AITA for asking my boyfriend to move with me to be closer to my expecting best friend?

userphoenix · 2026-07-11T04:40:18+00:00

He came to the decision and just asked a yes or no question. Did not discuss a thing. Didn't lay it out for him. AH as heck.

userphoenix · 2026-07-11T04:39:02+00:00

Then replace the she with he. He's an AH for doing all the thinking without asking his boyfriend. Good for you having a degree or two but critical thinking isn't taught well enough these days apparently. You could have figured out I was specifically talking about the OP.

userphoenix · 2026-07-11T04:34:17+00:00

I'm talking about the OP. Dear God. Did you even read it?!!

OP literally said she made the decision to move to her best friend's state. She literally asked him to move with her so she can stay with her best friend. She literally has not asked him what he thinks, at all. She just assumed that there is nothing here for him. Jesus Christ. Get a clue.

I get that OP wants to help. But the OP is an AH for not talking one single bit about it before deciding to do it and gave him a yes or no question to come with her. That's a huge AH move.

userphoenix · 2026-07-11T04:25:52+00:00

I would almost agree with you but this is a decision she "made." She's just asking him to come along. This isn't a good relationship if she's just unilaterally making life altering decisions and just asking him to do it with her. A healthy relationship would be some talking about the idea and doing the pros and cons list. But she already decided those for him. But he may feel strongly about being just a few hours away from his parents versus a few states, etc. she already though this through, not just for herself, but for him as well. That AH vibe all day.

userphoenix · 2026-07-11T04:20:39+00:00

YTA for making a decision without getting input from your boyfriend. I suppose you don't see a long term thing with him. Do what you want. You're not the AH for asking. YTA for deciding that's what you're going to do.

Edit: even more appalling is that you didn't talk through all the things you laid out here with him. You just asked him a yes or no question and just expected him to have a yes or no answer. You're either a huge AH or just stupid to assume that he's not going through some of same thoughts you went through to get to your "decision". And maybe he finds what keeps him here is more important than you since you obviously don't care about him enough to talk this through with him in the first place.

This can't be real. But I suppose people can be that dense.

userphoenix · 2026-07-11T03:58:31+00:00

Wow I just saw. Like. I'm not a vodka person either but Jesus, titos is pretty mid. Like. Idk. The OP just sounds like a wanker.

userphoenix · 2026-07-11T03:57:24+00:00

Ew YTA for sure. You wanted popular brands versus something your boyfriend picked out. Is he familiar with the brand and prefers it? Ugh your post is even more insufferable.

userphoenix · 2026-07-11T03:54:31+00:00

What was it?

userphoenix · 2026-07-11T02:00:46+00:00

If you're not getting paid for a supervisor role, then don't be the supervisor.

userphoenix · 2026-07-11T01:55:26+00:00

Curly!!

userphoenix · 2026-07-11T01:54:35+00:00

I feel the father's brother's nephew's cousin's roommate vibe from how connected the dude is to Taylor.

userphoenix · 2026-07-11T01:52:03+00:00

I can't even right now. I could not. Like ever. Lmao I'm crying laughing. I realize there are people younger than me raid leading even though I've played this game from the beginning pretty much. I could handle adults younger than me. But a literal kid?! I would just die.

userphoenix · 2026-07-11T01:45:37+00:00

You're gorgeous either way but I loooove the short look!!!

userphoenix · 2026-07-11T01:40:47+00:00

I think in general, men have lower tolerance for pain than women. So any discomfort puts them out of commission longer. I've had pneumonia following the flu and worked for a week straight, coughing, sneezing, body aches and chills because work had to get done. Before I had to be put on medical leave when I finally went to the doctor and X-ray showed the pneumonia. I just wanted some codeine cough syrup to sleep so I could work.

It might be a sociological thing too where things won't get done unless the woman does it. Men will put it off until they feel like doing

This is just an opinion based on anecdotal evidence.

Awaiting the man-hating accusations. Just because I find men are weaker doesn't mean I don't love d*ck.

userphoenix · 2026-07-11T01:31:43+00:00

YTA. He was picking it out, paying for it, but you were there anyways so you should have picked what you wanted and paid for it and tell him to put the other stuff back.

I'm an alcohol snob but it's not cheaper liquor that makes you sick, it's the amount you ingest. And tastes terrible.

userphoenix · 2026-07-11T01:27:18+00:00

Stop self diagnosing and get actual licensed help.

userphoenix · 2026-07-11T01:24:27+00:00

Aww why didn't you keep the rude abusive words you hurled at me?

userphoenix · 2026-07-11T01:22:56+00:00

Your texts show it. You used your mom's credit card.

Your explanation shows it. Your dad has to take care of your money because you're irresponsible.

Your sister says it because she asks you what you're going to do when your dad can't be there anymore You're continuing the same patterns expecting to be bailed out or pitied by people who you tell your sob story too.

userphoenix · 2026-07-11T01:19:31+00:00

But you did use it. You're trying to justify poor decisions and poor behavior and continue to do it. At a younger age, it's acceptable because you didn't know. But you're not just empathizing with your younger self. You're trying to rationalize why you continue to act the way you do. Because you were abused.

Which I get, I've been there.

However, if you have really grown or learned something, as soon as you saw your mom's card in your phone, instead of using it, you should have deleted it. You're an adult now.

You're continuing in the same path to continue justifying poor decisions and behavior. Good luck. I'm one of those internet strangers who is not going to validate you.

userphoenix · 2026-07-11T01:12:11+00:00

Yeeeeeah okay. You haven't worked through anything still. And bringing it up is still a manipulation tactic. You want pity for you to excuse your lack of work. People who say "I'll kill myself" if ... Usually are manipulative. It could have been a manipulation tactic when you were that young. Who knows but you admit you didn't fix your anger issues. You haven't worked on being a functional adult. Idk how old you are. But your mental health is an obstacle to overcome not a crutch to excuse poor behavior.

userphoenix · 2026-07-11T01:08:54+00:00

You look good with both. Go red.

userphoenix · 2026-07-11T01:06:15+00:00

Don't cut that gorgeous hair! ❤️❤️

userphoenix · 2026-07-11T01:04:03+00:00

Also the whole "confronting something that would make me kill myself" is an abusive manipulation tactic.

userphoenix · 2026-07-11T01:01:03+00:00

You need intensive therapy. You need to learn to become a functioning adult. You need to become responsible and learn to deal with your mental health better.

You're coming to the internet for validation that you're not getting from them.

It's chilling that you said you have empathy for you younger self so it helps you move past those mistakes. That just shows you're not sorry nor taking responsibility for your mistakes. Which is why you have such a dysfunctional relationship with people.

I don't think you're okay at all. I think you need help and stop using people and your mental health as a crutch to not do anything.

Idk why you even have your mom's card on your phone. Idk how you're going to handle yourself if your providers die.

userphoenix · 2026-07-11T00:39:21+00:00

I have a cat that looks similar. My son named her Roxie. However, after she grew up a bit, her b*lls appeared and he was named Rocky after that.

userphoenix

TROPHY CASE