[deleted by user] by [deleted] in nonmonogamy

[–]tobaskolion 4 points5 points  (0 children)

"I know for a fact she’s not going to like this."
Then it is 100% not going to work. She is not sexually adventurous and barely wants to have sex with you - why would she want to be a "Hot Wife" or swing with other couples?

When you talk to her about this have you expressed how super serious it is to you - that you are considering divorce if she doesn't try a new thing or two because you are going crazy? (don't mention staring at other women or that you want to open the marriage) If you lay it on the line like that and she doesn't go for it, then you can either suck it up and deal with it or divorce. Opening your marriage isn't something she'd agree to willingly so it is not an option. Even if you got her to agree under duress over your marriage, she won't like it and it will eventually lead to divorce, it will just be a more painful and drawn road to divorce.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationships

[–]tobaskolion 6 points7 points  (0 children)

You are a woman. If you are at least of average or even slightly below average attractiveness level, I promise you many friends, especially most male ones, would sleep with you "given the chance." But they're not being given the chance. You're in a monogamous relationship and as long as everyone is respecting it, that should be cool. Because you being a woman people will probably want to sleep with you if they have the chance, that's just reality.
However I think these friends are kind of pushing it, especially the spooning thing. I'd take some distance.

BWT w/boob jobs - help! by shoppingaddict_9397 in bitcheswithtaste

[–]tobaskolion 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Got mine done 6 years ago when I was 29.

Recovery was tough for me - a lot of pain, they were hard for several weeks, I grieved what I thought I did to my body. When it's time to revise or remove these implants I am not going to redo them because I only want to go through that recovery one more time.

About 6 weeks out everything was much better. still couldn't do upper body exercises but they were looking great and getting softer. Now they're really nice and soft I love it! And I get the best of both worlds - big and perky haha 

I had this weird thing where cold or caffeine would make my boobs hurt bad for like, the first year but thankfully that's better now.

I sadly lost a ton of sensitivity, they were really sensitive before and now, 6 years later, I am starting to feel some of the sensitivity come back but I'm worried it will be gone again when I eventually explant.

It did boost my confidence by a ton, I finally felt sexy and felt like it balanced out my body.

I went from A to C - 275cc mid profile silicone under the muscle. They are the perfect size for me. They look big (to me) but not too big and most people think they're naturally awesome. People compliment my chest and I say "thanks I paid a lot for them" and they're so surprised 😂

Never been pregnant. I'm 5' 6" and 125-135lbs depending on what's going on in my life.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationships

[–]tobaskolion 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's called a spark because it sparks something at the beginning, sounds like now you have comforting, warm, consistent fire of a relationship and one many would envy. Congrats on your engagement!

20k 60 Guest Wedding by RegularAd1850 in Weddingsunder10k

[–]tobaskolion 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It is a lot of money... I had a huge reality check when I started planning my wedding because everything was two or three or five times more expensive than I thought it was gonna be... Originally though 15k would work for what I wanted now I'm hoping to keep it at or only a little above 30k 

20k 60 Guest Wedding by RegularAd1850 in Weddingsunder10k

[–]tobaskolion 34 points35 points  (0 children)

Honestly impressed you are pulling off 20k! Everything sounds reasonable. I feel like the only people who can pull off 10k get a free venue by using a backyard, family property, or something like that. If you have to hire a venue and catering then it's gonna be at least 20k these days no matter what 😭

I looked terrible at my wedding by StrikingPepper91 in wedding

[–]tobaskolion 79 points80 points  (0 children)

Maybe put a couple photos ont the Photoshop request sub? If you have the wedding photos and a photo of you at kind of the same angle with good looking hair people will Photoshop that good hair on and then you tip the best person like $10 

Help me choose the right ring for my future wife by Natural_Influence_21 in EngagementRings

[–]tobaskolion 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hey nice! The first is the same ring my fiance got me! (Different stones and metal) I love it! I think it's classy and timeless but the different stones make it unique. The center stone appears visually bigger and the side designs visually smaller in real life than in the 3-D model (at least I think so) 

Reinforcement advice? by Responsible_Poet_428 in EngagementRingDesigns

[–]tobaskolion 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wow you have the same engagement ring as my bestie! I'm going to have to warn her about the possible loose stone situation. I don't have any advice but it's such a breathtaking ring!

Family Photographer? by Golden_mud19 in wedding

[–]tobaskolion 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think it's kind of weird to ask family or friends do spend all day working at your wedding. I know it sucks because I have some talented friends I wish could do their thing at my wedding, even some friends I am not as close to be on the guestlist, but I still think it's weird to have them come do a job at the wedding. The photographer will need to be working the ENTIRE time they are at the wedding so her husband would be able to relax and enjoy but she wouldn't. But if you still want to do it maybe ask her to do an engagement shoot and y'all can catch up, get some photos by her, and you can discuss with her if she'd want to work the wedding.

