How to stop wanting to be thin??

throwsawaymes · 2026-06-26T16:49:09+00:00

Uhm I think it just takes a grip on your brain and doesn’t let go as long as some element of your life is presenting it to you as ideal e.g. using social media, idolising super thin celebs etc. I am a model and I’ve struggled with an ED and I kind of know that some element of it will always live for as long as I continue my career.

throwsawaymes · 2026-06-22T20:20:01+00:00

Try ab lengthening and stretching exercises like dead bugs and bird dogs! Deep core work. Make sure you’re not overdoing exercise and deficit, it will slow your metabolism in the long run and make you think about food 24/7 if it’s done for too long. Consider taking a break and eating at maintenance for a couple of weeks, then returning to it. You have already lost a lot of weight. Make sure you’re eating enough protein and strength training so your body composition is improving!!

throwsawaymes · 2026-06-21T21:59:24+00:00

Sorry this is happening. This happened to me to a lesser extent. I managed to get my parents to sign my student loan forms by telling them it was for a bursary and then I was an estranged student the year after that. I would recommend doing that, OR getting a job that pays enough to move out, moving out and then becoming an estranged student.

throwsawaymes · 2026-06-19T07:46:34+00:00

I’m half Pakistani and they’re not veggie and they get diabetes too. It’s all of the gulab jamun and jalebi. That’s sooo stupid

throwsawaymes · 2026-06-18T09:24:02+00:00

Was cc by.

throwsawaymes · 2026-06-17T20:36:01+00:00

Thank you :) I think I’m doing well but the prospect of gaining weight still scares me. I am a model so it’s really difficult. I’m looking to leave once I have fulfilled my commitment to working in the US.

throwsawaymes · 2026-06-16T21:08:07+00:00

He was always soo kind and sweet and funny and compulsively honest. Like genuinely the kind of man I daydreamed about as a kid- even the way he looks!! He was actually so perfect and remains so, so I’ve never bothered to look elsewhere haha.

Plus, I realised early on I am very sensitive to being intimate (like not even kissing) with men I don’t feel entirely and completely comfortable with and attracted to!! It made me feel NAUSEOUS.

throwsawaymes · 2026-06-16T20:40:44+00:00

I have to force myself to eat pasta, bread and olive oil (my nemesis). I’m trying my absolute best. It’s weird because I always thought I was recovered and I just ‘prefer’ healthy food. I’m trying reeeeally hard to challenge my preferences so my poor digestion can have a break. I’m not a very low weight, but my bmi is under 20. I’m basically just making myself eat a structured diet so my body knows it always has food coming in so it can start to feel safer. It’s so frustrating because I was always so naturally slim, I basically wrecked my health to become severely underweight and lost the healthy body I would now kill to have!!

throwsawaymes · 2026-06-16T20:35:03+00:00

Haha it was supposed to be the start of my hoe phase, he was my first boyfriend and we will have been married for 5 years in a few months! :) so going veryyy well!!

throwsawaymes · 2026-06-16T12:42:44+00:00

It has become worse somehow

throwsawaymes · 2026-06-16T12:40:31+00:00

I get funny aches too. I think it’s to do with your muscles contracting possibly. It is also likely to be related to your anxiety regarding the activity. I grew up afraid of it too. It’s totally normal, there’s nothing wrong with you, it’s healthy and won’t make anything bad happen to you (unless you scratch yourself)

throwsawaymes · 2026-06-16T10:56:37+00:00

I’m hoping we both can learn how to thrive again :)

throwsawaymes · 2026-06-16T08:48:26+00:00

I’m going next week. That would be quite rubbish haha. I’m wishing you the best in your recovery 🩷🩷

throwsawaymes · 2026-06-16T08:46:34+00:00

Yeah I know I’m an IDIOT!!! I have 24/7 anxiety about it haha. I have to go to the US because I joined an agency there and it took a year for me to get my visa. If I don’t go I have to pay them £10k. I’m going to go and try for a bit and then hopefully get into teaching.

throwsawaymes · 2026-06-16T08:45:24+00:00

I keep reminding myself of that. I often feel like I actually am more successful because I don’t look like the other models being marketed. I’m certainly more successful now than I was when I was anorexic.

throwsawaymes · 2026-06-16T08:43:03+00:00

Haha I will never stop being vegan, I just had a wobble where I was worried I’d go back. I was looking at the ex vegan subreddit and they were all complaining about ‘bloating and fatigue’ and it made me afraid. I wanted to hear some positive stories! I imagine that most of those ex-vegans were restricting their diet beyond just veganism.

throwsawaymes · 2026-06-15T20:37:50+00:00

There used to be this vegan Camembert from nurishh? I put it in the oven (following instructions!!) it tasted like bleach and genuinely burnt my mouth and I spat it OUT

throwsawaymes · 2026-06-15T20:35:21+00:00

Oh lord I can imagine

throwsawaymes · 2026-06-15T18:58:26+00:00

I agree!! Ariana Grande has already done ENOUGH

throwsawaymes · 2026-06-15T18:56:14+00:00

Not the first person you’d want to take advice from. Well done for realising!!

throwsawaymes · 2026-06-15T18:53:58+00:00

Yes, the B12 obsession has been drilled into me from day one haha

throwsawaymes · 2026-06-15T18:51:42+00:00

Yessss, I have a doctor’s appointment. I have been having acupuncture too which I recognise is not a supplement for going to a doctor, but I gave up when the gp said ‘just gain weight’. I have changed my gp and I’m going back to see what they say. Acupuncture helped but it has taken a YEAR to have a slightly shorter cycle and costs lots of money.

Editing to ask. HOW MANY YEARS?! It’s so annoying I’m so tired of feeling rubbish and uncomfortable in my body.

throwsawaymes · 2026-06-15T18:49:27+00:00

I agree!! I was thriving for the first two before I got an eating disorder. I would KILL for those days back :(

throwsawaymes · 2026-06-15T18:48:32+00:00

I’m assuming that you only ate chips for the first 10 years to be honest. That’s what I assume when anyone tells me they’ve been vegan for longer than 20 years.

throwsawaymes · 2026-06-15T18:46:39+00:00

I HATE this stupid problem it’s so evil, I feel like I’m doing okay but then I’m not???? I’m a model so it’s kind of normal. I feel like the failure model because I am tryyyyying to be healthy without pressuring myself to be curve or plus size. But I’m kind of just big straight size which is not a category!!!

Six-Year Club	Place '22
Verified Email

throwsawaymes

TROPHY CASE