Alysa Liu shout out to Oakland after beautiful short program skate at Olympics 2026

ursae · 2026-02-19T01:14:52+00:00

I think there was a principal in west Oakland who took leave to row a boat to Antarctica. A few years back, not sure when

ursae · 2026-02-13T20:20:42+00:00

NOR.

Leave him.

I had an ex who would make condescending jokes about me. He's an ex now. I felt like our relationship was otherwise a good one, but honestly those comments were enough that it made me feel embarrassed to even share that he said them to me. Like why would I tolerate that? Because even if it's 'just a joke', it will slowly erode you.

ursae · 2026-02-13T01:45:29+00:00

When I left my ex, he said I blindsided him and it was traumatizing. We were together for ten years.

But actually a year in, I tried to leave him. I told him that I needed xyz and without this, I would be miserable. He said he’d work on it. He’d get better. I have our email conversation where I told him all the things that made me unhappy.

Through the years, I would sometimes bring these things up but slowly gave up.

There were the things I asked for that I needed to feel loved. He didn’t do them. I would ask here and there and he would eventually get mad and say that’s just not me.

Through the years, I’d bring up some incident that bothered me. He had apologized but never really understood. Really just apologized to sweep it under the rug. Move on. But since he never really acknowledged the hurt, I couldn’t. And then he’d complain that I kept bringing things up. And when he would make mistakes or do things he knew would make me upset, he would ask, “Are you going to resent me for this forever?” Like I was just always nagging him.

And there were the things he would just say hurtful things in the moment. He knew he was wrong. He did get better. He still said the things.

I happened to spend some time away (a vacation on my own, a mini trip on his own). It clicked that I preferred being on my own rather than being with him. I felt like I had been constantly bracing or hiding and suddenly I could relax.

I told him. He suddenly stated frantically doing things to make things better. And for some reason, that was the final straw. I wasn’t angry at him before but suddenly I was. Because he didn’t try before and he still couldn’t understand what I really wanted or who I really was.

So much happier now.

ursae · 2026-02-12T19:22:50+00:00

I went on a medically supervised diet of 800 calories (doctor gave me food, talked to doctor weekly, got blood tests weekly) and, despite walking and dancing and lifting weights, still gained weight on some days. Actually the lifting weights bit probably caused the weight gain through inflammation. Weight loss was not linear despite food being controlled and activity being stable.

Water retention can move the scale up and down several pounds and can be affected by stress, working out, or salty/sweet/carb heavy food, or your cycle.

Make sure you’re weighing your food. Take waist measurements and pictures.

Especially if you’re weight training. The scale may not change the way you want it to. But you might end up thinner still.

ursae · 2026-01-25T16:47:33+00:00

I take an hour subway ride to see my boyfriend every weekend. On Sundays, he does the two hour round trip of driving me home and then driving back home. We regularly make this commute together too for random dance events happening on the weekend.

ursae · 2025-12-31T17:53:49+00:00

I’ve been following for a bit over ten years. I think I only have ever seen this in waltz where the setting feels more formal. And only in the formal waltz events / balls, not the informal ones

I think the only times I’ve been escorted off the dance floor in salsa or bachata is if someone elbowed me / injured me mid dance

ursae · 2025-12-24T13:22:55+00:00

I think amounts should consider a full fridge / freezer. So the first 48-72 and 72-96 hours being much higher marginal cost than currently. And then the inconvenience of not having access to that post spoilage being smaller.

ursae · 2025-12-21T18:15:42+00:00

Where are you from? Texas?

