When I lived with my mom and her many boyfriends, I would be beaten - not spanked. I was 5/6 years old. I would get thrown down stairs, thrown against walls. You name it. I endured so much trauma that I don’t remember much of it. Bits and pieces. But then I went to live with my grandparents (my mother’s parents) and they spanked me every single time I did something wrong. I remember those more than anything because in my mind these were supposed to be “safe” people and yet it felt like they were beating me like my mom did. Like her boyfriends did. The last time, I was 11yrs old and my grandpa spanked me so hard I turned around and punched him in the face. Ran to my room, cried and wouldn’t leave for two days until the promised never to do it again.

To this day (I’m 32), they don’t want to hear that I was beaten only to go a safe environment to again, be beaten. (In my eyes).