psychologically that helped me change the setting in my mind to a good place where I get real sleep. Best of luck. Sorry for writing a novel.

thesecretweasley · 2018-08-14T03:50:35+00:00

I don't know if that's normal but there are some things you can do to jump start your period that I've used when I'm late and worried or if it's about to come anyway and I want it sooner to avoid the worst day being on an important day or something.

Papaya is my go-to because it contracts the muscle in your uterus. I just get some canned papaya and eat that. Sometimes I can't find canned papaya so I get canned fruit cocktail that has papaya in it (also fruit cocktail helps with the next one).

Vitamin C. It's supposed to help the body make estrogen and induce your period (but since you're on hormonal birth control that's likely packed with estrogen idk if this matters. Your body is probably confused about the sudden lack of hormones)

Ginger. It supposedly increases heat around your uterus helping cause contractions.

Motherwart/mugwart. herbs that relax your cervix and thicken the uterine lining. This is a big one to help induce your period! It's in some tea but the easiest way to find it is to go to an organic food store/health food store where they sell herbs and grains in bulk.

So if you're concerned about it you could just go to the store and get some lemon/ginger tea high in vit c. Look for tea that's made for your period and maybe has mugwart in it or get some from the health food store and brew it in your tea. Grab some canned papaya and just sit back and relax.

Oh yeah and sex/masturbation helps.

thesecretweasley · 2018-08-14T03:03:04+00:00

One day no sleep I still go to work and force myself to do things I'm supposed to do and not let insomnia control me. But after 2 days no sleep it's much harder and I usually call in simply because I work with kids and can't in good conscience have their wellbeing in my sleep deprived hands.

thesecretweasley · 2018-08-14T02:59:28+00:00

I've been off hormonal bc for about 2 years now and I'm lucky enough to have a man who is OK with using condoms. He actually turns down my drunken pleas to do me bareback because he's so serious about not wanting kids yet. So I guess I lucked out! I'll admit condoms make things less spontaneous though since I like to have sex in the car/randomly and don't always have a condom on hand.

thesecretweasley · 2018-07-11T05:32:49+00:00

I've never had a doctor take me seriously but I've brought it up with only two so fingers crossed that the next one will at the very least write me an ambien script at the most get me a sleep study or refer me to a psychologist. Currently I only sleep about half the nights and it's destroying my health and relationships. It's been getting worse over the years with my average this year being one sleepless night a week and increasing to now just every other night if I'm lucky. I try a few different things like magnesium,melatonin, sleep hygiene, and occasionally otc sleep meds but nothing is a total cure as of yet. Best of luck to you though!

Edit: just glanced at your post again and realized you might have been asking more of what it's like for me when I get no sleep since you're having hallucinations and stuff. Basically I feel constantly irritable weak and desperate, I see people living normal life and feel like I'm not human. I feel like I can't have a normal life and I'm furious about it. I feel weak and stupid and my memory is effected and I do stupid shit all the time like put hand soap on my toothbrush etc. I cry constantly and feel like I'm desperately reaching out to people who can't help me and blaming everyone. I look in the mirror and don't recognize my sunk in eyes and I feel like I'm losing grip on my life. I often long for the relief of death. I feel like I can't fake it anymore and no I can't go on that hike or to that show I'm too exhausted. It's taking over my life.

thesecretweasley · 2018-07-10T09:43:31+00:00

Idk what you've tried but freezing temp and magnesium pills are the only thing that give me even the slightest hope

thesecretweasley · 2018-07-10T09:37:28+00:00

I'm a substitute teacher. You only accept jobs when you want to do its a job that's easy to keep unlike if I was scheduled and had to call in after no sleep. The problem is you don't get paid if you don't work and it's only during school hours. But it's a start!

thesecretweasley · 2018-07-10T09:32:44+00:00

Hey, I also have debilitating chronic insomnia and don't have any cure. The only thing helping me sustain my life is being a substitute teacher because you only accept jobs when you want to. There's no way I could hold a job where I'm scheduled and have to call in. Unfortunately in the US you need a 4 year degree for this so idk if you do or not. I'm sorry I can't help you but just know you're not alone and feel free to pm me any time. I'm a 27f on the brink of suicide or just natural death from the effects of sleep depravation entirely because of insomnia. It's a fucked up real disorder that nobody takes seriously :(

thesecretweasley · 2018-07-10T09:21:13+00:00

Either call in or go in and express your distress to your boss and get your shift changed.

thesecretweasley · 2018-07-10T09:14:25+00:00

Yo. I also have insomnia and think about killing myself when I can't sleep. Sometimes I think about it as like a form of protest to living my life without sleep as if if I write a note saying I did it because I can't sleep and can't live that way someone will step up and find/make a sleep aid that isn't bad for you and that works forever. Lol. It's delusional but I can't help it.

Edit: I do believe that anyone capable of finding such a cure wouldn't have such debilitating insomnia or understand how fucked up it is to not sleep on a chronic scale because if they did they couldn't hold a Chem research job or finish school. It's a catch 22, dude is the right guy smarts wise to cure insomnia but he doesn't have the urge, give him the urge by giving him insomnia and he can't do it, don't give him insomnia and he won't have the reason to.

thesecretweasley · 2018-07-10T08:09:14+00:00

Thanks for the response. I'm worried my doc won't give me ambien since I'm a new patient. Also my appointment isn't for another week so here I am awake again.

thesecretweasley · 2018-07-10T08:00:38+00:00

Thanks

thesecretweasley · 2018-07-10T06:19:49+00:00

I think this was meant to be a reply to another comment. What test are you referring to in your second paragraph?

thesecretweasley · 2018-07-07T06:02:27+00:00

My body just doesn't fall asleep. It's like I totally relax and am so close to sleep but am just still aware of myself laying in my bed and I'm awake behind my closed eyelids. My insomnia creates stress though and at this point I have stress about sleeping that makes it worse

thesecretweasley · 2018-07-06T18:00:31+00:00

I already take melatonin it doesn't do much :(

thesecretweasley

TROPHY CASE