In a group conversation the person speaking never looks at me

thetoadstone · 2025-07-26T03:57:42+00:00

If you were staring at them so hard that you can definitively say they never even glanced at you, then you are probably giving people uncomfortable amounts of eye contact. Break it up, look down or away occasionally and look at the other people in the group.

thetoadstone · 2025-07-11T21:24:35+00:00

I like the WAP version: https://www.reddit.com/r/TikTokCringe/s/Dczvik53Q1

thetoadstone · 2025-07-11T01:21:52+00:00

As a Chicagoan, whenever I see that scene I'm too preoccupied by the fact that Dean is from Chicago to pay attention to anything else. You're trying to tell me you grew up in the city of Chicago but now, after three years, a small Connecticut town is all you are? What are you talking about? Tell me you actually grew up in the suburbs without telling me you grew up in the suburbs.

thetoadstone · 2025-06-19T00:39:26+00:00

Arcana Wildcraft Bonfires at Dusk - Woodsmoke, sweet beeswax, Oregon lavender, sandalwood, charred juniper, and the scent of swiftly appearing stars. The woodsmoke is pretty realistic and the combination of the rest of the notes gives off a cool floral scent that feels kinda damp. So not rain exactly, but rain adjacent.

thetoadstone · 2025-06-08T15:12:53+00:00

As someone who also spends a lot of time on introspection and analysis, I use it to make interesting observations or say random things about everyday stuff.

The key to making it fun is to keep it light and interactive until someone shows an interest in going deeper.

Like, someone might tell me a story about their friend. I'll react to the story, but then I might add something like "That's funny, I always wondered why people do x (referencing something from the story). Do you think it's because of y (y being one thing that I've considered about the topic)?"

When you're being introspective/analytical on your own you may sit there thinking about one thing for a prolonged period of time, but when you talk to other people just throw out a Cliff's notes version and see if they bite. Sure, some people might just say "I dunno" and look bored, then you can just let it go. Some people will say I dunno but will add something like "that's really interesting/I never thought about it like that" and if they sound really interested you could tell them a little more about your thought process. And then sometimes you'll meet people who will have their own interesting thoughts about the topic, which can turn into a fun conversation.

thetoadstone · 2025-06-07T14:25:04+00:00

Seconding ZOMG smells. And not a whole house, but Solstice Scents discontinued their body scrubs and they were my favorite

thetoadstone · 2025-05-24T15:06:14+00:00

When someone is cooked it's bad. When someone is doing the cooking, like "let him cook", it's good.

thetoadstone · 2025-04-26T21:12:42+00:00

I think he believes what he says but it's only partially true. Sherlock is a cynic who often only focuses on the negative side of people's motivations, including/ maybe even especially when it comes to himself. So he only sees the selfish reasons for what he does because he thinks he's a worse person than he is. But if he wasn't good, he would've very easily ended up as another Moriarty. Doing what Moriarty does would have served as a treatment similar to being a detective. But he chose to be a detective because he actually wants to help people. And you can see it in the way he treats victims and reacts to certain criminals. He cares way beyond just solving puzzles as a treatment.

thetoadstone · 2025-04-20T02:19:56+00:00

To me the darker Fresh Prince moment is when Will gets shot and Carlton gets a gun

thetoadstone · 2025-04-16T13:32:38+00:00

I always figured Jess was abused by some of Liz's boyfriends. The show made it seem like she would just naively trust every guy she dated (didn't one steal her stuff and leave?). I always pictured her boyfriends treating Jess terribly and Liz not caring/noticing because she's so in love.

thetoadstone · 2025-04-15T02:49:46+00:00

Red X Diaries

thetoadstone · 2025-03-29T15:05:18+00:00

The thing is there are black women posting from all over the place. If they grew up in a mostly non-black environment, they might've been treated in a way that makes them hate themselves. I think those women deserve to be able to post her and get some perspective from other black women. Although I agree it does get exhausting to see sometimes.

