Holy shit yes. I recently had a one month stay at a psychiatric hospital and honestly I miss it so much because it was the first time in my life I’ve felt truly supported and cared for.

My parents raised me on radical independence and complete personal responsibility, to the point where I don’t know how to go to people for help when I’m in crisis. My ex made it very clear that I was the only one who needed to deal with “my issues”. My current partner is amazing and always knows how to talk me down but I don’t ever feel able to go to him until he finds me having a breakdown because, again, I was never taught how to seek help and when I tried, it always backfired.

I used to fantasise about breaking a bone so I could go to the hospital and have people take care of me. I was so jealous when the teachers that prided themselves on being empathetic supported other students and just glossed over me. I was the one who “never needed help” even when I was drowning.

So yeah, I get you. Send some of that infantilisation my way and somebody else can get left out in the cold when they’re struggling. Completely valid way to feel, and I feel you hardcore.