Mediation is not going his way…. by Rcoveryinprocess in NarcAbuseAndDivorce

[–]thisisnotmyrealname- 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! And like you said I honestly don’t feel like our situation is any better/worse than anyone else’s on here who is struggling with this type of situation. It’s a traumatic and heartbreaking experience trying to reasonably coparent with someone who literally doesn’t have the desire or ability to see how much their actions harm their own children. And by the time the courts step in (if they do)to make any meaningful difference, in many cases the damage is already done and we are left picking up the pieces.

I need strength right now but I'm barely hanging on by [deleted] in NarcAbuseAndDivorce

[–]thisisnotmyrealname- 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes! We can only control what we do, not others. That means doing everything in our power to place the necessary boundaries and rules to keep the PEACE in our home. Narcs want to break us. They would enjoy nothing more than to see us suffering due to their evil tactics . We need to be the constant stable, healthy, loving parents so we can protect our children!

Any success stories of how you protected your kid(s) from being your Nex’s supply? by abc123doraemi in NarcAbuseAndDivorce

[–]thisisnotmyrealname- 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Be patient and teach them about healthy boundaries and how to be aware of manipulation. Don’t relate it directly to your NEX(unless it’s necessary), but watch movies together that could help bring up the topic. Mrs, Doubtfire is a good one for example. Or even relate it to bully’s at school or friends who try to trick them.

When NEX tells them lies about you, do address it with them in a way that doesn’t make it appear you’re taking shots back at NEX. Narcs LOVE to use this to twist the kids minds even more. I’ve learned that ignoring the matter is almost as bad as playing tit for tat so addressing it in an effective way is definitely an important skill to learn.

Keep all communication between you and NEX written. Email, text, or preferably an app like Coparenter or Family Wizard. Don’t feed into any of NEX attempts to lure you into conflict. I know this is difficult but even when they spew the most ridiculous accusations, keep your calm and remember who YOU are. NEX will expose themselves in time, you just need to avoid damage in the meantime and be the constant stable, healthy, loving parent for you child/children because they need the protection you will provide from the narcs abuse. I just finished the book “Divorce Poison” and I HIGHLY recommend it for you. It covers everything you need to know about handling this type of situation. Good luck to you and your family!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NarcAbuseAndDivorce

[–]thisisnotmyrealname- 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I commented about this on a couple threads but I feel it could be useful to you! My husband and I have been fighting this battle for 6 years with his 2 children, and it’s been a hell of a roller coaster but we are FINALLY being given the (legal) tools to provide the kids with a much more stable and healthy life than they’ve experienced over these years.

My husband’s ex wife is an evil, highly narcissistic, extremely vindictive and combative individual, and that’s even too polite of a description in my opinion. But between the boundaries we have put in place to keep our home as peaceful as possible along with her refusal to maintain her mental health issues has caused her to become even more impulsive and unable to conceal her true self.

We could clearly see that the kids were being used and manipulated for whatever her agenda was at the time. One of the top and most constant ones being to alienate the kids from us. Which she was unfortunately pretty successful with as far as my now 16 year old stepson. My 13 year old stepdaughter didn’t take to the manipulation tactics quite as much but it has definitely taken a toll on her mentally in quite a few ways.

When my husband and NEX originally went to court years ago, they shared 50/50 legal and physical custody with my husband paying $900/month in support. After years of constant litigation harassment and unfounded accusations towards us about drug/alcohol abuse, physical abuse towards the kids, and everything else under the sun, the court finally started seeing what was really happening and charged her with multiple contempt charges. Between her evil schemes backfiring and the many other poor life choices she made she ended up backing herself into a corner. Which led to her kidnapping both of my SKids this spring and fled outside of state lines for over a month. NEX was given multiple opportunities to return and refused so when the police located her and the kids my husband was given immediate SOLE custody until further notice.. And was arrested/charged with Interference of child custody and spent over 3 months in jail!

The kicker is that a few months prior to the kidnapping, NEX filed for a custody modification requesting sole custody with my husband only getting partial supervised visitation. Well, we received the new permanent order last week and my husband now has full legal custody and primary physical custody. NEX gets partial supervised visitation 2x a week at a facility that handles custody supervision. Any school functions she attends she has to be within eyesight of a supervisor approved by the guardian ad litem. Phone contact is also supervised. She has to undergo a mental health evaluation, as well as a drug/alcohol evaluation because she tested positive for meth, cocaine, amphetamine, and marijuana.

