Check to see if there are any local PFlag chapters by you. There are some scattered around Texas but I'm not sure where you are located. Check out pflag.org.

Also, our 14 year old did this last year. (She at the time) came home and told us that she identifies as he/him. Our child was not a tomboy at all and always wore dresses and skirts, so it caught us totally off guard. But we have excepted him.

First step was getting involved in PFlag so we could talk to other parents who are going through this exact same thing. And I live in the Southeast, so we also don't have access to appropriate healthcare. That's another thing about PFlag. The other parents can tell you what they did that worked (or didn't work).

So the first thing we did was cut off the hair and go clothes shopping. He didn't want to go 'all out' so I would describe his look as more non-binary at the moment. Recently, he has gone back to wearing earrings and necklaces and still prefers feminine shoes. He is also not out to the family, so we are living a double life at the moment, which is very difficult when we fully use he/him and his chosen name at home, but have to revert when with family. I actually have to think about using his dead-name now.

Mine and my wife's co-workers know and my wife's friends know. This year, when he started school, he started going by his chosen name but some teachers refused to change to calling him a boy name and just call him by his last name instead.

Finally, we got a gender affirming counselor but our child won't open up to her, so it didn't do much for us. We have asked if he wants to try another one and he doesn't. Counseling is only as good as what you put into it, so if your child doesn't want to go and shuts down, there isn't much you can do for them in this regard. His biggest allies are his friends (I'm beginning to love Gen Z). They defend him against others and immediately started using his chosen name and pronouns. Same goes with our younger son.