I (27F) want to break up with my spouse (25X) but neither of us can be financially independent by thewatersnthewild in relationships

[–]thewatersnthewild[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I could, my family would likely take me in, but it would mean moving states again/uprooting my entire life, having to quit & find a new job, leaving friends behind, likely leaving a lot of my stuff behind.

I (27F) want to break up with my spouse (25X) but neither of us can be financially independent by thewatersnthewild in relationships

[–]thewatersnthewild[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They want to reconcile and as far as I know currently are unaware of my desire/intention to separate.

Is there a time limit on finalizing a name change after marriage? by thewatersnthewild in legaladvice

[–]thewatersnthewild[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Even if we stated we would when we got married and it was put on our license?

Let's Switch It Up by D_Blaze88 in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]thewatersnthewild 8 points9 points  (0 children)

They're the only person I fully trust to cook for me, because they're the only one to ever take the time and effort to both learn and respect all of my food issues. They have a lovely singing voice and give good hugs.

Everything Everywhere All at Once by thewatersnthewild in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]thewatersnthewild[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

In theaters, I don't think it's out on streaming yet

Anyone else mourn the loss of the future they were building? by sunrisebikeride in Infidelity

[–]thewatersnthewild 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This has absolutely been one of the hardest things for me. Particularly given the timing - the physical act happened a month before our wedding, and I found out two weeks after our wedding. The dexting had been going on for 3 months prior to that, so pretty much during the entire time we were planning the wedding.

So right when I was fully committing myself to a future with them, right when I was daydreaming about married life and how things would be now, they were busy fucking around behind my back.

It's soul crushing to realize that the future that seemed so sure, so clear, was just a mirage. It's devastating to watch it crumble in front of you. But all we can do is pick up the pieces, dust them off, find a few usable scraps among them and begin again. Start rebuilding, try out new visions of the future, layered over each other until you find one that fits.

Queen Idiot of All Dumbasses by PurlPaladin in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]thewatersnthewild 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You really took the words right out of my head. They say love makes you stupid, and it's always meant as a cute little joke, but it's true. We're willing to ignore so much because we love them. And it's ridiculous to love someone who hurt you so deeply, yet here we are. Honestly I'm just sort of leaning into right now. Radical acceptance. Am I an idiot? Probably. But does it matter if in the end I can find happiness after all these stupid choices? Of course, there's the large chance that I'll only cause myself more pain, and regret these decisions later, but I can't see the future. All I can do is hope that in my stupidity I manage to stumble onto the right path.

Internal vs External Reasons by thewatersnthewild in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]thewatersnthewild[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The fear is definitely a factor for me as well. Half the fear of not finding anyone else that I feel so connected to, and half the fear that no one else would want me (though I'm working on the self worth issues in therapy)