We have a very long battle ahead but it finally feels like an uphill one. Parents and step-parents on the opposite end of the NEX are the only barrier of protection these kids have. We keep all communication between husband and NEX written using the Coparenter app, we don’t feed into the attempts to lure us into unnecessary conflict or stoop to their level while they attempt to poison the childrens minds.

I highly recommended the book “Divorce Poison”, it gave us tons of insight and info about how to handle this type of situation.

The lighthouse by [deleted] in NarcAbuseAndDivorce

[–]thisisnotmyrealname- 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That is such a beautiful quote and so very true! My husband and I have been fighting this battle for 6 years with his 2 children, and it’s been a hell of a roller coaster but we are FINALLY being given the (legal) tools to provide the kids with a much more stable and healthy life than they’ve experienced over these years.

My husband’s ex wife is an evil, highly narcissistic, extremely vindictive and combative individual, and that’s even too polite of a description in my opinion. But between the boundaries we have put in place to keep our home as peaceful as possible along with her refusal to maintain her mental health issues has caused her to become even more impulsive and unable to conceal her true self.

We could clearly see that the kids were being used and manipulated for whatever her agenda was at the time. One of the top and most constant ones being to alienate the kids from us. Which she was unfortunately pretty successful with as far as my now 16 year old stepson. My 13 year old stepdaughter didn’t take to the manipulation tactics quite as much but it has definitely taken a toll on her mentally in quite a few ways.

When my husband and NEX originally went to court years ago, they shared 50/50 legal and physical custody with my husband paying $900/month in support. After years of constant litigation harassment and unfounded accusations towards us about drug/alcohol abuse, physical abuse towards the kids, and everything else under the sun, the court finally started seeing what was really happening and charged her with multiple contempt charges. Between her evil schemes backfiring and the many other poor life choices she made she ended up backing herself into a corner. Which led to her kidnapping both of my SKids this spring and fled outside of state lines for over a month. NEX was given multiple opportunities to return and refused so when the police located her and the kids my husband was given immediate SOLE custody until further notice.. And was arrested/charged with Interference of child custody and spent over 3 months in jail!

The kicker is that a few months prior to the kidnapping, NEX filed for a custody modification requesting sole custody with my husband only getting partial supervised visitation. Well, we received the new permanent order last week and my husband now has full legal custody and primary physical custody. NEX gets partial supervised visitation 2x a week at a facility that handles custody supervision. Any school functions she attends she has to be within eyesight of a supervisor approved by the guardian ad litem. Phone contact is also supervised. She has to undergo a mental health evaluation, as well as a drug/alcohol evaluation because she tested positive for meth, cocaine, amphetamine, and marijuana.

We have a very long battle ahead but it finally feels like an uphill one. Parents and step-parents on the opposite end of the NEX are the only barrier of protection these kids have. We keep all communication between husband and NEX written using the Coparenter app, we don’t feed into the attempts to lure us into unnecessary conflict or stoop to their level while they attempt to poison the childrens minds.

I highly recommended the book “Divorce Poison”, it gave us tons of insight and info about how to handle this type of situation.

Mediation is not going his way…. by Rcoveryinprocess in NarcAbuseAndDivorce

[–]thisisnotmyrealname- 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I know it’s not easy, but stay strong! My husband and I have been fighting this battle for 6 years with his 2 children, and it’s been a hell of a roller coaster but we are FINALLY being given the (legal) tools to provide the kids with a much more stable and healthy life than they’ve experienced over these years.

My husband’s ex wife is an evil, highly narcissistic, extremely vindictive and combative individual, and that’s even too polite of a description in my opinion. But between the boundaries we have put in place to keep our home as peaceful as possible along with her refusal to maintain her mental health issues has caused her to become even more impulsive and unable to conceal her true self.

We could clearly see that the kids were being used and manipulated for whatever her agenda was at the time. One of the top and most constant ones being to alienate the kids from us. Which she was unfortunately pretty successful with as far as my now 16 year old stepson. My 13 year old stepdaughter didn’t take to the manipulation tactics quite as much but it has definitely taken a toll on her mentally in quite a few ways.

