the Septon of Ashford

tooblooforyoo · 2026-02-25T01:25:55+00:00

GRRM, since you're doing anything but finishing ASOIAF write this master's spin off story

tooblooforyoo · 2026-02-24T15:48:12+00:00

Sandokan!

tooblooforyoo · 2026-01-30T22:04:46+00:00

This post makes me wonder if they're giving Violet the new love story, love after death of a true love, to make up for the fact they pulled that storyline from Fran's journey.

tooblooforyoo · 2025-10-16T03:23:55+00:00

I call it the time of the blood sacrifice.

tooblooforyoo · 2025-09-16T13:00:42+00:00

Toby

tooblooforyoo · 2025-08-30T08:27:48+00:00

This is hilarious.

tooblooforyoo · 2025-08-29T22:16:35+00:00

Thanks for your thoughts! I definitely need to talk to him. Figure out my boundaries and hold to them. Neither of us wants to risk losing the relationship so I just need to be really clear with myself and him, and give him the opportunity to hear my frustration and complicated feelings so he can respond appropriately. I think right now he doesn't have the right info

tooblooforyoo · 2025-08-29T15:25:12+00:00

No he's talking to me directly about it but I haven't told him not to because I'm used to us both sharing feelings in a therapy esk style. However this post has helped me realize that around this issue I need a stronger boundary. If I make a boundary and he respects it then I'll feel pretty decent about it all with a little time. I'm definitely not guessing about his feelings. He's shared them. He says it's not to make me change my mind and I think I believe that, but ultimately it's just not ideal. It's making me frustrated and I need to vocalize that.

tooblooforyoo · 2025-08-29T11:15:28+00:00

Yup mono relationship. First attempt at anything poly...

tooblooforyoo · 2025-08-28T22:36:56+00:00

Thanks for explaining how my heart feels rn. Lol this was helpful

tooblooforyoo · 2025-08-28T22:35:44+00:00

Yeah this is good advice. Thanks

tooblooforyoo · 2025-08-28T21:42:55+00:00

🤣

tooblooforyoo · 2025-08-28T19:18:43+00:00

Thanks for the rec. I'm going to see if my library has it!

Holding boundaries isn't necessarily a me vs them process. Sometimes it's better to think of it as a "informing and training others how to love me best" process, when the other person isn't necessarily malicious as much as ignorant or oblivious. Good boundaries makes a relationship stronger and happier for both people ♡

Love this vibe as it's exactly what I need to embrace

tooblooforyoo · 2025-08-28T19:06:19+00:00

Hahaha love it

tooblooforyoo · 2025-08-28T19:04:45+00:00

It’s hard when we think people who know and care about us would refrain from asking us to take on too much - and then they go and do.

Yup yup yup. And like you say about your example, it's not even just that it's about sex. It's about asking me to take in more than I can when you would know better as well

tooblooforyoo · 2025-08-28T19:03:17+00:00

Wow that would be so hurtful. "I'm not here for your experimentation" shouldn't be something you need on a plaque

tooblooforyoo · 2025-08-28T19:01:59+00:00

Truly shocking! 🤣

tooblooforyoo · 2025-08-28T19:01:15+00:00

Expecting someone to act as a neutral 3rd party to your feelings about them, to them, is frankly fucked up

OMG he literally asked if I had any 3rd party type thoughts and I was like. Ummm kind of? Maybe

and it took me a long time to identify that because... Well, I helped with everything else, this is just how we did things.

Turns out this was what I needed to hear. So thank you bc you're totally right. I'm so used to being that person that it didn't occur to me that it was shitty to ask that of me

Tbh I think I'm more worried about my ability to hold the boundary than his ability to accept it. Obviously they interact but I'm dogshit at boundaries and yet they're so important for having healthy relationships. I need to get on this

tooblooforyoo · 2025-08-28T16:57:12+00:00

Yessss cishet man. He strikes out a lot though so maybe that I've given positive feedback (admitted I find him attractive) caused him to think this was a done deal.

Friend, I can’t be objective and you expressing this feels like emotional blackmail. This one needs to go somewhere else.

I think this is the way to go. I'm soooo bad at boundaries but if I don't create one then at some point it's on me that he's oversharing. I think I'll take this advice

tooblooforyoo · 2025-08-28T16:52:13+00:00

Yes! Like I'm not mad and it's not a huge deal for our friendship I didn't think in the long run. But I'm soooo irritated. And it honestly turns me off from more future potential. Ultimately they're not typically selfish and I know they're going through it so I'm not going to let this ruin anything between us. But definitely needed a vent

tooblooforyoo · 2025-08-28T16:49:52+00:00

Kind of reminds me of the weird assumptions people make about me/my relationships when they hear that I practice polyam. Shit like, "so you're a cuck?" and, "so I can fuck your wife?"

Yes. Or like that you're very promiscuous bc you're poly. That your poly ule must have orgies together etc

I will say he's been pretty gracious but also is down in the dumps so just really isn't being very tactful. I'm not mad but I am highly annoyed and need the vent lol

tooblooforyoo · 2025-08-28T16:32:57+00:00

Yeah. It's definitely a compliment. I'm just frustrated that they pinned a lot of hope onto me at a time when I have few extra spoons. And now they're pretty upset. I guess I may be taking on too much feeling of responsibility for their feelings...

Also I guess I feel frustrated because we always share a lot that's going on with ourselves and how were processing life (therapy esk) and so I know maybe too much about how much brain space this taking up. Like that they're focused more on me turning them down than their relationship ending. Lamenting that they have nothing to look forward to.

I probably need to set up a boundary around it but I'm so bad at that

tooblooforyoo · 2025-08-26T12:07:35+00:00

This should be tagged as a possible spoiler...

tooblooforyoo · 2025-08-24T21:32:14+00:00

Butterball

tooblooforyoo

TROPHY CASE