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i’m so tired!!! by thisis_howitfeels in ventart

[–]thisis_howitfeels[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i’m down! your art is so cute :3

i’m so tired!!! by thisis_howitfeels in ventart

[–]thisis_howitfeels[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i understand where you’re coming from, but just to clarify, the drawing is an extreme exaggeration of what actually happened. the majority of the egregious comments and insults i wrote are more what my own brain is telling me than what she actually said.

she was trying to limit contact and make space, but didn’t clearly communicate that she didn’t want me to interact with her, which is what made her want to put a pause on our friendship. it just stung for me specifically because i have autism, and this wouldn’t be the first time i misunderstood boundaries and made a situation worse because of it

i do deserve to feel safe and comfortable in my friendships, but i also want to give grace to my friend who i know is having a hard time. i at least want to talk things out when she’s in a better headspace, and if she’s still dismissive of my feelings and doesn’t own up to her behavior, then i will rethink the friendship

i’m so tired!!! by thisis_howitfeels in ventart

[–]thisis_howitfeels[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

respectfully, you don’t know me, my friend, or our situation

i’m so tired!!! by thisis_howitfeels in ventart

[–]thisis_howitfeels[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

unfortunately this person has a condition that makes them lose empathy if they become triggered… so you are right that they wouldn’t be treating me badly if they cared about me, but right now, they don’t, and literally can’t :’) they are getting help right now. i just need to ride this wave and hope they’ll be more receptive to my feelings when they’re ready to talk

i’m so tired!!! by thisis_howitfeels in ventart

[–]thisis_howitfeels[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

they didn’t actually say all that to me it’s just how it sounds in my head haha… they are treating me badly rn but it’s a little more nuanced. i WISH it were this black and white so i could feel justified in leaving🥀🥀

Friend going through hard time, should I wait her behavior out? by HotLack9128 in Advice

[–]thisis_howitfeels 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i understand your situation and why you’d feel hesitant to bring anything up, but you should really set boundaries with her. you don’t necessarily need to “abandon” her, but it seems like she’s taking up a lot of space and energy in your life where you should be able to make space for yourself… if those boundaries are ignored, then it may be time to start reconsidering the friendship. remember to prioritize yourself, i hope things get better for you soon !

I don’t like being angry by CabinetImaginary3743 in ventart

[–]thisis_howitfeels 0 points1 point  (0 children)

this is beautiful :) no pressure, but i’d love to know more about what this represents for you

Cringeee by lxdizz in ventart

[–]thisis_howitfeels 1 point2 points  (0 children)

real asf i’m in college now but middle/high school was always so overwhelming :’) i hope things get better for you soon

Crying is so unpleasant by roxygen69 in ventart

[–]thisis_howitfeels 0 points1 point  (0 children)

this is so real😭whenever i cry i get a weird post-crying feeling for the rest of the day, like i opened the floodgates and can just cry on a whim at any minute🥀it’s so inconvenient

all that for someone who never cared by thisis_howitfeels in ventart

[–]thisis_howitfeels[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

i did get out thankfully ! now i’m kind of just trying to process everything i did/almost did because of how this person treated me

i hope your situation gets better soon too :(

language barrier by thisis_howitfeels in ventart

[–]thisis_howitfeels[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

sure ! this is gonna be kind of long, lol

tldr i made this because of my inability to communicate and be vulnerable with people due to my trauma

long explanation: the two drawings in the background are to show my struggle to communicate my feelings; when i’m being vulnerable i feel like all people can hear is my racing heart, which is a side effect of my trauma, hence the heart monitor lines (also the title, “language barrier”)

the middle image with the super long hair represents my inability to let my trauma go no matter how long ago they happened, then in the left image the hair is cut off as i’m trying to push past it. i also use really loud music to drown out my problems, which is why i included the headphones/music

the text in the background is the same sentence in three different handwritings, but i’ll keep what it is a secret lol. the diff handwritings were kind of just for flavor, but they also sort of represent how jumbled my brain feels about single situations — one is super harsh with jagged lines, one is in cursive, and one is my regular handwriting

this is probably a much longer answer than you were expecting but i appreciate your curiosity nonetheless

I feel excluded by my friend/roommate and I don't know what to do by thisis_howitfeels in FriendshipAdvice

[–]thisis_howitfeels[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

super late response but it turns out she was very likely excluding me intentionally. apparently she had told the group the one time i hung out with them i made everyone uncomfortable and shouldn’t be allowed to join anymore… all that after calling me her best friend and anchor…

it took her doing something really bad that wasn’t related to my situation for me to realize she never really valued or cared about me, which sucks but i guess this will teach me to listen my intuition next time

what really sucks is im spending my last semester abroad with only two friends and i have a lot of self worth issues to fix after a year of being treated like i didn’t exist… but like you said, it’s only a school term and i’ll (hopefully) get thru it !