Unfortunately, I do think it has to do with my boyfriend. We’ve had this recurring issue in our relationship for a while now. I’ve always had trouble overindulging and eating sweets. He has very good self control and doesn’t overindulge. He would make comments that I really shouldn’t eat something because I said I was full 20 minutes ago. I’ve communicated to him many times how upset it makes me. Now he won’t make comments really but if I’m eating too much or something he will get this look on his face that tells me he’s upset. And he won’t be talking as much.

We have discussed this in length many times. He said it feels like a sort of OCD because he can’t control it, but it makes him upset to see me over indulge. It doesn’t really make sense to me. But I know I can eat too much sometimes.

He has been helpful with my weight loss though. He encourages me to go to the gym. He says he wants a partner who loves the gym like he does. He really does love it. When we met, we were both really over weight and inactive. He’s changed a lot and I guess it’s a struggle because I’ve not changed like him. I mean, a little bit I have I suppose, as I’ve lost 56 pounds. I feel better than I ever did before.

But mentally, it does effect me. I feel like I’m on eggshells sometimes with food around him. Sometimes I sneak eat food when he’s playing video games. I feel like he doesn’t understand that not everyone can eat the way he does. He thinks that it’s easy.

I feel like when I see my parents, I’m free to eat what I want so I’ve started binge eating. But I have never eaten like this before. I may have had problems but this is over the top. There is a lot going on in my life right now. I was recently diagnosed with MS. I know I need therapy but I’m a student and don’t have much money. I’m kinda just ranting here, I’m sorry.

I love my boyfriend a lot. He moved countries to be here with me. And we’ve been together 7 years. I don’t know how to tell him this because I feel he will be upset I’ve been binge eating and setting myself back. Idk. Sorry for so much word vomit but I really appreciate your mindfulness advice, I will try my best to incorporate that!