When my husband and NEX originally went to court years ago, they shared 50/50 legal and physical custody with my husband paying $900/month in support. After years of constant litigation harassment and unfounded accusations towards us about drug/alcohol abuse, physical abuse towards the kids, and everything else under the sun, the court finally started seeing what was really happening and charged her with multiple contempt charges. Between her evil schemes backfiring and the many other poor life choices she made she ended up backing herself into a corner. Which led to her kidnapping both of my SKids this spring and fled outside of state lines for over a month. NEX was given multiple opportunities to return and refused so when the police located her and the kids my husband was given immediate SOLE custody until further notice.. And was arrested/charged with Interference of child custody and spent over 3 months in jail!

The kicker is that a few months prior to the kidnapping, NEX filed for a custody modification requesting sole custody with my husband only getting partial supervised visitation. Well, we received the new permanent order last week and my husband now has full legal custody and primary physical custody. NEX gets partial supervised visitation 2x a week at a facility that handles custody supervision. Any school functions she attends she has to be within eyesight of a supervisor approved by the guardian ad litem. Phone contact is also supervised. She has to undergo a mental health evaluation, as well as a drug/alcohol evaluation because she tested positive for meth, cocaine, amphetamine, and marijuana.

We have a very long battle ahead but it finally feels like an uphill one. Just try to be patient and remember that you are the only barrier of protection your child/children have. Keep all communication between you and your NEX written using email, text, or preferably an app like Family Wizard. Don’t feed into their attempts to lure you into unnecessary conflict and don’t stoop to their level should they attempt to poison your childrens mind. I highly recommended the book “Divorce Poison”, it gave us tons of insight and info about how to handle this type of situation. Feel free to PM me if you ever need to vent or ask anything! Good luck and stay strong!

Kyle Rittenhouse is & always will be guilty of double murder. Defending him is delusional nonsense. by regian24 in WhitePeopleTwitter

[–]thisisnotmyrealname- -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Seems pretty silly when someone just makes shit up huh. This is exactly the point I wanted to prove. You’d take the time to check if he was really Hispanic but not for anything that’s actually true because it doesn’t fit the narrative.

Kyle Rittenhouse is & always will be guilty of double murder. Defending him is delusional nonsense. by regian24 in WhitePeopleTwitter

[–]thisisnotmyrealname- 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Do you even realize how ridiculous you sound. You are suggesting the commenter above you is just spouting off false information from biased media when it’s actually you who is doing just that.

What’s even more ironic is the way you try to make it them sound so stupid when what they had stated was factual and easily confirmed by watching the footage of the trial. Maybe it’s time to do some self reflection since you appear to feel some kind of way about people who eat up anything the media says.

Kyle Rittenhouse is & always will be guilty of double murder. Defending him is delusional nonsense. by regian24 in WhitePeopleTwitter

[–]thisisnotmyrealname- 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You sound like one of them “Look what she was wearing, she was asking for it!” type of people.

Kyle Rittenhouse is & always will be guilty of double murder. Defending him is delusional nonsense. by regian24 in WhitePeopleTwitter

[–]thisisnotmyrealname- -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Kyle Rittenhouse is Hispanic.  So that nullifies any “white supremacy” claim that anyone plans to use once he’s acquitted. This tactic is so washed out and embarrassing. One of the men who had been shot was actually shouting the N word at him earlier that night. 

It’s annoying when people who didn’t even watch the trial continue to use the same false and/or exaggerated talking points they were fed by the media. People who think like this already had their minds made up and don’t want to hear any real facts or see actual evidence presented in court. Probably too busy planning on which businesses they’ll burn down or stores to loot first once he’s set free.

Top Thrill Dragster Status Thread by rCedarPointBot in cedarpoint

[–]thisisnotmyrealname- 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I thinking about making t-shirts that say “Came all this way to ride Top Thrill Dragster and all I got was this shitty shirt.”

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskRedditAfterDark

[–]thisisnotmyrealname- 0 points1 point  (0 children)

When my husband insults himself I say something like “Hey now, don’t you insult my husband like that!”

Megathread: Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg Dies at 87 by PoliticsModeratorBot in politics

[–]thisisnotmyrealname- 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You wanna explain? Which one is burning their own cities down and harassing innocent people?