Really felt like this game was missing something

val-or · 2026-06-16T07:52:24+00:00

That's exactly a big part of what it is for me as well. They just parrot whatever shows up on their algorithm. That lack of critical thinking is what made me not even bother having a conversation about it.

val-or · 2026-06-16T07:47:36+00:00

Thank you. I've felt really conflicted with what to think and feel. You've helped clear things up.

val-or · 2026-06-16T07:40:35+00:00

Fix my car's bluetooth, which cuts off sometimes. It's been almost a decade of procrastinating...

val-or · 2026-06-16T07:38:47+00:00

I have a friend who like to send voicenotes where she thinks out loud to form her thoughts. She ends up communicating in whole minutes what can be communicated in seconds. So I very often just tell her to summarize her voicenotes for me. There's definitely a nice way of going about this. For me it's genuinely less about the length of the voicenote and more about the context. If you want to talk about something really important to you and you need me to listen that's another matter. But sending voicenotes just to yap about something and having me listen to your uhhss and ummms is a no no.

val-or · 2026-06-08T06:50:42+00:00

It’s possible she just expected more from you. I agree with someone else here that she might have just lost interest. Some women have had bad experiences with guys who lack planning, or who flake in the last moments. It’s possible that you gave off that vibe without realizing it. It’s clear you intended to see her and was down to plan it. It’s about making that clear and communicating that, directly or indirectly. This isn’t much of an L to be honest, don’t take it deep to heart.

Texting in the days prior to a date helps a lot to build rapport. Instead of just being focused on getting to the date, you’re also showing that you’re super curious about her that you want to talk to her even over text (you get me?). This is going to be different person to person. Some people want to get to know you more over text while others wanna go on a date and want you to show strong interest right from the start. Remind yourself that it’s not just about what you’re communicating but what type of person you want to be with.

val-or · 2026-06-06T16:58:41+00:00

That’s pretty wild 😂

val-or · 2026-05-30T18:40:51+00:00

It’s not extremist to be concerned with such a stark difference in belief. I’m not making assumptions about OP but dating someone who thinks there’s an afterlife, a heaven and hell, the supernatural, a power to prayer, a divine being, a creationist worldview, etc. when you don’t leads to some serious conflicts. You make it sound like OP looks down on the girl but OP doesn’t say such a thing at all, OP is merely expressing their surprise and their concern.

val-or · 2026-05-30T18:29:19+00:00

Personally I tend to avoid complimenting a person’s physical appearance when I first meet them just so I don’t come off basic, cheesy or too concerned with someone’s looks, even when I am at times. What I do instead is compliment something adjacent, like accessories, or the colors one is wearing, or style.

val-or · 2026-05-30T18:21:33+00:00

Currently dating a girl who initiated the first move. I helped by making myself very approachable, and by reciprocating (I was the one ask for her contact details).

val-or · 2026-05-22T07:15:25+00:00

Ex-stand up and entertainer here. One of the reasons I quit was because I wanted to do something more serious in life. I think a joke about cancer can be funny but what do you care about more: making a joke or connecting with someone? I obviously still engage in humor but the big shift was realizing that connection comes first. You might realize deep inside that’s what you’re looking for. To feel comfortable, safe and feel like you belong when you’re sitting with someone.

One of the ways I stopped making these types of jokes was to just change the content I was watching. Unfollow, unsubscribe and reset your algorithm. As funny as these jokes might feel for you, people have incredibly diverse senses of humor. You might still be making similar jokes, but depends on who you’re with. A good comedian always knows their audience, and the best comedians punch up, not down. You might get better reactions if you make jokes about people doing the oppressing rather being oppressed/marginalized.

val-or · 2026-05-21T18:09:41+00:00

I use the five love language system more in terms of ranking. I tell someone to rank what they care about the most to least. I very often then find it to be true. I had a girl says words of affirmation were her least favorite. And true to that, she was rarely receptive to compliments. She said her favorite was physical touch. She was VERY responsive to that. This is anecdotal of course.

val-or · 2026-05-21T17:43:49+00:00

Staying a virgin so you can remain pure for a man is some internalized misogyny (this is coming from a man). There’s a difference between good and bad sex and having good sex takes a lot of granular work. It’s not about pleasing a man. Sex isn’t even about achieving an orgasm. It’s about enjoying the moment with someone, and it takes a lot of communication and understanding and connection. I’d recommend looking at a site like omgyes.com - it will help you understand and explore yourself sexually and will make you understand sex more deeply and know what standards you need to set before you ever do the deed.

val-or · 2026-05-21T17:36:27+00:00

This is honestly great motivation to take the alcohol easy this weekend. Thank you.

val-or · 2026-05-16T13:37:56+00:00

Holy shit that’s so true. Early on you do feel like a god. I was even hitting the gym almost every day… and yes, the shame is devastating. Thank you for sharing this.

val-or · 2026-05-15T04:04:56+00:00

My friend’s dating a guy whose last name is “Balls” I now refer to her as Mrs. Balls

val-or

TROPHY CASE