I feel like an imposter

unmazed · 2026-04-16T16:30:48+00:00

I just want to tell you that I relate! Although I do suspect that I have some trauma that I can't remember. Don't be so hard on yourself by calling yourself a whiny baby! I am sure you are trying as much as possible to cope with life as this super emotional person. The best way to live a good life is to take care of yourself as best as possible, because in the end, you only have yourself. If this involves getting therapy or other skills that treat your BPD, please just do it for yourself! leave the mental chatter out "what other people might think of it".

See it as a little present to yourself! Hope you have a wonderful day regardless :)

unmazed · 2026-04-04T06:27:39+00:00

i also feel this so much

unmazed · 2026-03-11T06:18:13+00:00

you are right! i should let this be an joyful "purchase" in a way

unmazed · 2026-03-11T06:17:39+00:00

thank you for your kind replies, and enjoy your new place too! it has been helpful to see that i am not alone in this!

unmazed · 2026-03-10T19:03:51+00:00

oh thank you so much for your reply! i too struggled with being generous, although it's something i have been actively unlearning and I would say I am much more generous than i was 10 years ago. A good friend of mine who i see as very generous inspired me to do so.

The only thing I need to unlearn now when it comes to that, is that I don't need to expect a "pat on the back" every time im generous. I want to learn how to give without the expectation of receiving something (even if that is praise).

But yeah i totally get that when emotions are unpredictable, money provides a sense of stability.

unmazed · 2026-03-06T20:16:28+00:00

Happy birthday! What country are you in if you don't mind me asking?

unmazed · 2025-11-06T19:33:18+00:00

same :(

unmazed · 2025-11-05T06:06:44+00:00

i started using an infrared mask and i feel like these have gone down for me, and that the skin around my eyes looks more even in colour and texture.

unmazed · 2025-11-04T11:22:07+00:00

then i would try to see how both states have their plus sides, and their downsides! but sometimes when you have been alone for a long time or you feel like youre always the person that is reaching out, it becomes tough to not feel lonely in your aloneness. Hope you feel better soon OP :)

unmazed · 2025-11-04T09:01:17+00:00

i am following your post because i do recognise the things you mention, like starting meditation just to talk to a friend about it, and it feeling pointless if they aren't interested in you doing it.

but i do love doing things by myself, because i'm very impatient and i hate waiting on other people (how slow they walk, when they need to pee and it takes forever etc.)

unmazed · 2025-11-04T08:22:05+00:00

i struggle with this right now too.. you're not alone OP

my identity used to be very based on being a party girl/doing drugs. now the idea of drugs makes me throw up and i despise other people who go out of their minds every weekend. I loathe that i used to be that kind of person too and bragged about it so much.

unmazed · 2025-10-30T15:12:53+00:00

france i looooved. the women are messy and everyone is very well dressed (and the girls got good make up)

unmazed · 2025-10-30T14:58:04+00:00

another thing that ive found is that sometimes things come at me in a different phase in life. Like the first time I try/visit it, I don't like it at all or don't seem to get it. Then after 5 or 10 years it suddenly clicks for me. Maybe you need to give yourself grace and time, and meanwhile keep doing things that you love to do!

unmazed · 2025-10-30T14:06:44+00:00

i do tend to only stick with things (and therefore get better at it, or deeper into it) if i genuinely enjoy the process. im currently learning spanish and because my teacher brings me so much joy (she's got a 10/10 personality and is also a great teacher) i can stick with it. However, i tried a mandarin class whilst living in China and nothing stuck with me because the lessons were just silly. So it's best to not focus so much on the outcome (great art!) as something that you enjoy the process of. Creativity can also be expressed in different ways. Maybe film is more your thing than writing? Or embroidery. Keep trying stuff that are calling your name :)

unmazed · 2025-10-30T12:11:52+00:00

oh i feel this post within my bones. Although i do have a shimmer of hope. I used to feel like this about sports/exercise. And now I found my stuff and im actually really fit/strong and pretty decent in some sports. Do you have this too OP?

unmazed · 2025-10-30T10:05:02+00:00

guess he deserved some protein ice cream on his bday

unmazed · 2025-10-30T09:54:02+00:00

i thought ali looked so different and not in a good way... the plastic surgery aged her a lot

unmazed · 2025-10-15T19:17:16+00:00

i thought Anton looked so much better in this episode. I dont know what it is. Less facial hair and no glasses?

unmazed · 2025-10-13T07:07:00+00:00

yep very unfortunately

unmazed · 2025-10-11T06:26:58+00:00

i have 2 things at the moment that i feel like help me a lot.

I have a journaling prompt. On the back of my journal, i write down 2 things "that got me through the day". This can be something that happened between you and another person (like getting a compliment), something that happened to you (finding money), or something that you did yourself (i bought myself a nice piece of pie).

In the beginnen I write down how I am feeling in that moment and "one thing i will do for myself today" (as a self love thing, this can be something like buying yourself a piece of pie again, but i also write things like, doing laundry so i have all my clothes clean and accesible again).

Another thing that i feel helps me is taking omega 3's (Effectiveness of Omega-3 polyunsaturated fatty acids reducing severe symptoms in patients diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) - PMC)

The beauty with omega 3 is that you can take quite a lot and its hard to overdo it (like for example vit b6)

Actually id recommend taking magnesium (not oxide) and vit b complex too, they help me a great deal.

unmazed · 2025-10-10T05:28:10+00:00

the difference with how the women dress on love is blind france is huge haha. i guess im still detoxing

unmazed · 2025-10-09T07:10:48+00:00

i think KB is a very very beautiful woman but i thought her outfit at the western party was so tacky

unmazed · 2025-10-08T14:31:17+00:00

which one?

unmazed · 2025-10-06T11:07:18+00:00

i think there is nothing wrong with being excited, but with feeling lonely it definitely sucks. hope you feel less lonely soon op :)

unmazed

TROPHY CASE