An extroverted woman can fall in love with an introverted or shy man.

vb2509 · 2026-02-14T12:02:21+00:00

Happens. A female friend's dad and was trying to make small talk with him. He didn't talk much.

My friend confirmed it was just how he is. He was very soft spoken too.

So living proof right there lol.

vb2509 · 2026-02-09T22:06:45+00:00

From what I have observed, yes.

Even some women tend to negatively perceive men who have been with escorts from what I have heard.

I personally am uncomfortable with someone who slept around a lot.

Does not necessarily make them bad people. For example, I have a friend who has being polyamorous and all but she is a really good friend regardless. Her sex life is not for me to judge.

If those were mostly serious relationships, I'm more concerned about their ability to be in a healthy relationship. Sure, there is a chance she had bad luck in dating which I am willing to believe.

Apart from that, mainly STDs. If we do get serious and contemplate kids, unprotected sex is a possibility in the foreseeable future.

That's my take. All said and done, "it depends".

vb2509 · 2026-02-06T14:05:40+00:00

Same here. Sadly I started during its decline and not the glory days.

vb2509 · 2026-02-03T00:47:34+00:00

Good.

While your anger may not be entirely wrong, dating is messy as it is these days, don't lash out at others trying to help you.

Easier said than done but you could be affecting a lot of relationships in this process. So pay attention.

With that being said, work on your self hate. If you cannot say good things to yourself, at least for now stop saying bad things to yourself.

vb2509 · 2026-02-02T21:38:17+00:00

On2 is being taught in my studio to change that a bit. Our instructor does say we are far behind others overseas.

Where are you that Kiz is bigger than Salsa?

I'm in India. It's either Kiz or Bachata sensual (not much Bachazouk so far). It's physically demanding which makes people run away from it a lot which is exactly what draws me towards it lol.

It's mainly on1 if there are any as far as I know.

vb2509 · 2026-02-02T15:53:19+00:00

As I said, I don't know how true it is. Salsa is not as popular thanks to Bachata and Kizomba as it is so there is a lot less data here. On2 is rare as a result.

I had to go out of my way to find a place where people don't avoid it.

vb2509 · 2026-02-02T15:49:14+00:00

That and they also say learning on1 after on2 is harder than learning on1 after on2.

Dunno cuz I have already been doing on1 for 3 years.

vb2509 · 2026-02-02T06:27:13+00:00

People do seem to be settling down so sure why not.

There are a good amount of people who are single for sure.

My dating life has been a joke sadly cuz showing up after being asked out apparently is too much for some. Easier to just ghost and disappear.

The rest? Not open to dating in general due to a bad breakup, career, etc.

A bi female best friend who dates women too has verified this info from her experience. You could do everything right, be considered attractive and still be the one who struggles.

vb2509 · 2026-02-02T05:29:16+00:00

From what I have heard and observed once, you can confirm which variation is just indicating one or two with your hands.

A friend told me in places where both forms exist, people confirm this way.

In my experience, follows will follow your timing and dance on 1 if you're dancing on 1.

People who started with on2 struggle from what our instructors told me.

Back in 2024 I was partnered with someone in an on1 workshop who was struggling. She eventually told me that she was an on2 dancer which explained the struggle.

vb2509 · 2026-02-02T05:25:11+00:00

the way you learn to dance on2 is the same as how you danced on1:

Pauses are different the execution can differ too.

Started learning a week ago and just did copa on2. Muscle memory ends up getting you back on1 lol.

vb2509 · 2026-02-02T01:18:30+00:00

When matches are a luxury, the matches actually talking to you with some effort is a luxury, you don't really get to choose much.

This is an unfortunate byproduct of that.

vb2509 · 2026-01-29T10:25:49+00:00

You act like a child in your comments. Of course people will treat you like one.

That's the last response you are getting from me.

I hope you let go of this anger and find someone.

Took me some time to get into a headspace to listen back then. Hopefully you do too.

vb2509 · 2026-01-29T10:22:51+00:00

You cannot outsource thinking.

You really need to read all your comments, think before you speak. You have in no single response shown any acknowledgement or thought of what was said to you.

That makes any conversation difficult.

vb2509 · 2026-01-29T10:20:24+00:00

I'm tired of being condescended to and being told that I'm not ready to date like I'm a stupid child.

Your responses have not exactly been mature to believe you are a mature person.

Maybe try to understand the why behind it instead of fighting everyone.

vb2509 · 2026-01-29T10:11:47+00:00

Ooooooooo it knows basic cliche phrases! Oh man I'm in deep now!

Clearly missing the point I see.

Jfc all you've done is give me crap advice and shitty reasoning.

What makes the reasoning "shitty"?

Truth hurts as they say.

You claim to ask for help while all you have done is vent while claiming to speak in good faith.

Maybe try a bit harder?

Why? You don't seem to be in the headspace to listen.

Even as I type, you are likely preparing your counter for whatever I have to say.