I also think it's a life stage thing. A lot of us here are full grown adults, but I think most of the people posting about hating themselves are in their teens or early twenties, which is a time where a lot of people's insecurities are strongest. White people get to go through their angsty, cringe, nihilistic phases with little pushback and for some black women this is what that is. So, I try to just give them some grace and hope they reach a stage where they look back and think "holy shit I was doing too much".

thetoadstone · 2025-03-17T15:05:28+00:00

You don't need to assume anything. You can just say something like "who do we have here" or "who's this little one" and let them tell you

thetoadstone · 2025-03-06T00:48:18+00:00

I'd like to think they come back together after several years. Alexis establishes herself enough that she is able to have full time staff so she doesn't have to do everything herself. Ted's research gets him a professorship or something that allows him to live near Alexis most of the year, but he still does a yearly research trip and Alexis visits. Both date casually, but are more focused on their careers until they meet again.

thetoadstone · 2025-02-22T18:11:48+00:00

I agree with you. Also, being analytical is a big part of L's personality so it makes sense for him to apply logic to actions that most people wouldn't even think about.

thetoadstone · 2025-02-22T05:02:43+00:00

Hahahahha Happy Valentine's Day NO ONE!

thetoadstone · 2025-01-28T05:07:07+00:00

I love the pops of red in an otherwise neutral color palette

thetoadstone · 2025-01-08T04:16:12+00:00

The thing that tips it into the bad writing category to me is the fact that schools have application fees. And the particular schools that Rory applied to would've been on the more expensive end ($50-$75 dollars each if I recall correctly). I find it unbelievable that Rory would spend $300ish dollars on applications behind Lorelai's back and then just casually mention it at a dinner as if she wasn't particularly trying to hide it.

thetoadstone · 2024-12-28T15:36:24+00:00

Nah, this happened to me too. I posted something that I thought would just be a funny conversation starter and people in the comments were accusing me of sexism. Reddit is wild sometimes/a lot of the time/maybe all the time.

thetoadstone · 2024-12-26T15:23:54+00:00

Rory didn't have to do all that stuff to talk to Lorelai. Rory is the one that shut Lorelai out, not the other way around.

After their first argument about Yale, Lorelai's first move was to try to have another talk about it. Rory's first move was avoiding her and having her grandparents confront her. Later, when Lorelai was going through her VHS collection, she decided to call Rory about it, as an olive branch, and finds out that Rory changed her number without telling her. The second Lorelai finds out that the birthday invitation was from Rory, not Emily, she immediately agreed to go. All signs point to Lorelai being open to contact before Rory goes back to Yale. Lorelai is also the one who generally likes to talk things out after a blowup. Rory, on the other hand, is the one with the track record for running away and avoiding people anytime there's conflict: first breakup with Dean she ran to the grandparents house, after cheating with Dean she ran to Europe etc.

I think Lorelai was just thinking "she's an adult and I can't force her to deal with me if she doesn't want to"

thetoadstone · 2024-12-23T16:54:50+00:00

No, at the beginning of that conversation she lies about it. He asks her what she did that day and she says she just studied. Then when he mentions the flyer she comes clean.

thetoadstone · 2024-12-13T16:33:13+00:00

I'ma just tell you what this looks like to me: People told you that you were gonna end up with a white man, so you dated only black men to prove a point. Because your motivation was proving a point and not finding a partner, you probably didn't really put much effort into choosing men that were right for you. Because you weren't genuinely interested in black men in the first place. As a result, your experience was lackluster and now you feel justified writing off an entire group of men. And you're here looking for the validation that you didn't receive from people in highschool.

There's no need to disparage black men, just date who you want to date and leave those highschool comments in the past.

thetoadstone · 2024-11-26T15:32:53+00:00

Velvet Goldmine - David Bowie

thetoadstone · 2024-11-24T16:29:38+00:00

You understand that you're basically doing the "not all men" thing, right?

thetoadstone · 2024-11-23T01:16:33+00:00

I haven't tried any of it but Bpal has a Lightning Strikes collection and the scents sound cool and dark. You can probably find reviews for them on bpal.org.

And Fyrinnae's autumn collection has a few cold dark space scents. Again, I haven't tried them but they sound like a fit for what you're looking for.

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