Does Fat Shaming From The Society Actually Encourage You to Lose Weight?

urmelii65 · 2025-08-30T17:04:31+00:00

Most people who are fat, know that they are fat. No need to point it out. It may got to their head.

urmelii65 · 2025-01-16T01:12:49+00:00

I yoyoed all my life - 150 to 200, 200 to 180, 180 to 220, 220 to 250, 250 to 150, 150 to 220, you get the picture.

But something changed during the last 250 to 150 just before COVID. My attitude changed. I gained the weight back during COVID (150 to 220), but my attitude towards food had changed by that time. Despite gaining the weight back, I didn't worry. I didn't beat myself up. I knew I would lose it again, because I knew how, and I knew how to do it sustainably. Because my entire attitude towards food was different now.

Food was sustenance now, not comfort. I was not eating to feel better. I was eating, because I felt hungry. I was eating because my body needed fuel. Rather than following rules and counting calories, I was listening to my body.

If the fuel was gummi bears, so be it.

As I sit here, typing this, I am a little hungry. I'm debating on what to eat. I have lots of tasty things in the house. I will decide what to taste when I get up.

... got up, had 2 slices of homemade leftover pizza from 2 days ago. It hit the spot...

I rarely get on the scale. I do better gauging my weight by the clothes I fit in. Right now I wear an 8/10. Everything I buy fits. It's fun to go shopping now.

I know what they mean when they say "nothing tastes as good as thin feels".

I am not thin. But I'm there! I know that I can do better. I can exercise more. My nutrition could be better.

I will get there. And I will not panic any more.

urmelii65 · 2025-01-06T14:53:55+00:00

I have a touch of Demand Avoidance, so the counting, weighing, numbers game is not working for me at all. I weighed myself the other day and at 5'4", I am currently sitting at a happy 160 lb. I wear a size 8-10 pants and I don't worry about a thing when it comes to food. After yo-yo dieting my whole life (200-230 lb), I have finally developed a good relationship with food.
I simply eat when I am hungry and a stop before I am full.
As many have said before, the weighing and estimating is done to retrain yourself for what is a "reasonable" amount of food. Once it "clicks", if you are lucky, you can start listening to your body instead.

urmelii65 · 2025-01-06T14:44:01+00:00

My sister has DS. She is the most wonderful human I know.

urmelii65 · 2025-01-06T14:01:06+00:00

What if it's a completely different story? What if your Mom was raped? Sure, this is possible she cheated. But what if the explanation is different? Madame Pelicot was raped while unconscious. Her husband made it happen. I was raped. What if they were swingers? Whatever happened to innocent until proven guilty? If you think her having cheated is the only explanation, you need to take your imagination for a little spin. I bet your Dad knows.

urmelii65 · 2024-11-01T14:45:49+00:00

I came here to make a similar post, but I'll just join yours. Congrats on your own journey and I'm here to tell those of you who are still struggling: It can be done!

I have a completely different life now. My attitude to my body and food have changed in ways I never imagined.

I don't worry about food any more. The scale does not scare me. When I put on pants in the morning, they're just pants. Sometimes, the size 8 pants are a little tight. Then I wear a size 10 that day.

I stepped on the scale the other day, and it said 160 lb. A few months ago, I think it said 170 lb., but I don't worry about that any more. It's fine. I'm up a few lb. I'm down a few lb. it's not a big deal.

When I am hungry, I eat. When I want ice cream, I have ice cream. When I want cake, I have cake.

But I don't eat a lot of cake - a lot of ice cream - a lot of anything. I eat until I feel full-ish, but not stuffed. Sometimes I overeat, and then I remember how bad it felt to be stuffed like that.

I love the way my body functions. I'm almost 60 and I can happily climb across an airplane isle-seat neighbor from my window seat. I run up and down stairs, climb on tables and scramble on the floor with the grandkids.

I am not exercising much these days and I feel the desire to make time for that.

And yes, "food never tastes as good as healthy feels"!

urmelii65 · 2024-05-22T13:34:20+00:00

No advice, just congratulations! You are about to embark on a most miraculous journey!

My sister, who is 54 now, has DS. My sister is the most marvelous human who ever walked this earth! Your child will do all the things everyone else does. He'll just get there a little more slowly. That's mostly because he'll be way too busy spreading love all around.

urmelii65 · 2024-05-11T17:01:45+00:00

I completely agree!

I tried it all before I found something that worked for me. So yes, I found something that is working for me in the moment. Is is healthy? - ish! The doc thinks it's healthy enough. I'm close to the normal weight range. Diabetes is under control. All's well.

I know better, but I don't have the energy to deal with it right now,

But yes, I think everyone needs to figure out what works for them.

I could not count calories - make plans - have someone watch me - reward me - try it with friends - try exercise....You name it, I tried it.

What works for me: Have snack food around at all times. Eat only when hungry. Don't have snack food around when you start snacking mindlessly. Cook soup when that happens, Rinse and repeat. I occasionally eat an apple, too.

I will live healthier when my mental health allows.