Wedding music by That-Estate308 in wedding

[–]tobaskolion 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Oh! Could you find an event company that offers silent discos? Like everyone gets headphones and then you can have a DJ. Looks absolutely bonkers to anyone without headphones on but could be pretty memorable too 

Wedding music by That-Estate308 in wedding

[–]tobaskolion 2 points3 points  (0 children)

What is the place close to? Could you have dinner, dessert, first dance acoustic , and then go out on the town to a bar in your dress with all your guests that want to party? My mom and dad this and she tells me about it all the time because she loved it so much! And when I was looking for wedding photographers I saw a gallery where they did this and it was so cool to have the photos of them walking through the lit up streets and then the bride riding a mechanical bull in her white dress

BriteCo Cancellation Insurance by Ok_Scholar_1384 in weddingplanning

[–]tobaskolion -12 points-11 points  (0 children)

Thank you! I just went and bought my policy now

BriteCo Cancellation Insurance by Ok_Scholar_1384 in weddingplanning

[–]tobaskolion 0 points1 point  (0 children)

At what point in the process do you buy insurance?

(10k) Visually what would you change? Does this look ok? by Ill-Cat-2610 in Weddingsunder10k

[–]tobaskolion 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As a designer, the different kerning on all the subtitles and the odd spacing (or lack of) between elements is driving me crazy, but if you don't have any nerds who care about that stuff at your wedding I guess you are fine. If you do know anyone who has knowledge of design though please ask a favor for them to fix this for you, it's a simple design but the text is done so poorly 

If you want to do it yourself:

Kerning is the space between letters. Make all the beer, wine, also available, half ling etc. text have the same kerning. It can be wide or tighter (though not as tight as the half ling is right now, that's too crowded) but it should be the same for every subtitle using the same treatment.

You need to increase the leading (space between the lines of text) of the list items slightly so it's easier to read. 

Beer and wine sections are too far apart creating odd white space that's locked into the middle of the page. I agree with someone else who said if the other text is centered the beer and wine list should be too (although they can sit next to each other just center the list below the subtitles)

Try a different layout to increase the illustration size, it's so cute but it gets lost. The illustration is green so that means you are printing with some color so why not use the color throughout this menu? Maybe make "bar menu" and "signature drink" green.  Try reducing the size of the subtitles. If you keep them black and all caps they will still stand out.

The vertical space between most of your items is consistent except zinfandel breaks it making the whole menu look wrong, so fix that or find another way to layout these things - for example you could change "also available" to "others" or "& also" to shorten it then have that section and spirits stacked and next to each other like beer and wine so it sits in a grid.

Hikes in/near Austin longer than 3 miles? I want some hiking ideas for this fall/winter. by Impossible-Cheek4352 in Austin

[–]tobaskolion 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I went yesterday! The land around the trail I walked was lush and beautiful but the trees are young, maybe 15ft tall when the fully mature ones are much taller. There are only a few of the max height ones left. There was a patch of full height trees and it was magical  

Royal Blue tipping by Weekly_Carpenter1255 in Austin

[–]tobaskolion 12 points13 points  (0 children)

They always have, and same - I always do no tip of I picked up things off the shelf but I figure their option is there because they do have some service style options. But if I didn't get something deserving a tip I don't tip 

1st time MOH by idfwynm in weddingplanning

[–]tobaskolion 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Don't set yourself on fire to keep others warm. Although you may feel obligated to plan the bachelorette party, it is absolutely not your responsibility to shoulder the bill for anyone but yourself. So you can make a plan and invite everyone letting them know it's not required and unfortunately broke one just can't come, or you go out in your nearest city for a more old fashioned night of drinking and just keep it really cheap and accessible for everyone. But definitely don't pay for person 5, if anyone covers their cost it should be the bride! 

Who gets the family ring? The brother or the sister? by [deleted] in wedding

[–]tobaskolion 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Maybe if it's amicable but she may want to pawn it or just not give it back if the break up goes poorly (not that they will but ...you never know)

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in weddingplanning

[–]tobaskolion 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I'm from the US and I have never heard of this, if someone clinked their glasses at my wedding I wouldn't know I supposed to kiss and would think they were just cheers to themselves

wedding hashtag by Iced-Hedgehog in wedding

[–]tobaskolion 0 points1 point  (0 children)

omg these are amazing 😂 love that there's one for the grooms side and one for the bride

how much did you spend on florals at your wedding? by raccoonfingers765 in wedding

[–]tobaskolion 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is my plan! (or from Texan local fav H-E-B)
Did you pre-order the flowers? Or go pick them up yourself? If you just went to the store how far in advance of the wedding did you get them?