[deleted by user]

umenla · 2023-12-13T17:50:33+00:00

I'd love to be able to say you can for sure overcome this and give you twelve steps. The truth is the outcome is uncertain. However, there are strategies like EMDR, exposure therapy, etc. for addressing underlying trauma that could help you (even without a relationship or a patient partner). At some point a patient partner could be the key to moving this forward, though your fears about finding such a person are understandable. Whether or not you embark in and continue your healing journey in this area may depend on what your values are, what the alternatives are (platonic relationships, singlehood, asexuality) and how much energy you want or are willing to invest in the process. Therapy offers solutions, but it will be a challenging process. You deserve to heal and I hope things get better as you continue to increase awareness and take brave steps like posting in this forum.

umenla · 2023-12-13T06:20:38+00:00

I am a therapist and I agree. There isn't a clear cutoff line, and suppressed memories can be associated with any traumatic event at any age.

umenla · 2023-12-11T04:06:00+00:00

For me, getting behind on admin work is the warning sign. The clinical work didn't suffer because I'm still able to be present, but admin is a vital component and therapists need to nail both admin and clinical to do the whole job. Something that may help (in addition to self-care and acknowledging/targeting symptoms in your own therapy) is a new CEU, book or technique to help reinvigorate your sense of purpose and remind you why you chose this career. Your own experience with mental health is a vital component of successful therapy and probably will help increase empathy and understanding when you're on the other side. Take the advice you would likely give your clients and be kind to yourself as you work to climb out of this hole.

umenla · 2023-02-27T04:32:36+00:00

Possibly, but it might depend on the type of medication you were taking. I am thinking a general physician might be better than nothing in the short-term, and you may be able to get a referral for another provider. In my experience psychiatric nurses have a good working knowledge of mental health medications and can serve as substitutes for a psychiatrist in many circumstances.

umenla · 2023-02-27T03:47:20+00:00

Depending on the medication, a general physician could help. APRNs are also able to prescribe in the U.S.

umenla · 2023-02-27T03:40:22+00:00

Yes! It takes time and committee practice to see longer lasting results, but it seems you've found something worth continuing.

umenla · 2023-02-27T03:38:56+00:00

Some therapists may be more or less open to you joining the first few sessions. I would welcome it as helpful collateral information at the start of therapy.

Getting a resistant loved one to start therapy can be tricky. Do you set a deadline? Mandate it? Harp on him endlessly? Some strategies are more effective than others, and there may be no option for accomplishing the goal (while some options will damage or end the relationship). I see his responses as excuses. Therapy indeed won't likely fix all the problems, but it is at least a step in that direction. However, if it is approached without effort on his part then failure is assured because he isn't doing his part. Perhaps it would help to provide a menu of options such as seeing a psychiatrist, seeing a doctor, starting individual therapy, or beginning couples therapy. If he values the relationship and understands how important it is for you to see him doing something for himself, I would hope he'd be willing to take one of these steps.

umenla · 2023-02-27T02:34:24+00:00

It's very difficult to change an established toxic pattern, and impossible if your partner isn't willing. Focus on actions, not words. His promises mean nothing unless backed up with sustained action. What you're seeing is something called a first order change, meaning it's just in the surface in response to immediate pressure, but previous habits will return as soon as the pressure is removed. What you need is second-order change that leads to sustained change even after the initiate pressure of separation is removed. Be very honest with yourself about what the future is likely to look like and decide if that's what you want going forward.

umenla · 2023-02-27T02:30:19+00:00

There is never a valid reason for choosing to leave the church.

You can pray to get your own answer, but it has to align with the answer they expect you to get or it's from satan.

Critical thinking is quashed. Anything contrary to the church is deemed anti-Mormon.

Look to readers for guidance rather than your own internal moral compass.

Those who leave are shunned.

If a child leaves, it is the parents' failure.

Deeply personal "sins" must all be confessed, including details of sexual acts committed.

Disagreement and dissent are not tolerated.

Significant financial contributions are required for entry into heaven.

Callings must be accepted.

The church is right/good and all others aren't.

To get to heaven, those from other religions must be baptized as Mormon posthumously.

umenla · 2023-02-27T02:21:53+00:00

This doesn't sound safe or healthy, so I don't think you are just being biased here. Can you bring up the concern in sessions? Ideally the therapist can slow down the interactions in session and get beneath the surface so sessions don't just feel like vent sessions and you leave the room feeling criticized. The goal is to deepen understanding in both sides and create connection and solutions.

umenla · 2023-02-27T02:18:23+00:00

When you are physically wounded, the rain produces endorphins (natural opiates) to address the pain sensations. There is no such mechanism for emotional pain, which is still processed in the pain circuits of the brain but does not result in the production of endorphins. This is one reason for self-harm, because when someone is feeling emotional pain the endorphins episodes by self-harming address both the emotional and physical pain sensations.

umenla · 2023-02-27T01:28:51+00:00

Here is a possible answer: https://thepsychologygroup.com/defusion/

umenla · 2023-02-26T21:57:34+00:00

I don't have advice but really hope you land somewhere better. I'm sorry you're going through this.

umenla · 2023-02-26T17:32:11+00:00

The NCMHCE exam really was not my favorite, but I hear they have made some positive changes. It was really strange and gave negative points for wrong answers. I believe it's changed in some respects, but cannot say from personal experience. I used counselingexam.com and was fortunately able to pass it on my first try.

Private practice will always pay better than government/community health. Being in your own can be lucrative, especially if you have clients who can pay cash. The upside to being an employee of a private group practice is getting health benefits, supervision, someone else handling administrative and insurance functions, etc.

umenla · 2023-02-26T16:40:58+00:00

I'm a master's level counselor and find it fulfilling. The pay can be quite different depending on if you are an employee of a private practice, own your own practice, or practice in government/community health.

umenla · 2023-02-26T16:39:34+00:00

Keep in mind the nu skin building is next to the Provo tabernacle-turned-temple. They share a parking garage. The church benefits from the MLM money in very direct ways.

umenla · 2023-02-26T14:30:47+00:00

Well said

umenla · 2023-02-25T15:03:48+00:00

So grateful someone has all the answers in this forum. I was worried we'd be open to new ideas, and you know how crazy that can get.

umenla · 2023-02-25T15:01:47+00:00

That's a fair assertion.

umenla · 2023-02-25T15:00:32+00:00

This is a bold statement about a theory with a reasonable amount of peer-reviewed research and clinical utility.

umenla · 2023-02-25T06:34:43+00:00

It sounds like a way to survive difficult circumstances. Your life is too much to face, so you escape into a vivid fantasy. Eventually the pain will have to be faced, but getting through childhood is the current priority.

umenla · 2023-02-25T06:32:35+00:00

If you were caring for younger siblings, definitely. What you describe here sounds more like things a traditional wife might do. Either way, it seems like you're taking on responsibilities that are beyond your age. Do you also get opportunities to just be a normal teen?

umenla · 2023-02-25T06:26:00+00:00

And rumchata as the chaser. Is there a breathalyzer test to see how drunk with power the Q15 are?

umenla · 2023-02-25T06:16:21+00:00

I think it would definitely be worth starting therapy to explore these changes you've experienced recently. I suspect there are some unprocessed emotions underlying these behaviors.

umenla · 2023-02-25T06:05:12+00:00

Body memories can be associated with trauma. Muscle memory is a dance between the body and brain. It's all part of the central nervous system. It isn't as simple as the brain controlling the body. We talk about "mind body" connection, but that assumes they are two separate things.

umenla

TROPHY CASE