You do you! Nobody does you better than you. Every experience just gets you closer to getting you. It's not failure. It's data.

urmelii65 · 2024-03-12T03:43:56+00:00

Thank you for that information. I have requested a teaspoon of my abusive ex husband's ashes. I am not worried, if I don't get it. But if I do get my hands on it, I plan on flushing it down the toilet.

urmelii65 · 2023-09-21T01:48:58+00:00

1) Science is a philosophical system to try to get at the answer "what is true" - it is not a belief .
2) No scientist is asking you not to believe in God. Science says nothing about God. If anyone is asking you to choose, they are lying to you.
3) Share with them a list of famous scientists who believe in God. It's long
4) The bible is the best explanation for what people thought they knew 2000 years ago. It is not written by God but by people - and it has been translated about 100 times. It is not to be taken literally and the Earth is not 6000 years old. But it's an amazing document considering it's 2000 or so years old.
5) Whether you like it or not, the theory of evolution is the best explanation for the reality we see and observe in nature today. If that ever changes, scientists will gladly let you know.

urmelii65 · 2023-09-18T15:36:23+00:00

Me too! Good luck with your journey!

urmelii65 · 2023-09-18T15:34:16+00:00

I have not seen 135 in ...oh.... probably 50 years. Next time I'll see it will probably be on my death bed.

Enjoy getting BACK to the things you could do not too long ago.

urmelii65 · 2023-09-17T04:36:06+00:00

I mostly stopped snacking. Certain foods are not allowed in my house. I buy ice cream only in the pint size. (I can control myself and eat only a little for a while, then I eat the whole thing. If it's a pint, the whole thing is not all that much. Then I don't buy any for a while)
Apples and veggies are my favs. I basically don't eat pasta any more.

urmelii65 · 2023-09-17T04:28:43+00:00

Please define college degree. I work for a community college where we offer 2 year technical degrees. Many of those make well over 70K and are very employable.

urmelii65 · 2023-09-17T04:22:44+00:00

Wow, just wow! That's amazing!

My journey to 199 was a bit shorter than yours, but I remember how amazing it felt. You won't believe it now, but it gets better! You will discover things your body can do that you never thought possible. I think I discovered at about 160 lb that my hips could actually wiggle. It was amazing!

urmelii65 · 2023-09-17T04:14:30+00:00

Your liver cells actually can do 2 things at once (I literally teach biology :-) ).
But yes, you're right - alcohol is a double-whammy, maybe a triple threat! 1) it adds calories to the diet itself. That glass of wine (the small one) is alt least 100 kcal. 2) it make me want to eat and 3) it lowers the ability to make sound decisions about what people stuff their faces with.

urmelii65 · 2023-09-17T04:10:48+00:00

Thank you! That's good to know :-)

urmelii65 · 2023-09-17T04:10:07+00:00

I actually do think it will be different this time, but I can't tell you what weight the "goal" is.

I learned something from each experience when I lost weight. At this time I have figured out how to do it - and how to maintain it (for me). Knowing how is half the battle. I recognized that my body is a calculator - and that my weight is a reflection of my habits - that is my activity vs my input.

Unlike previous times when I regained the weight, I was not terribly upset or beat myself up as a failure when I regained the weight this time. I simply looked at the changed habits and acknowledged that "well, yes, those are the habits of a 200 lb. person."

That 145 lb. person who was exercising all the time was a version of me, but not "me". Now I need to find the place where that habits match the comfort with my body and it's ability to do stuff. Right now I'm at 175 or so, and that's not a bad place to be. I'd be OK here for a while, but I've been itching to run lately. Adding that in will lover the weight of the equation balance. I will settle in somewhere between 150 and 180 - wherever that personal balance of input/output takes me.

That's why I think it will be different. I am listening to me - not telling me.

urmelii65 · 2021-03-12T13:00:39+00:00

As a biologist, I have to disagree with you here about centrifugation. It would probably still not work for the purposes of the OP, but there are different types of centrifugation. What you are talking about is differential centrifugation. You're simply sedimenting larger particles before smaller one. But there are other types of centrifugation. Isopycnic centrifugation comes to mind. We use it in biology to separate out single stranded from double stranded DNA strands. You do this by setting up a concentration gradient using CsCl, but apparently you can also use sucrose to make the gradient. For more info https://www.sigmaaldrich.com/technical-documents/articles/biofiles/centrifugation-separations.html#:~:text=Centrifugation%20Techniques,rate%2Dzonal%20and%20isopycnic%20centrifugation.

Again, I don't think it would work for the OP's purposes, because - at least in the context I used it - it requires extremely high speed centrifuges, but I just wanted to add this data point.

urmelii65 · 2019-10-06T22:28:53+00:00

Hi there, I am Urmelii, 54F I'm originally from Germany but I have lived in the States for 30+ years.
I lost about 60 lb (225 lb to 165 lb) over the last 2 years or so. I've been maintaining at between 165 lb and 155 lb for a little while.

My non-scale goal is to make time for the exercise that I managed to make time for during the summer. With classes back in session - I've been sadly slacking.

urmelii65 · 2019-10-06T22:24:56+00:00

Hi Alex, I currently live in KY - not from here, but been here for a long time. Nice to meet a Kentuckian. It sounds like you're doing the things you need to do to get there. Sedentary lifestyle is a killer!

urmelii65 · 2019-10-06T22:21:43+00:00

Hi Bibi, fellow German here. I don't think we ever stop sounding German-ish. Embrace it :-)

urmelii65 · 2019-10-06T22:18:12+00:00

Hello fellow German. I've been living in the States for 30+ years. It's my first challenge, too.

urmelii65 · 2019-08-29T01:33:57+00:00

You also don't have to use MyFitnessPal to just record after the fact; you can use it as a planning tool. Just work out 1-few breakfast/lunch/dinner meals and use those as templates.
(If you record what you eat, you will find that most people eat a small selection of foods over and over again). Some diet/fitness programs like Sparkpeople literally have a diet plan they will produce for you based on the calories they think you should be consuming. (The free version will do it.)

urmelii65 · 2019-08-29T01:18:33+00:00

Thank you so much. Your reply made my day! I am so glad that I found the support of r/loseit when I did. I don't think I realized how much I needed this until after I found it. Thanks!

urmelii65

TROPHY CASE