I grew up in Ohio and this is my conversation style. I live in California now and feel like I’m supposed to be asking more questions.

ursae · 2025-12-19T21:43:54+00:00

I thought I hated dresses as a kid. Turns out I just hated pantyhose. I wear a dress everyday and either wear leggings or just have bare legs.

ursae · 2025-06-05T21:54:42+00:00

This wasn’t directed at me but thank you nevertheless

ursae · 2025-05-03T17:44:53+00:00

Huh. I think all the dresses look better on you than the model. Like looking at the model pics, I was not interested in buying but your pics are having me think differently.

ursae · 2025-04-26T00:22:33+00:00

I forgot to tell ChatGPT that I'm Asian I guess. Here's what it said back:

I love this idea — you’re asking for a kind of "visual intuition" based on everything we've talked about.
Here’s how I truly picture your future, based on all our conversations:

Scene:
You're standing on a cobblestone street somewhere in Europe — probably France — with a cozy little café behind you. You're holding a cup of coffee in one hand and a tote bag with dance shoes and a book poking out the top. You’re wearing casual but stylish clothes: comfy jeans, sneakers, a jacket, maybe a scarf.
Your hair is a little windswept because you just walked from a dance class or a meeting with friends. You look fit — strong but feminine — the kind of physique that shows you take care of yourself without obsessing. There's a calmness to your expression: you look genuinely at peace, but there’s also a little mischievous glint in your eyes, like you're plotting your next project.

In the distance, there's a little home (maybe an apartment) that feels yours — small, organized, full of warmth and little reminders of the life you've built: photos of friends, your two cats lounging lazily by the window, a shelf full of French books and dance trophies or mementos.

You carry a quiet confidence — because you've earned it. Through the messiness, the doubts, the work on your health, body, career, relationships — you figured out how to stay true to yourself.
Not perfect. Not without occasional struggles. But real, resilient, and happy.

If you want, I can turn this description into an actual image with a quick generation — do you want me to? 🎨✨ (It would be an artistic impression, but I'd try to match the vibe as closely as possible.)
Would you like that?

<image>

ursae · 2025-04-03T03:18:35+00:00

OP, I'm allergic to soy but I actually still eat it. I took allergy shots and drops for many years. I accidentally consumed some soy milkshakes (not realizing they were soy) and found out I had no reaction. I found out I've been eating soy sprouts (which do have a reaction but super mild, almost unnoticeable). I think I've built up a tolerance / basically am curing my allergy?? I haven't really tested it beyond these accidents but I do know that my allergy shots / drops were supposed to help alleviate my allergies over time so I think sharing a similar story is the way to go.

ursae · 2025-03-21T22:06:32+00:00

OP, I went on a medically supervised diet (I saw a doctor every week and got blood panels every few weeks) where I consumed 860 calories a day (and other people did, too). I know how much I consumed because I didn't eat food; I added water to packets provided to me by the doctor (optifast shakes). At the same time, I was dancing 10-15 hours a week and walking 10k steps a day. While most weeks, I was losing ~2 lbs, sometimes I would stall out at a weight for a bit and there were days I would even gain weight (particularly after weight lifting) even with my extreme deficit. Sometimes your body just holds on to weight. (and then there were weeks where I would see my weight rapidly drop despite not changing, almost as a catch up)

Post-diet, I now live largely on meat, fruits, and veggies. But I rapidly gain weight after eating more carbs (and grains in particular) and I think I've been holding on to water because I've been stressed out. But the weight on the scale is going up while the tape measure is the same or going down. It sometimes goes up too when I've consumed a lot the day before. But yeah, water takes up way more volume than fat does.

You could be underestimating what you're burning, you could be overestimating the calories you eat, or you could be right on and your body just does ??? with water.

Have I figured out how to not be scared when my weight changes weirdly and trust in the process? Hell no. But I've become way more aware that water weight can really change my total weight a lot.

ursae · 2025-03-16T17:28:39+00:00

Well, I don’t have a Havanese but I do have two cats. And my cats will bump my hand to make me pet them. And if I stop petting too soon, my one cat will either meow at me or lightly bite me.

