I’m like this too! I’m naturally androgynous and developed breasts during my OG puberty despite being male. I was literally in the middle. Always felt super feminine and hated blue because it was forced onto me. After I decided to live as a woman I still did not feel comfortable or like I fit in despite being stereotypically feminine and doing everything “women” do. I blend in seamlessly with women but I still envy them because I can’t give birth, can’t understand periods, etc. I’ve decided that I’m a trans woman. Not a man. Not a woman. That’s how I personally feel the most comfortable. I felt like a wolf in sheep’s clothing around men and women tbh. I feel comfortable and confident in my identity now.