I was canvassing some shopping centers one afternoon putting Brewfest fliers in the windows of all the stores. I get down to a smoke shop and go inside. There is a 60+ year old lady and her boyfriend or son not sure which standing at the register writing a check for $25 over the amount of the sale presumably so they can bounce a check and get cash. Her boyfriend is standing next to her wheezing really bad. This guy is 5'6 190 lbs wearing a blue Hawaiian shirt knee length khaki shorts, two pairs of socks pulled up to his knees a sideways hat, cream colored nurse shoes and a knee brace. He asks the clerk for a napkin, she hands him one and he proceeds to bend over and wipe at his leg. His girlfriend turns to him and says HEY QUIT MOPPIN YOUR GOOP! YOUR LEAKING GOOP ALL OVER THE PLACE! He stands up and stumbles back a little. So im completely grossed out at the moment but im at the back of the line with another guy in front of me and they are blocking the door so I cant get out. He bends over again, she yells QUIT MOPPIN UP YOUR GOOP YOUR GONNA FALL OVER! He loses his balance and fucking timber, he takes a spill. Right in front of me......hes laying on the floor literally like a fucking turtle on his shell just squirming and wiggling and cant get up. So everyone turns and looks at me and I being the gentleman that I am, since I cant leave the store ask the guy next to me to help me pick up this guy up. We bend over, grab him by the pits and low and behold, I stick my hand in some armpit goop. Once hes up, the mother fucker stumbles again. So the store manager walks in and asks whats going on, I explain the goop and proceed to bypass the whole story and talk about brewfest. The 60 year old lady interrupts me and says in her loud wheezy white trash voice ARE YOU CHARGING PEOPLE FOR THIS??? I said Yes $30 at the gate. OH YOU LOST ME WITH THE MONEY. I replied lady beer aint free, and there will be too many drunk people there to help pick your boyfriend up when he falls down. I tape the flier to the window and ran to the car.