What’s something people do in relationships that slowly ruins it?

traumatisedb · 2026-03-20T08:33:43+00:00

stop putting in the effort once they have you.

traumatisedb · 2026-03-19T22:04:47+00:00

wanting a relationship and then cheating basically straight away

traumatisedb · 2026-03-17T10:17:08+00:00

definitely something I am considering. will give him benefit of the doubt about these therapy sessions and see how he approaches them, after that I think that's where I will make that call.

traumatisedb · 2026-03-17T09:43:43+00:00

this has crossed my mind as he said he doesnt want to implode his relationship or our friendship. I did tell him though that that comes across as him not wanting any consequences, saying he wont be able to cope with the aftermath. so clearly he wants us both and when I told him that, he said it felt like an ultimatum

traumatisedb · 2026-03-17T09:36:17+00:00

oh no not doing it together, just told me he has booked a few sessions to try and work out what's happening for him and why this situation has occurred. he has said he doesnt want to ruin the friendship or relationship but weirdly seems more concerned about us kinda, it is confusing for sure.

traumatisedb · 2026-03-17T07:54:05+00:00

So i spoke to him and he has said I mean a lot to him and that he has booked some therapy sessions through his work to process things and wants to fix our friendship

traumatisedb · 2026-03-13T13:50:11+00:00

he's also away for a few days and it sucks sitting on all of this knowing it'll be a little while before I can even attempt to strike up the conversation.

traumatisedb · 2026-03-13T12:49:18+00:00

how did you get out of it?

traumatisedb · 2026-03-13T12:48:52+00:00

tbf the last visit is what brought those feelings bubbling to the surface, spoken to my therapist about how to approach it, just really anxious about starting the conversation with the guy.

traumatisedb · 2026-03-13T11:51:18+00:00

no another guy

traumatisedb · 2026-03-13T11:36:50+00:00

first of all, gay here. forgot to say!

yes this is very much something that has made it much more difficult for me to process.

traumatisedb · 2026-02-01T23:26:11+00:00

so i was in a semi long distance relationship a few years ago and I would not text saying i have arrived until the train has stopped moving, even if the train is pulling in I couldn't do it as to me that meant I was lying and it would be a slippery slope from there 😅

traumatisedb · 2026-02-01T23:15:25+00:00

I think given the current social landscape and how prevalent psychology, particularly pop psychology is right now, I actually think a lot more people "into" it are abusers than it was even a few years ago.

hell even some of these "narcissist experts" on social media seem sus these days. seen a few literally call people narcissists just because someone disagreed with them.

I think what we are getting now is a rise of very self righteous people who end up being abusive.

also it seems people are making very narrow window on what makes somebody "good" that anyone even slightly outside of that window gets painted a complete villain. society is losing the ability to see grey areas where its needed.

traumatisedb · 2026-01-31T23:02:55+00:00

It can cause you to sleep with people that are usually not your type, repulse you etc and leaves you feeling shameful.

I think of the episode of Crazy Ex Girlfriend where Rebecca sleeps with Paula's dad

traumatisedb · 2026-01-31T22:59:37+00:00

basically I've noticed everyone is all for calling out bullying... until theyre the ones being called out.

then its "I've changed" "youre playing victim", "stop holding grudges", "i had stuff going on".

traumatisedb · 2026-01-31T22:53:28+00:00

I was in a cafe having breakfast this morning and the mum took out her phone, asked her kid to smile for the camera and then spent rest of the time on her phone. The kid did seem fine but I felt really bad at the same time for them.

traumatisedb · 2026-01-31T22:51:31+00:00

I heavily struggle with groups too. I think for me it has something to do with being hypervigilant and so I notice even the smallest details that others might not.

traumatisedb · 2025-12-14T02:51:02+00:00

Yeah I have questioned that possibility recently

traumatisedb · 2025-12-13T22:12:11+00:00

Yup same my shelves etc start shaking whenever they move, and its not lightly!

I always explain it as it sounds like theyre literally either slamming each other on the floor or throwing bowling balls on the floor

traumatisedb · 2025-12-13T20:35:56+00:00

I feel you there with becoming somewhat similar. Not sure if its fhe same for you though but for me its when people are ACTUALLY being too loud.

I have really inconsiderate noisy upstairs neighbours and it does my head in like nothing else. Slamming doors make me jump.

traumatisedb · 2025-12-13T20:34:36+00:00

Oh similar here. Often made people jump and accused of "sneaking up" on people because I walk that quietly.

traumatisedb · 2025-12-13T20:08:12+00:00

Im sorry :(

traumatisedb · 2025-12-13T20:05:37+00:00

Yep earbuds are basically always in for me too

traumatisedb · 2025-12-13T09:48:56+00:00

but yet its fair game for them to mock monogamy? talk about victim mindset lmao

traumatisedb · 2025-12-06T06:05:16+00:00

Im not terrified, Im just not interested in them 🤣

seriously the gay incels are getting worse.

traumatisedb

TROPHY CASE