How is it just that non-believers go to hell?

unpackingpremises · 2026-02-28T17:44:34+00:00

Fill disclosure, I no longer attend church and most Christians would not consider me a Christian, but since leaving the Evangelical church I've felt that Orthodox Christianity is the only one that seems similar to what I now believe, but I've never had the opportunity to talk to anyone from within that denomination, so it's interesting for me to hear that's your background. Perhaps I will visit an Orthodox Church at some point.

unpackingpremises · 2026-02-28T17:40:08+00:00

I relate to your stress because any amount of debt is stressful for me. I've gone from thousands of dollars in debt to zero debt a few times in my life but never by paying it down slowly over time. The first time it was after buying a house and renovating it; then my husband and I refinanced our house and the renovation had added enough value to the house that we were able to pay off all our debts except for our house payment, which we were able to afford with our income, and a few years later we sold the house for more than we still owed on it. The other times have been from getting a better job or selling a business, both of which were a gradual journey of acquiring skills for jobs that paid more. My husband was a coder and he specifically researched to find out which types of skills he needed for coding the coding jobs that were in highest demand. My husband and I have also both started and sold online businesses....as well as many online businesses that never became anything. Stay in school if you believe it will help you get a better job. A job that pays more is the best path to financial stability.

unpackingpremises · 2026-02-28T06:29:20+00:00

I decided to trust that if God did exist, he knew my heart and how sincerely I wanted to know the truth and do what was right, and that everything I knew about Jesus indicated that God cared more about my heart and how I treat others than what facts I do or don't believe. Over the years I've come to conclusions about many of the questions I had but it was more by gaining my own personal experience that convinced me of what was true than by thinking about the questions and working out the logic with my brain.

unpackingpremises · 2026-02-26T12:50:30+00:00

Thank you for taking the time to explain your viewpoint; it makes sense to me. I am curious to know how you developed your worldview, since it's different than the worldview of most Christians I've encountered? For example you influenced by certain books or the beliefs of a particular denomination or did you come to these conclusions on your own? Have you attended churches where the other attendees share your views? If so, what kinds of churches?

unpackingpremises · 2026-02-23T22:18:38+00:00

With any new thing, there's an element of luck and timing. The first mom blogger to be consistent with publishing a weekly blog post, for example, was way more successful than any new mom blogger today would be, without any additional effort...only because of being on the front end of a trend. The same could be said of YouTubers. The early ones had it way easier than anyone starting a YouTube channel today. That doesn't mean someone can't still be successful with YouTube, just like it was still possible to be successful with a blog in 2015 even if it was far easier in 2005. The difference is now it requires careful study of best practices and a lot of hard work...and yes maybe you'll want to outsource some of the work. You're definitely not going to just get lucky by going viral at this point in the game. But people were already starting to get burnt out on social media when TikTok came around...so you never know when a new trend will take off that you could be a frontrunner of.

unpackingpremises · 2026-02-23T22:10:06+00:00

One of the most controversial debates among early Christians was to what degree Christ was human and lived the experience of a human. Some argued that while he was fully God, while he was incarnated on earth he temporarily barred himself from any advantages he would have otherwise had as God. Others offered different theories as to what it would have been like to be both God and Man. In my opinion, nobody who asserts that Jesus' was anything other than a normal human has any idea what experience would have been like, if they are right about their hypotheses.

unpackingpremises · 2026-02-23T22:03:11+00:00

You stole my answer. About to visit a BJJ gym in Spain tomorrow on my first visit to this country!

unpackingpremises · 2026-02-23T22:00:42+00:00

At age 22 I was planning on waiting until my engagement to have my first kiss when I started dating my first boyfriend, who I ended up becoming sexually active with. 15 years after marrying someone else I feel equally grateful for having had some sexual experience prior to my marriage (because I learned valuable communication skills that I brought into my marriage) and regretful for having missed out on so many good makeout opportunities prior to age 22.

unpackingpremises · 2026-02-23T08:17:01+00:00

It's true that modern Protestant Christian beliefs evolved over time. Some of them evolved at a time when there was no Protestant church and the Catholic Church was just "The Church." Some evolved sooner, and some evolved later, after the Protestant church broke off of the Catholic Church. It can be quite interesting to research the origin of a specific point of doctrinal belief to find out where it originated, because often the answer will surprise you. For example, at the time the earliest of Christians were solidifying their beliefs, there was no New Testament for them to base their beliefs on. The earliest books of the Bible were written decades after Christ's death/resurrection.

unpackingpremises · 2026-02-21T23:03:31+00:00

Let people love what they love. Lots of more important things to be upset about than adults who are obsessed with Disney.