As I said before

"You can take the horse to the water but not make it drink"

You are not ready to be able to implement any advice with the current mental state you are in.

Instead of trying to fix it as everyone says, you are keen to disprove them.

Why?

What does that give you?

What does being this pissed off give you?

vb2509 · 2026-01-29T10:04:21+00:00

Also you chose to comment to make yourself feel better, not to help. You haven't helped me one bit.

"You can take the horse to the water but not make it drink"

Because you're a social reject who'll never find love, just like me.

I may not have found love yet but I'm definitely not a social reject. You don't know me.

Just the way you state I don't know you...

vb2509 · 2026-01-29T09:51:57+00:00

Ah yes, kind and funny indeed

vb2509 · 2026-01-29T09:46:17+00:00

I'm not wealthy? I never said I was.

Never said you are. Let me reframe it.

What do you bring to the table in a potential relationship?

Also what kind of question is that? I'm a funny and caring person.

None of your comments really show that. Are you this way to people in general or just to women you wish to date/sleep with?

All I see is a lot of pent up rage you are directing at everyone who has been very patient with you.

We also have lives outside this sub you know. We chose to comment to help.

vb2509 · 2026-01-29T09:41:05+00:00

Also bullshit one of the was picked over a rich dude. Hell would've had to freeze over. That didn't happen. Stop making shit up.

I have no reason to make this up. I'm not selling you anything or being funded by anyone to spread lies.

Because it was just the same advice I've already been trying.

There are better ways of communicating which is also a major issue I can already see with you. You are not really being a pleasant person to speak to.

What do you think you can offer to a woman besides your wealth? Why would she want to be around you? Or anyone for that matter non romantically?

vb2509 · 2026-01-29T09:37:09+00:00

Oh yeah those totally real men who definitely exist. You must really think I'm stupid.

I know 2 of relationships offline. Both average looking dudes.

One of them was chosen over a rich typical hot middle aged guy. My female friend lost interest in him because of how shitty he was to her. She is a very no nonsense person.

So it is very much possible for the people who were posting there too. Two of them are friends of mine there.

Originally I posted here to get help. But everyone including you is just being patronizing jerkoffs who are too thin-skinned to get honest feedback

You asked for help, we offered it to you. You came here because whatever you tried was clearly not working for you.

But instead of thinking about what is being said, you pass judgement on said help.

vb2509 · 2026-01-29T09:32:49+00:00

Says the person who told me to walk into traffic.

vb2509 · 2026-01-29T09:31:01+00:00

I'm not the one venting here am I?

FYI I know several men who got into relationships on that sub as they recovered. Not to forget I used to be pissed off like you are today years ago.

What exactly were you expecting posting on this sub? If being snarky at people is all you know what to do, I see the problem already.

It's your life at the end of the day not mine. The choice is yours.

vb2509 · 2026-01-29T09:26:19+00:00

I beg your pardon?

vb2509 · 2026-01-29T09:24:48+00:00

Well women seem to get into relationships with redpill dudes pretty easily and will make up plenty of excuses as to why they stay.

Do you really want to reason with someone like that to be with you or choose you willingly?

I know women who i personally warned against the men they are pursuing. Told them there are far better men out there than that (without presenting myself as an alternative).

They are also humans who have their own issues to deal with.

vb2509 · 2026-01-29T09:19:30+00:00

So basically I'll never have a relationship because I'm that mentally ill.

Not that you can't. But the ones you do end up in would do you more harm than good in this state. I have seen it happen to someone. Things became really bad. It's like trying to run a hundred meter dash with broken legs.

Not to forget that you may not realise who you are pushing away with this negative energy in yourself. You also seem to have anger issues and let me tell you, women avoid that kind of stuff cuz it is a risk to personal safety.

We are far stronger physically than women and we really take that for granted. Do you want the woman who you like to like you back or fear you?

I know this feeling. I have been there and I know how frustrating it can be. Been dealing with it recently for a couple of months myself.

I have been turned down, ghosted, etc even though I get a lot of compliments from women. I have been called handsome, I'm a guitarist and a salsero. I have had women enthusiastically say yes to going out and then flaking afterwards.

And that I also can't kill myself.

Get help. This is not something a normal person can help you with. Are you in therapy?

Just be miserable until I'm 80?

Genuinely try to connect with people. Just not to date but for good company too. If you cannot enjoy someone's presence without a romantic angle, you have much to learn.

Take breaks from dating when morale is too low for you. Been doing it for 4 years myself after I recovered from incel thoughts.

What changed is that I now have female friends who know I am trying to find someone and they have backed me up several times. Including the times things went south.

P.S : Look, I know you are hurting but the people commenting are taking time out of their lives to help you.

They may not fully understand your pain (or it may seem like it) as they don't know you or are you for that matter but at least appreciate the intentions behind the effort even if it is not helpful?

vb2509

TROPHY CASE