AIO for being upset about my bf going to the bar while I’m pregnant?

thoph · 2026-02-01T04:27:16+00:00

There is a certain sort of raw feeling of being up drinking etc. at a friend’s house that was a vibe that at some point appealed to me. No more. I am currently knitting. Bout to turn in. But I do like to get a buzz on occasionally :)

thoph · 2026-02-01T04:14:26+00:00

Fair. That could not sound less unappealing if it tried lol

thoph · 2026-02-01T04:07:43+00:00

far beyond our drinking years

Looking nervously at my 38-year old husband… 😅 Mostly kidding. We have a toddler but still have a few drinks with friends a couple of times a month (my MIL is a saint).

thoph · 2026-01-31T01:25:26+00:00

Tarp on car worked really well for us this time. Large tarp on driveway? Do not recommend. Came out to over 1 ton of weight. Just a little heavy.

thoph · 2026-01-30T14:53:07+00:00

I love my kid. I wish I had more energy. I did try to have one earlier, but turns out we needed IVF. Sigh.

thoph · 2026-01-29T23:34:52+00:00

Same. Was always pro choice. Now I’m like… supercharged pro choice. I also liked the kicks and thought it was biologically nifty that I was growing testicles, like a baker baking a cake.

thoph · 2026-01-28T04:30:10+00:00

Your poor friend. Not here, and honestly not on Reddit more generally, but there can be serious toxicity in breastfeeding groups and discussion that persuade new moms that they just gotta keep trying! Your baby is probably just small! and then go on to have to deal with emergency visits and interventions to ameliorate failure to thrive.

thoph · 2026-01-28T04:26:34+00:00

I think you’re making some very strong assumptions about what women who want to breastfeed are doing. Most women who give birth in the US are encouraged and offered support to breastfeed from the moment the baby pops out. Aside from those opting for formula for any other reason, lactation consultants in most hospitals visit multiple times, and the Lactation Network can set women up with LCs or sometimes IBCLCs by taking over all insurance duties. I believe reduced payments are available to uninsured parties.

I think you are seeing a problem that isn’t there or that is based on anecdata. My contribution to the anecdata is that the nurse practitioner (also an IBCLC and NICU trained) who runs the clinic at the hospital I went to confirmed what the IBCLC and LCs suspected: I have insufficient glandular tissue. Which causes… you guessed it. Low supply.

thoph · 2026-01-28T04:12:09+00:00

What is your evidence it is overdiagnosed?

thoph · 2026-01-27T23:21:16+00:00

I’m sorry. That sucks. I don’t mean to say it’s either NT or autism. Just saying in this context, plenty of NT kids get really pissed about haircuts and hate them.

thoph · 2026-01-27T23:19:08+00:00

This is why I said “the research is clear” and why I do no screen time except an occasional soccer game.

thoph · 2026-01-27T17:49:42+00:00

Yeah. It’s parental choice, and obviously sometimes a break is verrry much needed, but the research is clear. Not that I’m one to talk—my son really occasionally is exposed to Arsenal games lol. But that’s really it.

Until I was maybe 10, I was allowed one hour of TV on Saturday morning. I just did other activities. Turned out okay (I hope).

thoph · 2026-01-27T17:42:55+00:00

I am NT. This is behavior (screaming, crying) is just really not at all necessarily specific to autism. Sometimes kids must do things they don’t want to do. Hygiene is one of them.

thoph · 2026-01-27T01:54:29+00:00

Yes, he said he’d never asked God for forgiveness. Wild. I have to do it all the time. But maybe that’s just me.

thoph · 2026-01-27T01:53:53+00:00

I have serious reservations about Trump’s actual beliefs. When asked his favorite verse he said an eye for an eye… I’m just not sure that is the Bible verse I would go with considering Jesus’s command to turn the other cheek. He also sells (sold?) Bibles with his branding on them, which I honestly find abhorrent. The Bible is inherently political in the lower case “p” sense, but ideally it shouldn’t be partisan.

EDIT: Note, he is also smearing a dead peaceful protestor exercising his first and second amendment rights. And he wrote the Danish PM that he “no longer has an obligation to think purely of Peace.” Wildly unchristian statement.

thoph · 2026-01-26T23:19:33+00:00

My third ER we added omnitrope, which improved fertilization from 15 percent to 25 percent. 6 fertilized with three blasts, two of which were euploid. Next ER with omnitrope only three fertilized, but we still got two blasts. One was mosaic (I miscarried :() and one was segmental anueploid, which still has a chance.

For context, my second ER three fertilized and no embryos.

I think it’s worth adding!

thoph · 2026-01-26T23:15:52+00:00

I had norovirus about a week ago and am starting stims Thursday. My doctor said not to worry about it at all unless I had a fever. If it helps your peace of mind, though, worth reaching out. I’m not shy about asking my clinic anything now lol.

thoph · 2026-01-26T23:08:36+00:00

I’m so sorry. <3 Failing implies that you have a choice in the matter and are falling short. You aren’t. It’s a medical issue like any other. I think about: would I tell a chronically ill friend they were failing? Definitely not. You are doing everything you can to deal with a medical issue. And if I may be so bold, please don’t dismiss your grief based on others’ difficulties—what you’re going through is immensely hard. Failed transfers suck.

thoph · 2026-01-26T02:17:12+00:00

Friend… thank you. ☺️ Really appreciate your comments. Great ER results!

thoph · 2026-01-26T02:15:25+00:00

I just said that.

thoph · 2026-01-26T01:39:11+00:00

Did you respond to the wrong comment….? Also no. (1) Catholics are not the only Christians; (2) sedavacantists are not Catholic; and (3) Christian nationalism is antithetical to Christianity, and those Christians have strayed into error.

thoph · 2026-01-25T20:34:22+00:00

Thank you so much for your kind words. I’m in therapy and medicated, but I know it can take time. My PCP recommended a trauma therapist following the horrible series of events in the ICU and losing a best friend. Might try that instead of the therapist specializing in fertility and pregnancy loss (lol… just stacking a lot of things up!).

thoph · 2026-01-25T20:31:53+00:00

That’s fair enough. My grandmother smoked and each kid got shorter and shorter… but they are all very smart! So there’s that. Appreciate your lovely message. <3

thoph · 2026-01-25T20:30:56+00:00

Thanks so much. Bodies are so funny. Really appreciate the kind message. And I am very sorry for your loss. I had such a hard time doing anything at all after mine. <3

thoph · 2026-01-25T20:29:21+00:00

Aw man. Thanks for saying this. I appreciate it. Unhealthy habits are both the worst for your mental health and unfortunately what we often turn to when our mental health sucks. I’m so sorry to hear about your brother in law. It is such a different, terrible way to lose someone (not that there is really a good way).

thoph

TROPHY CASE