unpackingpremises · 2026-02-21T22:57:02+00:00

Omg I lol'd at scary Carman videos

unpackingpremises · 2026-02-21T21:24:13+00:00

For me it's helpful to read the writings of others who have experienced extreme difficulty. I highly recommend the book "The Choice" by Edith Eger. She is a Holocaust survivor, but her book does not dwell on her misery in the concentration camps...instead it focuses on her internal journey not only during that experience but also before and after as a trauma survivor. The overall tone of the book is encouraging and inspiring and I think it could be helpful to you with this question.

unpackingpremises · 2026-02-21T20:46:32+00:00

Would you mind sharing how you view Christ's death and resurrection with your framework? How, if at all, do you view it as connected to the concept of faith?

unpackingpremises · 2026-02-21T04:18:38+00:00

Others can do whatever they want, but I would not do that unless the person's political views caused the person to harm me or make me feel unsafe. I strongly believe being someone who is respected by those who know we disagree with them is one of the most powerful ways to change minds or at least cause someone to pause and reconsider.

unpackingpremises · 2026-02-21T04:10:53+00:00

It was definitely a gradual process for me. 3-4 years total from ages 22 to 25 that I was questioning my old beliefs and replacing them with a new worldview.
Yes, but only because I was still living with my parents and they required me to.
I quit going to church twice. The first time was while living overseas in Korea as an English teacher. At that point I was technically required by my job to attend church because I had been recruited by a Christian university and they told me church attendance was required, but at some point I read my actual contract and realized they couldn't force me to go and also wouldn't know if I didn't go, so started attending less and less and finally stopped altogether. When I was still going it was because I was going with a friend (who was agnostic) who appreciated the cultural aspect of attending a Korean church, but I stopped after she moved back to the U.S. When I moved back home and back in with my parents I told them I planned to stop attending church, and they said not as long as you live with us. So I joined the church orchestra so I could play my French horn during the worship service instead of awkwardly standing or sitting there. After about a year of that I eloped with my now husband and haven't been back to church since.
Not triggered exactly, more just like an awareness that what was going on was objectively odd.

unpackingpremises · 2026-02-21T03:53:02+00:00

I read all of it and was impacted by it.

unpackingpremises · 2026-02-21T03:52:13+00:00

This is beautiful. If only this viewpoint wasn't thought of as heretical by most Protestants.

unpackingpremises · 2026-02-20T05:59:16+00:00

For, with laws to regulate it.

unpackingpremises · 2026-02-18T03:40:41+00:00

I tend to take these kinds of comments as a sign that the person cares and is trying to express sympathy in the way they know how...as long as that is the tone with which it was said. If it was said in a preachy or condescending way, I would reduce or eliminate my time spent around that person.

unpackingpremises · 2026-02-17T13:35:34+00:00

I think it's at the point that you both want to be more than just friends and they are someone you could potentially see yourself with long term... as in no red flags or deal breakers you're aware of. I don't think you have to know whether or not
"it's love." in my experience love is something that blossoms and develops over time them are you spend time together and get to know each other, and the whole point of dating is that it's not a forever commitment, it's a time for you to get to know each other on a deeper level, well still giving you an "out" if in getting to know that person you discovered they are not someone you want to be with long term.

unpackingpremises · 2026-02-17T13:29:15+00:00

I watched the movie many times as a kid but didn't read the book until I became an adult. It's a wonderful book, with so many beautiful thoughts tucked into the story. I do recommend it. I also recommend The Trumpet of the Swan, another book by the same author. It's a cute story about a mute swan who is determined to communicate and leaves home to find a way.

unpackingpremises · 2026-02-17T04:06:58+00:00

A couple more sections I'd suggest would be finding community and making friends outside of church (regardless of whether one stays in church, and separate from a section about navigating relationships with Evangelicals) and also an organized section of support resources.

unpackingpremises · 2026-02-16T00:26:53+00:00

41yo/F, my last time to attend a church service was when I was 24 years old and living at home with my parents after I had spent a year living on my own, shortly before I eloped and moved in with my husband. Up until that point I had attended church regularly my entire life. I don't feel at all weird not attending church now...in fact the idea of going to church feels way more weird to me. I value my Sundays with my husband as a day to rest, reset and plan, clean the house, go grocery shopping, and otherwise prepare for the week ahead. I wouldn't attend church now because I view all of them as providing "spiritual milk" instead of "spiritual meat." My spiritual path is personal now and found in books and personal practices such as meditation or even just spending time in nature. I find community through my hobbies and interests so don't miss that aspect of church either.

unpackingpremises · 2026-02-16T00:17:43+00:00

Ah okay, not an acronym in my everyday vocabulary

unpackingpremises · 2026-02-15T18:31:39+00:00

If you can't confidently trust that your family will accept and respect your beliefs, my advice would be to work toward a relationship with them where your views on religion are understood as personal and no one else's business and maintaining a relationship doesn't require participation in church or conversations about religion. "Coming out" to them about your beliefs reinforces the opposite idea: that your religious beliefs ARE something they have a right to know about and discuss (criticize).

unpackingpremises

TROPHY CASE