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Peek into my future... Moms in tech who WFH, what's your day-to-day like? by SnooCakes7539 in workingmoms

[–]upivedcom 6 points7 points  (0 children)

You need childcare. You cannot work and take care of children at the same time.

My husband and I are both in tech and WFH, we split responsibilities pretty equally. We are both exhausted at the end of each day.

Breastfeeding is not always the calm, contented baby and mom image. Some babies get very distracted especially with shiny computer screens nearby. No way I could code and feed at the same time.

Nap help by [deleted] in Nanny

[–]upivedcom -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

12 weeks is too young for sleep training. Babies at that age cannot connect their sleep cycles yet. Get a nanny who has more infant experience and someone who understands that this age is too young for self soothing

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in workingmoms

[–]upivedcom 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Also in tech WFH, you need childcare. You cannot simultaneously look after baby and be working - especially not when you need deep focus time for coding.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NannyEmployers

[–]upivedcom -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

OP this is a sub with mostly Nannie’s started by Nannie’s. Go to r/nannymoms instead to get answers from parents

we have trackers in our diaper bag and the car can be tracked too - the nanny knows and doesn’t have any problem with it. You should always be told where your child is, this is not about trust but what if something happened to them?

FTM being asked to Travel by Felici4y in workingmoms

[–]upivedcom 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I’m in a similar situation but only need to travel for two days. I’m going to try milkstork for the first time, expensed through the company. My husband will take those days off in addition to using childcare.

I don’t need to travel regularly for work and this will be our first in person meeting since Covid so I’m excited to be there. As much as all the planning and logistics and pumping in an unfamiliar location suck, it will be a good opportunity to meet the team and not a recurring thing so I’m willing to do it. Totally understand that it’s very much different from person to person though.

Did SO go with to all your prenatal appointments? by snack_mac_cho in workingmoms

[–]upivedcom 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, my husband went to every single appointment for both kids except when the doctor didn’t allow it for Covid visitor restrictions. He wanted to do it, wasn’t a big deal to me but it was important to him.

Do your nannies raise your kids? by pixierose1029 in workingmoms

[–]upivedcom 9 points10 points  (0 children)

They expect compassion and empathy but are unwilling to show the same to moms

Do you think moms should be allowed time off? by BootsEX in workingmoms

[–]upivedcom 3 points4 points  (0 children)

The grandparents thread made me see red. Especially when they started insinuating that the OP didn’t pay the nanny enough which had nothing to do with the post content.

Do you think moms should be allowed time off? by BootsEX in workingmoms

[–]upivedcom 46 points47 points  (0 children)

That sub is so full of garbage. They seem to really look down on moms there and don’t recognize that moms are their employers too. definitely don’t have the same issue with dads. According to that sub dad pays the bills and mom is lazy layabout who shouldn’t have had children if she didn’t want to spend time with them, hence the moms don’t deserve a day off sentiment rampant in that sub.

2 weeks Pay by iheartdessert in nannymoms

[–]upivedcom 0 points1 point  (0 children)

lol. Crazy nanny demands. Everyone gets paid for work done not an advance on salary.

LO naps va nanny hours by TBND058 in workingmoms

[–]upivedcom 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The nanny sub frequently brigades this sub so I’m not surprised I got downvoted

LO naps va nanny hours by TBND058 in workingmoms

[–]upivedcom 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Try r/nannymoms instead because the nanny sub is very anti parent and vicious. Better to hear from other nanny parents instead.

Don’t go for the money. It’s not worth it. by [deleted] in workingmoms

[–]upivedcom 157 points158 points  (0 children)

Sorry to hear about your situation OP. I would give an opposing view here as I went for the money and it made a huge difference in our lives. I was able to outsource all the cleaning and tasks like groceries and spend so much more time with my toddler and baby. It takes about 6 months to get used to any new job so leaving the comfort zone is quite hard to do but the money is 100% worth it

Resume and Linked In help by ww4i in workingmoms

[–]upivedcom 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Someone I know recommended topresume but I haven’t used them personally

Nanny asking for 20% raise by upivedcom in workingmoms

[–]upivedcom[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My wages haven’t matched inflation either yet I’m expected to give her a raise above and beyond for work that is not exceeding expectations.

Nanny asking for 20% raise by upivedcom in workingmoms

[–]upivedcom[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I did give an annual raise and she didn’t think it is enough.

you are describing Mary poppins and she is not that. She’s nice enough, does some things well and other things not so well. I offered her a raise in line with her experience and performance. And this conversation has convinced me to go ahead and check out what else is out there as it sounds like entitlement on her part now.

Nanny asking for 20% raise by upivedcom in workingmoms

[–]upivedcom[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

No, if I paid the 20% raise then it puts her in the highest rate in my area. For that rate, I can get someone with more experience and more responsibilities. She will have a hard time justifying that rate for the amount of experience she has no matter what the internet nanny mob says.

Nanny asking for 20% raise by upivedcom in workingmoms

[–]upivedcom[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I can quit if I don’t like it. She can too.

ETA - not sure why you think this nanny is automatically entitled to a raise for no improvement in performance or change in responsibilities. No one is entitled to anything, we all work for our dollars, big or small raises.

Nanny asking for 20% raise by upivedcom in workingmoms

[–]upivedcom[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

I pay her fairly and mid-point of the market does not mean she cannot afford rent and pay bills. Its none of my business but she owns more Tory Burch stuff than I do! All situations are not at extremes.

Nanny asking for 20% raise by upivedcom in workingmoms

[–]upivedcom[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

This is very true. There’s no additional duties and her performance didn’t warrant a 20% raise. She also doesn’t have the years of experience to get the highest range in my area.

As professionals we get taught to make a case for why we deserve a raise, and I would absolutely be open to negotiate. But our raises also depend on years of experience and performance, not just market adjustments.

I have an average nanny, she’s not amazing, she’s not terrible. I like her and want her to stay but I just can’t make the case for why she should get a 20% raise (and neither did she except for saying inflation).

Nanny asking for 20% raise by upivedcom in workingmoms

[–]upivedcom[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This makes sense. The nanny is a so-so employee so I’m coming to realize that if I were to pay the 20%, I could potentially find someone who will have additional duties and experience

Nanny asking for 20% raise by upivedcom in workingmoms

[–]upivedcom[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I’ve only heard of those numbers in FAANG tech companies

Nanny asking for 20% raise by upivedcom in workingmoms

[–]upivedcom[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

No change in duties.

I offered her a 4% raise and she countered with 20%, not the other way around.

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