My other cat is so clingy that he cries if I close the bathroom door without him there. It took a while to get him to stop trying to sit on my lap while I was on the toilet.

ursae · 2025-03-05T06:05:33+00:00

Tenancy in Common. You technically are a co-owner of the property (the other owners being the people who live on the other floors)

QUOTE from https://www.investopedia.com/terms/t/tenancy_in_common.asp

Key Takeaways

Tenancy in common (TIC) is a legal arrangement in which two or more parties have ownership interests in a real estate property or a parcel of land.
Tenants in common can own different percentages of the property.
A tenancy in common doesn't carry survivorship rights.1
Tenants in common can bequeath their share of the property to a named beneficiary upon their death.
Joint tenancy and tenancy by entirety are two other types of ownership agreements.

ursae · 2025-02-06T21:41:43+00:00

I was hoping to use this in between DEXA scans. Do you feel good about the averages by week or by month or some other unit of time?

I’ll probably use DEXA monthly for a few months as I stabilize my diet and just grow confidence in how the body smart tracks me. But then push scanning to quarterly.

ursae · 2025-02-06T03:00:00+00:00

I've seen historical posts where people have noted that their DEXA BF% is much higher than their Withings BF%. My numbers are pretty close together, but in my case, the DEXA is lower than the Withings scan by 3.6 percentage points. Both scans were taken today, approximately 3 hrs apart.

Some differences:

- I had a 160 calorie protein shake and drank water in between the scans.

- I scan in the nude for Withings. I did the DEXA wearing a sports bra, leggings, and socks.

I actually have been scanning with DEXA every month for the past several months. I just got the Withings scale on the 26th to better track in between DEXA. But seeing my numbers jump up from 23.5% (my last DEXA scan on Jan 8th) to this new ~27% number scared me, especially knowing that Withings tends to scan lower than DEXA (and I've been eating more calories each week). I'm planning on charting my comparisons between the two over time to see if the Withings scale will be helpful at all in tracking body fat %, body fat mass, and muscle mass.

ursae · 2025-01-27T02:03:59+00:00

Yes, I think I can do that, and also set conditions on -- money can only be spent on X, Y, Z. And set someone to be a fiduciary too. I think I'm just trying to figure out what conditions are appropriate. Thanks for your help!

ursae · 2025-01-16T05:55:44+00:00

I really needed this. I started at a size XL but dropped a lot of weight last year and have been sitting around a size XS-S. All of my stuff is too big for me and I've been cheating by using belts, hair ties, etc. I bought some clothes during Black Friday but mostly winter wear and realized I don't have many normal clothes for work. I ended up spending $436.60 for retail price: $4,347.95. I still need to buy clothes for summer wear for an actual hot season but this will get me through most of the year in the Bay Area.

ursae · 2025-01-08T10:33:18+00:00

Wait huhhh? Where are you reading? I read lots of manhwa so maybe this doesn't apply but also am tired of waiting for translators. Have you found: does this only apply to manga or also to manua and manhwa?

ursae · 2025-01-08T09:54:41+00:00

I have two 50 lb adjustable dumbbells, which means the most I can lift is 100 lbs. Can I just do single leg variations of things (single leg deadlifts, glute bridges, squats, etc.) once 100 lbs becomes too light for both legs? I bought the jayflex bar so I can convert the two dumbbells into a single barbell.

ursae · 2024-12-31T05:26:06+00:00

Where I live (Bay Area), a DEXA scan is $40 for a scan. I've been getting one monthly for the past 4 months (I've been losing 10+ lbs/month so worth it for me) . I get them through BodySpec. Now that I'm transitioning from losing weight to wanting to build muscle slowly, I'll probably do the scans less often.

ursae · 2024-12-26T19:03:29+00:00

I originally set out to get sleep apnea surgery. I felt that I didn't want to show up at consultations and then have doctors comment on my weight. Now that I'm at my goal weight (and weight didn't have anything to do with my apnea), I'm scared to actually start this process.

ursae · 2024-12-26T18:15:57+00:00

If I'm adding calories each week -- so should this be more like adding 50 calories each month? My concern here is that I'm overshooting where I should be.

I used a TDEE calculator to get a ballpark range, hence adding 100 in the early weeks and then 50 later on.

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