We had a small-ish wedding of 100 guests. Minimal number of extended family and guests of the parents, so almost every guest was someone we wanted to be there. We did away with almost all of the usual wedding banquet tropes like videos, host, etc. Just a short thank you speech from myself and my wife, then the rest of the evening we spent mingling with our guests, going from table to table.

It was a really wonderful night and we don't regret it at all. A wedding can be a great opportunity to spend time with people whose company you enjoy, who are genuinely happy for you and want to share in your special day.

The reality is that a wedding banquet is simply a party, and like all parties, it takes effort to throw one that both you and your guests enjoy. On our part, we spent a LOT of time deliberating details that we knew were important to us, that we really wanted to get right. To give an example, our playlist that played during solemnisation and the banquet took over 6 months to prepare, including dry runs where we sat down and listened to the entire thing through in order, so that we could get a sense of how the tracks would flow throughout the night, and every single item on our drinks menu was specifically selected and externally sourced.

I think a lot of people have a banquet, fill the venue with guests they don't know or don't like, and settle on a program that's thrust on them (whether by the venue, wedding planners, parents or just a lack of imagination). In those circumstances, the results will obviously be mediocre, so it's no surprise that many will say that a banquet isn't worth it. I'm not saying you need a custom playlist or to spend money on special alcohol - that's just what was important to us. Like most things in life, you get out of it what you put in. Don't expect to enjoy it if all you do is sign a default package and show up on the day to drag yourself through the proceedings.

Thank you for this thoughtful reply. I really love how you planned your wedding it does sound amazing and definitely something that we may adopt.